


Playing with Fire: A BLACKPINK Story

by hotlink907



Category: BLACKPINK (Band), Bandom, K-pop, Real Person Fiction, YG Entertainment | YG Family
Genre: Action, Action & Romance, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bodyguard, Celebrities, Concerts, Cute, Drama, F/M, Fluff, Forbidden Love, Hurt/Comfort, K-pop References, Mentioned Other K-pop Artist(s), Music, Musicians, Secret Relationship, Sweet
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-17 11:55:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 54,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28724724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hotlink907/pseuds/hotlink907
Summary: Oliver James is an elite private security contractor, working for one of the most exclusive companies in the world. When he is assigned to become BLACKPINK's 24/7 bodyguard, his life is changed forever by the four girls in ways that he could never expect.Follow the adventures of Lisa, Jennie, Rosé, Jisoo, and Oliver, as they navigate the rigors of touring, life in the spotlight, the shady criminal background of YG Entertainment, and... a secretive developing relationship?Rated Mature for language, suggestive situations, violence, and potentially eventual sexual encounters.Contact me at hotlink907@gmail.com if you want to talk!
Comments: 7
Kudos: 11





	1. The Assignment

_ 2018. _

I had taken a number of jobs with the firm before this point, but none of them had been with such a high-profile company. I was feeling nervous, something I hadn’t felt in some time. I was young for my job, still a few years away from 30, but my skills and record had spoken for themselves for some time now.

But when I received an order from my handler that I was to make my way to South Korea to meet with the head of YG Entertainment, it came as something of a shock. I spoke decent Korean—enough to be able to hold a conversation—and my knowledge of the country and their culture meant that I had heard of YG before. They were one of the largest in the entertainment business, known for their massively successful music acts.

They were also known for having… what could be called a less than savory reputation. That was nothing new to me. Plenty of my clients had been operating in gray areas of the law.

That was, in a way, how I had ended up in this position. I had joined the CIA at a young age as a field agent—I had aced the physical test and had shown remarkably high scores in other areas of physical aptitude. I had climbed the ranks quickly, completing missions overseas that I would likely never be able to talk about. Eventually, though, I had been headhunted by a private security firm, the company with which I now worked. I had accepted the job based on the fact that the things I did privately would be no worse than things I had been required to do when I was part of the Agency.

The Firm, which was the name of the company I operated for, was highly elite, offering private security contracts to wealthy, high-risk clients. Oftentimes, our services came with additional add-ons, things that went beyond protection. Of course, each of the Firm’s agents operated on their own set of standards. I had something of a higher set than most. I would not be a gun for hire and I would not work as an assassin, unless under extreme circumstances. When you hired me, you knew that you were getting the best protection that money could buy (and you were definitely paying for it). But you weren’t getting much else.

This is why I was surprised to hear that I was being sent to YG. I imagined that a company of their standing would have already had ample security. There was surely something going on here that either I or the Firm had not been notified about yet.

I arrived at YG’s headquarters in Seoul a little earlier than necessary, just to give me a chance to scope out the surrounding area. This was standard procedure. I didn’t get this far without being careful.

The building was impressive, as I would have expected, but I wasn’t going to let myself become intimidated by fancy architecture. Especially in a city as large as Seoul.

I did have to admit though, that I felt a little out of my depth. My Korean was passable, and in Seoul, many people spoke English, but as a whole, the country primarily spoke Korean. Luckily, I assumed YG would have taken this into account before I had been sent here.

I stepped into the lobby, wearing my sharply cut and fitted suit, feeling the weight of my sidearm in my underarm holster. I didn’t doubt that I would be patted down, but surely they would have expected me to come armed. It was, after all, why I was there.

<I have an appointment,> I said in Korean. <Oliver James.>

The secretary, who was one of several seated behind an ornate counter upon entering, scrolled down a computer screen and confirmed that I was meeting with the CEO and several other YG bigwigs.

Hyun-suk Yang was the founder and CEO of YG, as well as being one of the most successful South Korean artists of his time. There were rumors that he was involved in some criminal activities as well, but that wasn’t my job to think about.

An aide led me through the lobby, back to an elevator that required a key card for operation. We made the ride up to the top floor in silence.

Upon arriving, I stepped out of the elevator, expecting the aide to come with me, but she didn’t. Instead, she looked pointedly down at my shoes as the doors closed, and I realized the implication. This wasn’t just any office—this was Hyun-suk’s private area. Of course, I would be expected to remove my shoes as a sign of respect.

I stepped down the hallway and entered past the open double-doors, into a lavish office. Hyun-suk was seated at his desk, and he looked up from a folder of papers as I entered.

“Please,” he said, gesturing to the chair across from him. “Sit.”

<I can speak Korean, if you would like,> I said.

“No need,” he said. “You’ll likely have to do enough of that very soon.”

I figured he was right, so I opted to stay in English for the duration of the meeting. I settled myself in the chair. “Thank you for your hospitality,” I said, taking a drink from the glass of water that was laid out for me. “Your staff has been very efficient.”

“Thank you. We strive for that in all things.” He leaned back in his chair and studied me. He was pushing 50 but looked younger. He dressed in the same way that many CEOs of his era did—a blazer over a t-shirt. Just official enough to make it clear he was in charge, but casual enough to make it appear that he didn’t care. I knew this was an act. He cared very much, or I wouldn’t be here.

“So what can I do for you?”

Our protocol was a little unusual. The Firm would send out its agents to negotiate their own terms. Because we all had our limits as to what we would do, no one did the talking for us. It took yet another skill set, and it was just another reason as to why we were so sought after. There was no middleman.

His response caught me off guard.

“Are you familiar with Blackpink?”

I was, but only because of the research I had done before coming to YG. I had made sure to read up on any group that YG represented, because it was possible I would be attached to any of them. Truthfully, though, I had expected myself to be working with Hyun-suk personally. It would explain the great expense I was being paid.

“Sure,” I answered. “Your most popular girl group. Maybe your most popular overall. One of the biggest K pop groups outside of Korea.”

Hyun-suk nodded appreciatively. “Good. Then you may also know that they are about to embark on the biggest tour of their career so far. One that will take them to America and other countries.”

“Impressive,” I said. “But I’m not sure you have the right man for the job. I don’t just do security for bands. Not for the amount of money you’re offering.”

Hyun-suk nodded his head slowly. “Of course. And I expect you are aware that it will be far from simple.”

Here came the other shoe. I had the feeling that he was attempting, at least in some way, to pull one over on me. I said nothing. Better to let him play out his hand.

“You may be aware of some of YG’s… other enterprises. Well, we have made some powerful adversaries, you might say. Some who would stop at nothing to gain an upper hand in our ongoing conflicts.”

He paused, as if waiting for me to say something, but I remained silent. Finally, he spoke again. “If they were to extract any or all members of Blackpink, it would be both an embarrassment and a massive setback to our goals.”

So there it was. Blackpink was going overseas and YG’s management was worried they would be kidnapped and potentially held hostage. Not only would it cost them, but it would highlight the fact that they were engaged in probably illegal activities.

“You want me to make sure this doesn’t happen,” I said flatly. “There’s just one problem—this is a job for a team of people. I’m good. But I’m just one guy.”

Hyun-suk nodded. “Yes. But you won’t be alone. YG has some of the best security in the business. I want you to…” He hesitated, perhaps seeking the right words to describe a complex situation. “… insert yourself into their daily lives. You will be the final layer of defense. You will be close by, always. More than a bodyguard.”

I understood then what he was asking. It was to be a long-term assignment, likely a lonely one. It would be grueling, with lots of travel, probably surrounded by people I couldn’t communicate in-depth with.

“Let’s talk terms,” I said. If I was smart, this could set me up for a long time.

I named a number higher than my usual rate, and Hyun-suk did not blink. Good.

“Of course,” he said. “For the best, I will pay even more than that.” He countered with a higher number, and my suspicions rose again.

“There must be a catch,” I said.

“Not a catch. An… option. I may require you to do… other jobs. On the side.”

I shook my head. “No. Not without you telling me what they are in advance. I’m not an assassin.”

He frowned. “A retainer fee then. Ten percent more. And I will offer you jobs occasionally.”

“If I accept even _one_ of those jobs, the fee rises 30%,” I said. I didn’t expect him to accept this. It was an absurd offer, sending my rate higher than any contractor I had ever encountered.

Hyun-suk did not hesitate. “This is acceptable. I will have a contract drawn up.”

I stared in surprise, and it must have shown, because he laughed lightly. “You will understand,” he said. “Or maybe you will not. Either way, we will both be happy.”

I leaned forward to shake the man’s hand. “I’m honored.”

“The honor is all mine,” he said, before switching to Korean. <You put my mind at rest.>

He buzzed in an aide, who he had a rapid Korean conversation with. I picked up on most of it—he was instructing her to contact a lawyer, likely to create the contract. The details would be worked out later, as always. Nothing was binding until I signed.

“Would you like to meet the girls?” he asked.

“Ah,” I said. “Maybe when I’m more prepared?”  
It was always an awkward moment, introducing yourself as someone’s babysitter for the foreseeable future. Especially when they didn’t know that they were essentially a front for what was probably a criminal organization.

He scoffed. “Nonsense!” Then he paused and frowned, looking at me. “But you must promise me one thing.”

I pushed down my apprehension, keeping the thought of the fat contract in my head. “Yes?”

“No relationships with them. It is against YG rules. And you are very…” He gestured at my suit, my body, my face. “Well, let us say that women like you.”

I gave him a crooked grin. “Please. I’m a professional.”

“Of course you are. If you would come this way.”

\---

It was a valid request. I knew how K pop idol groups worked. A relationship with an American security man would be nothing short of a massive scandal. And they were naturally beautiful women—I had seen pictures in the dossiers, but the details escaped my mind.

The car ride to the Blackpink House was quiet. Hyun-suk and I had little left to say to each other. We had made our deal, and I would receive briefings later from staff members. I hoped I could form a rapport with the girls quickly. It would make my life easier.

“To be clear, you have autonomy,” Hyun-suk said. “I will instruct all security that while you are not in charge of them, they should follow any orders you give, should the need come.”

“Thank you,” I said. A lot of times, that could be the most difficult part of the job. Egos could get hurt, which almost always led to further strife.

The drive wasn’t far, and soon we were pulling up in front of what was honestly a shockingly beautiful home in the middle of Seoul. Living space was usually cramped here, so to see something this spacious came as a bit of a shock.

I suppose I shouldn’t have been surprised though, especially since Blackpink was so wildly successful.

We got out of the car and I found myself feeling a little nervous, which was unlike me. I had been doing this for a few years. This should have been just another job—but the amount of money tied to it ensured that was definitely not the case.

The front door was locked with a keypad. This would have been strange if the house had belonged to someone else, but wildly famous idols received top security. I was sure that there was a discreet team monitoring them always.

<“Hello! Girls!> Hyun-suk called out.

<Boss?> came a surprised voice from the next room.

The source of the voice stepped into view and I recognized Lisa Manoban almost immediately. She was unique in that she was of Thai descent, and had spoken no Korean when entering into the training academy. I couldn’t imagine how difficult that had been for her, but she had come through as one of the most famous and beloved figures in Korea. <I didn’t know you were coming by!>

Lisa saw me and stopped, clearly surprised and possibly a little embarrassed at a stranger seeing her in her home.

As was customary, Hyun-suk and I removed our shoes. I greeted Lisa with a slight bow. <An honor,> I said.

She returned the bow but was now looking at me with undisguised curiosity. I was taken aback by how beautiful she was. It was clear that she hadn’t planned on company or even seeing anyone, based on the lack of make-up and baggy sweatpants she had on.

<This is Oliver James,> said Hyun-suk. <He is Blackpink’s new security attache.>

Lisa looked at me a little suspiciously but did her best to hide it in front of her boss.

<What does that mean?> she asked.

Hyun-suk smiled gently. <I will explain. Is everyone here?>

Lisa nodded. <Do you want me to get them?>

Hyun-suk indicated that yes, he did want Lisa to bring the other three down. Lisa gave me one last glance before skipping away to another section of the house, where the other girls were no doubt located.

“I’ll be a tough sell,” I said quietly to Hyun-suk. “They won’t want me here.”

Hyun-suk looked pensive. “That doesn’t matter. They need to be kept safe. They will change their minds.”

Whatever other business Hyun-suk was involved in, he _did_ care about the girls. That made me feel slightly more justified in taking the job. Yes, the K pop industry was ruthless and the four of them had gone through hell to get where they are now. But at least there were people who cared about them.

<Boss!>

The four girls came into the room, all of them dressed casually. Even still, they were distractingly attractive, and I understood Hyun-suk’s warning about no relationships. It was something he probably needed to say to any staff member that would be working closely with them.

That wouldn’t be a problem for me. I was a consummate professional.

I bowed to each girl in turn. <My name is Oliver James,> I said.

<He’s going to be security,> said Hyun-suk. <Extra. For the tour, and for the future. He’ll be closer than the rest. More involved.>

The girls were looking at each other with thinly veiled skepticism. But they weren’t going to contradict the boss. It just wasn’t how things were done. <When does he start?> one of the girls asked. If I remembered the dossier properly, it was Jisoo. She had long, dark hair, and an almost ethereal beauty.

<Today,> said Hyun-suk. <I need you to be comfortable having him around. He will be on tour with you for a long time.>

I had expected something like this. I could have protested, but it would have made me look weak. And with the price that was I was charging, I couldn’t really set terms like a start date. Instead, I just nodded, agreeing with him.

<But…> another one of the girls said. This one was Jennie, who was looking at me with suspicion. I knew she had something of a reputation, but I also knew that the reputation was manufactured by the press and by people that were, for lack of a better word, “haters.”

<Is there a problem?> asked Hyun-suk, but his tone was light and it was clear that he was joking.

Even so, Jennie swallowed hard and shook her head no. She had a small, pretty face, that seemed to fall into an angry resting face. I sympathized. I was the same way.

Hyun-suk turned to me. “I can have a driver bring your things.”

I handed him my keys. There wasn’t much I traveled lightly, only taking what I needed and picking up the rest along the way. He gave me a slight bow, which I took as an immense sign of respect. “I hope to live up to your expectations,” I said.

He looked at me for a moment more. “I hope so too.” His tone was harder this time, and it served as a reminder of who I was dealing with. Someone else may have been intimidated. Instead, I just took it in stride.

Hyun-suk left, saying nothing else.

<So,> I said, after a moment, as the girls stared at me. <Is this strange for you? It’s strange for me.>

<Your Korean is very good,> said the fourth girl, who was sporting hair that was dyed a dark gold. Rosé, her name was. <What was your name again?> Her demeanor was a bit friendlier than the others, though if it was an act, I couldn’t be sure.

<Oliver James,> I said. <Call me Oliver. Or Ollie.>

Rosé nodded, a little awkwardly, then the room lapsed into silence.

<It’s okay,> I said. <You don’t need to entertain me. Just go back to what you were doing before. Your boss just wants you to be able to feel comfortable around me.>

The girls looked at me again, then Jisoo shrugged and left, her long dark hair tossing behind her as she went. Jennie left shortly afterward, leaving only Rosé and Lisa. After a moment, Rosé gave me an apologetic look and left, returning to whatever it was that she had been doing before my arrival.

“I’m sorry,” said Lisa, once they were all gone. “It won’t always be like that.” Her English was flawless, and her voice was bright and bubbly, even though she looked slightly embarrassed.

“It’s okay,” I said. “I’m used to it. Listen, is there some place I can make a sensitive phone call?”

“Sure,” said Lisa, leading me towards a door in the next room. “Out here is a good spot.”

The door opened to what seemed to be a small deck, looking out onto the city. “Thank you,” I said, giving her a smile.

“I’ll go get the guest room ready!” she said. “If you’re going to be staying here.”

“That would be perfect. It’s nice to meet you, Lisa.”

She bounced away, seemingly already at ease with me. But I knew that was more than likely an act. Lisa had always been the most positive of the group, even when she didn’t really feel it. That was okay. I would still be able to do my job.

\---

The call to the Firm took about an hour. They had received the contract details and gone over them with me. Everything was in order and I would be receiving physical copies shortly. I hung up my cell phone and leaned on the railing, staring out into the city. The sun was setting, and the sky was a brilliant, fiery orange.

The door opened behind me and Lisa stepped out shyly, closing it after her. “Is everything okay?” she asked.

“Yeah,” I said. “I think so.”

She came to join me, standing next to me on the deck, looking out at the city. “Is this what you always do?” she asked after a moment.

“Pretty much,” I said. “I’ve done this for a while.”

She paused and looked like she was going to ask me something but was too embarrassed to. Then, she worked up the courage to say, “Do you ever get lonely?”  
The question stunned me. Of everything I thought the pop star was going to ask, that had not even registered. Furthermore, it was a question that I didn’t think of much. My job kept me busy, and thoughts like that rarely, if ever, crossed my mind.

“Do you?” I asked. I knew the life of a K pop star could be overwhelming, exhausting, and even isolating, despite the amount of fame.

She was quiet after that, and she gently brushed her bangs away from her eyes, still looking out at the city. “I guess so. Sometimes. But the girls are like my sisters now. Do you have anyone like that?”

I supposed that I didn’t. I wondered if that made me lonely.

“I’m sorry,” she said, when I didn’t answer. “I didn’t mean to upset you. I was curious.”

“It’s okay,” I said, my voice soft. “It’s just not something I think about.”

“Do you want me to leave you alone?”

Truthfully, I didn’t mind the company. But it might not be a good precedent to set, having myself be alone with one of the girls, right off the bat. “Not at all,” I said. “But I was thinking of heading back inside, anyway. Want to come with me?”  
“Someone has to keep you safe from the wolves,” she said with a grin. “Come on. I can show you around.”

\---

The house was big, even if it hadn’t been in the middle of Seoul. Even for four people, there was a lot of room. Lisa showed me around, but the other girls must have been in their own rooms, since I didn’t see them at all. The tour culminated with her taking me to the guest room, which she had made up for me while I had been on the phone.

“Thank you,” I said, as she prepared to leave me by myself in my room. “I really do appreciate this.”

“We’ll be eating soon,” she said with uncertainty. “If you want to join us?”

Typically, I didn’t do things like that. I stayed separate from my clients, fading into the background. It was the best way to do things.

This would be different though. If I was going to be spending so much time with them… maybe I would handle things another way. My brief conversation with Lisa had made me wonder.

“Sure,” I replied. “If that’s okay with everyone else?”

Lisa smiled. “Of course! We’re not monsters!”

She left the room, and I smiled to myself.

I stepped into the small bathroom that was attached to my bedroom, just to freshen up. I looked in the mirror and saw that I looked tired. It made sense, after all, I had been traveling for quite some time. I splashed water onto my face and massaged my eyes.

My dark blond hair was cut short, as it always was, but was just the slightest bit unruly at the very front. I seemed to have permanent stubble on my admittedly sharply cut jaw, something that I had resigned myself to. I took off my suit jacket and hung it in the small closet, then unbuttoned the top two buttons of my shirt. I might as well be comfortable until the rest of my things got there.

After I headed back into the bedroom itself, I took a look around. Lisa had been kind enough to get the bed made and even fold towels. I couldn’t help but smile. She lived up to her reputation.

The room was cozy and lightly furnished, which was perfect for me. Once my car and my belongings were dropped off, I would be able to get my things put away in easy to reach areas—this meant mostly my tools, my weapons, and any other equipment. Like I said before, I traveled lightly.

I undid the buttons on my cuffs and left the room, hoping that my second meeting with the girls would go a little better.

As I walked down the stairs to the first floor, I could hear the girls laughing about something. I entered in the kitchen, which was attached to the dining room, and the conversation ceased the moment I entered. I held my sigh in.

Lisa was seated at the table, doing something on her phone. She looked up and gave me a bright smile. <Oliver! You took your suit off!>

<It was a getting a little stuffy,> I said. <Can I help you all with anything?>

Jisoo and Jennie, who were cooking, both looked at me with moderate surprise and said nothing. Rosé, who was fiddling with pictures on the fridge pointed to the next room. <Put some music on!> she said. <Something fun!>

<Uh… I’ll do my best,> I said, not having any idea what they would think was fun.

Lisa made a face at me as I walked past to the sound system. There was a small phone plugged into it, already open to Spotify. Mercifully, there were playlists already set up, taking away the bulk of the work for me. I selected one that had a fun cover art and the sound of bubblegum K pop came through the robust speakers.  
Rosé started dancing by the fridge, spinning away into Jennie, grabbing the other girl and twirling her. Jennie let out a surprised gasp and started laughing.

<Dance!> commanded Rosé.

Jisoo shook her head and continued with the cooking, but I could tell that she was amused by the antics of her friends.

I leaned up against the doorway and watched Rosé and Jennie dance. I couldn’t help but smile at these two world-class superstars, both wearing t-shirts and loose-fitting gym shorts, dancing away like any other woman in their home.

<Are you sure I can’t help with anything?> I asked Jisoo over the sound of the music.

She looked at me blankly. <I’m okay.>

<Just let me know,> I said, taking a seat across from Lisa at the table.

Lisa leaned in across the table and winked, stage-whispering. <At least you put on good music.>

Jisoo turned around quickly and pretended to become cross with Lisa. <I heard that!>

Lisa smiled and gave me a questioning look. “Did you like your room?”

Across the room Rosé stopped her dancing for a moment to chime in. “Of course he did! You got it ready for him!” I had almost forgotten that she had grown up in New Zealand, and the accent surprised me.

“I did,” I said with a smile. “Thank you.” 

Rosé and Jennie had stopped their dancing, and Jennie had turned the music down to more of a background level. Jennie rejoined Jisoo in the kitchen, and Rosé slid into the seat next to me.

“Are you excited for the tour?” she asked me, her face animated. Her excitement was infectious. 

“I don’t know,” I said truthfully. “I’m still learning how this is all going to work. What does your schedule look like every day?”

Rosé cocked her head, thinking. “Well, that depends. We have practice in a studio almost every day. And there’s a lot of press events too. Our managers tell us what we’re doing every day. Here, I’ll add you to the group calendar!”

“That reminds me,” I said, while Rosé pulled her phone out. “I’ll need your private numbers. I’m sure your management will tell you everything about me, but I could give you a little introduction if you wanted.”

Jisoo and Jennie brought the food and plates to the table. It was a Korean dish that I did not recognize, but it smelled excellent. I realized I was hungry then. It had been a long day.

“Sure!” said Jennie. “Why not let us know what we’re in for?”

Where to start? The goal would be to make them feel comfortable with me, something that was easier said than done, when my presence would be intrusive.

“I’m security,” I said. “That’s the simplest way to put it. But not just a bodyguard. I’m a specialist. That means I’m going to be around all the time. I need to have access to things that most bodyguards don’t have. And, yeah, that means I’m going to be annoying. I’d apologize, but it means you’ll be safe. As long as I’m around, nothing is going to happen to you.”

“So you’ll really be staying here?” Jennie asked. She was understandably curious. The situation was strange and unprecedented.

“For now. Once we’re touring, I’ll be staying where you’re at. YG is very concerned about making sure nothing happens to any of you.”

“Why?” asked Jisoo. It was one word, but her tone made it clear that she knew something was off. I found it hard to believe that none of the girls had ever caught wind of the fact that YG dealt in other less than legal practices.

“I don’t know,” I said, which wasn’t entirely a lie. I had no idea what had caused Hyun-suk to pick now to be the time to hire me. “All I know is what my job is.”

The table was quiet for a moment, the mood momentarily brought down.

Rosé perked up though, in an attempt to get everyone smiling again. “There! Here’s the number and now you’re on the calendar. No being late tomorrow!”

I promised her I wouldn’t. Jisoo was still looking at me suspiciously. I would have to mention this to Hyun-suk. I didn’t know how much he wanted them to know, and if there was anything I should keep in mind. The girls were all obviously smart, but Jisoo… she knew something was going on. I’d need to keep an eye on her.

\---

YG had a driver drop off my car and luggage that night, which I managed to get sorted away with no real problem. I was assured that basic day and night security was already covered and that long hours would not be an issue. That would allow me to spend my time in more productive ways, like making sure I stayed close.

I was headed back to my room, having made a sweep of the house, when I realized that I had just walked past Jisoo and Rosé’s room. The door was slightly open, and it looked like Rosé wasn’t there yet. I paused, just out of reach of the doorway, wrestling with the decision in my head. A minute later, I made up my mind.

I knocked lightly on the doorframe.

<Yes?> came Jisoo’s voice from the inside of the room. She had a soulful voice. It was the only way I could think to describe it. It had a unique cadence and tone, and I wasn’t surprised that she was a vocalist.

<Can I come in?> I asked.

There was a pause and then came the reply. “Ok.”

I came in to see her sitting on her bed, her legs tucked underneath looking at me. Her phone was next to her. It looked like she had been playing some sort of game on her phone. Unexpected, but not wholly shocking.

“What is it?” she asked. Her English was quite good, to be honest. She spoke with a heavier accent than the other girls, but it seemed to me that the one thing holding her back from complete fluency was her own confidence.

I didn’t say anything for a moment. I didn’t want to rush into the conversation and say something I would regret. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable,” I said, before sliding back into Korean. <I’m here to help. If there’s anything I can do, please. Just tell me. I know… ah, I know how you feel about me being here. I don’t blame you.>

Jisoo looked steadily at me for a minute. When she spoke, her tone was different than it had been during dinner. She was less dismissive. She was looking right at me. <It isn’t you. I’m… sorry about before. Forgive me?> she actually smiled at me with that. It was the first time she had smiled since I had seen her.

<Can I ask you what it is then?>

She cocked her head and glanced down at her phone. I could tell that she wanted to get back to whatever she was doing, but instead, she patted the edge of the bed with her foot. <Sit.>

I hesitated for only a moment. It would look bad… but who was there to see? It was going to be just me and the girls now for the foreseeable future. Other security, other staff, yes, of course, but when it really came down to it… it would just be us. I wondered if this was how they felt on a daily basis?

<I’m the oldest,> said Jisoo, after I was seated. <It’s not a lot… but in Korea, that matters. When things are hard, they look to me. Even if they don’t know it.>

I nodded. It was a huge burden, but it made sense.

<I know I seem silly a lot of the time,> she said, almost absent-mindedly. She was trying to balance a bottle of water on her knee, and only seemed to be half-paying attention to me. <But we all do. We have to, you know? That’s our image.>

<They tell you what you have to be.>

<Yes. But not in here. In here we are ourselves.>

I understood then. She was worried that I was here to enforce more rules on them. That I was here to by YG’s eyes and ears. To make sure that they were doing exactly as they were told.

<I told you the truth,> I said. <The only thing I want is to keep you safe.>

“I know,” she said in English. Then she paused and looked up excitedly. “I did it!” The water bottle was perfectly balanced on her knee.

The door opened and Rosé came in wearing pajama shorts and a loose t-shirt. <Jisoo, I—”> she broke off when she saw me sitting there, her eyes widening. <Oh! Sorry. I’ll leave—” She kept her hand on the door and started to back up.

I stood up smoothly. “It’s okay. I was just about to leave. We were just sorting somethings out.” I moved past Rosé and dipped my head to her in greeting. “I’ll see you all in the morning. Thank you for being so welcoming.” I switched to Korean for the final word. <Goodnight.>

<Goodnight,> said Jisoo from the bed, and her tone was a bit warmer.

A few minutes later, as I lay in bed and let my eyes close, I felt satisfied with how things had gone. Tomorrow, my assignment would officially start. If there were any hard feelings, I at least knew where they were coming from.

I was sure to clash with Jisoo a bit over my role. I would be intrusive, despite what I had promised. I had upset their balance, and the older sister of the group would not take kindly to that. Lisa seemed to like me, but I had no idea how genuine she was. Jennie was standoffish, no doubt wondering if I was going to treat her like so many other strangers did. And Rosé… well, she was a mystery. I had no idea what she was thinking.

It probably wasn’t going to be easy.

But it _was_ going to be unlike anything I had ever experienced before.

Part of me was looking forward to it, which was something I hadn’t felt in a long time. As I fell asleep that night, I was smiling. I hoped that feeling would continue into the future.


	2. Too Soon

_ 2018. _

I had always known that K pop idols’ lives were busy, but I didn’t understand just how intense that lifestyle was until I was able to witness it up close and personal. The girls were required to adhere to a strict schedule that monitored and carefully controlled almost every aspect of their lives.

From a monetary standpoint, it made sense. YG needed to make sure their brand remained safe and on top of the world. The best way to do this was with countless hours of practice, strict regimens, and plenty of mandated fan interactions (which were of course, carefully controlled).

On the other hand, it made me feel a little uncomfortable. The girls seemed to just accept that this was their life for the foreseeable future. They had little choice in anything, even where they lived—they told me that the House had been given to them as part of a reality show to increase fan interest. I supposed that they were used to it, but that didn’t make me feel any better about it.

We were on our way to their practice the next day at the studio, being driven there in a YG black SUV, with me in the passenger seat and the girls sitting next to each other in the back. The driver, who was just another YG employee, did not interact with me or the girls, and I wondered if he had been instructed to act as if we were not even there.

I figured that I could do the same in response.

<Do you ever get tired of this?> I asked the girls from the passenger seat. Traffic wasn’t too bad today, but even so, I was keeping my eyes peeled. Being stopped between two cars was a potential disaster if someone decided to pull up on you with a weapon.

They didn’t seem to understand what I meant, looking at each other for a moment before responding. <This is just what we do,> said Lisa.

<This was our dream,” cut in Jennie. <We work hard for it.>

<Yeah. Do you think it’s worth it?>

No one said anything to that for some time. Eventually, Jisoo broke the silence. <Some days, yes. Some days, no. Today, yes.> She offered me a small smile. <Today I want to dance.>

_But what happens on the days you don’t want to dance?_ I wondered to myself. The answer was obvious, of course. They would need to do it anyway.

After we got to the studio, I climbed out of the SUV and opened the back doors for the girls to get out. It wasn’t technically part of my job, but I figured if I was going to be keeping them safe, I might as well do everything I possibly could.

<Thank you,> said Rosé with a bright smile as she got out. 

I didn’t say anything beyond giving her a quick nod, keeping my eyes on the street and the passing cars. No one seemed to be paying attention or noticing. I had a feeling my job was going to be a lot of that before the tour got started. Surely, no one would be stupid enough to go after YG’s prized girl group in the middle of South Korea.

The studio was staffed with enough people to make my presence non-essential, so I wandered out of the practice room and into one of the upper levels to keep an eye on the street below. The building itself was unmarked and probably rented, which meant the general public had no idea what was happening here. If they did, it would have been swarmed with fans at every possible moment, which was clearly not the case.

There was a hallway on the second floor with floor-to-ceiling windows that I decided to use as my watching point. Below me, I could hear the thump of the bass as the practice began, even through the soundproofed walls. The practice must have started. It would continue for the next few hours, during which my plan was to keep up my vigil and check in on them every now and then.

I was curious in seeing what their practice looked like. For all the research that I had done on them, I hadn’t watched performances or anything of that sort. It hadn’t seemed relevant at the time, but now that it was going to be such an integral part of my life, I thought I might as well.

The streets were still clear, as all pedestrians and drivers were only going about their regular routines. I figured that I had watched for long enough, and headed back down to the practice room to see how everything was going.

I arrived just when they were taking a break. They were all dressed comfortably, without any flair, solely for utility. Baggy sweat pants and loose-fitting shorts were the way to go. Lisa didn’t even have a shirt, only a sports bra. They were all breathing hard, with a light sheen of sweat visible on their skin. 

<Hey, Ollie!> called out Rosé when she saw me. She took a drink from a water bottle and shook her hair back into place before coming over to sit on a railing and talk to me. Their choreographer was still talking to the rest of the girls about something in rapid, animated Korean. “Where were you?”

Once again, I was surprised by her New Zealand accent, before remembering that she was entirely fluent in English.

“I was just keeping an eye out upstairs,” I said. “Not much to see.”

“Did you come down to watch us dance?” she was beaming, and didn’t look the slightest bit tired, despite the fact that they must have been worked quite hard the whole time they had been practicing.

“Yeah, I guess I did,” I admitted.

<Let’s do a good one next!> Rosé called out to the other girls. 

They looked over, apparently not aware of the fact that I had entered or that Rosé had even come over to talk to me.

Jennie gave a little wave and poured a splash of water onto the top of her head, shaking her whole body with the shock of the cold.

Jisoo didn’t seem to react much. I supposed I wasn’t surprised by that. She was focused, and probably still not sure what to think of me.

Rosé gave me a friendly wink before skipping back to join the rest of the group, limbering up once she got there. The finer points of dance were lost on me, and even though I knew a bit about music, I was sure that their knowledge dwarfed mine. Even so, I was perfectly capable of appreciating experts at work, and that was exactly what they were.

The music started as the four found their positions on the floor. They began to move, slowly at first and then—

My jaw dropped. I was stunned at what I was seeing. I knew that they would be good, of course, but this was something else. Lisa was a force of nature, effortlessly contorting her body and moving so fluidly that it looked like she was doing it without thinking. Jennie exuded pure confidence and attitude, her face caught up with the music entirely. Rosé wore a huge smile on her face that lifted her cheeks and made her look angelic. And Jisoo moved with such grace and assurance that she barely seemed human while she was doing so.

When the song ended, the only thing I could think to do was clap.

<You liked it?> asked Lisa, smiling broadly.

<So much,> I answered honestly. 

“He liked it!” cried Lisa, high-fiving Jennie.

We all laughed, as if my opinion on their carefully choreographed routine meant anything at all, which of course it didn’t. They would continue on doing what YG designed for them... and I would be along for the ride. At least they were starting to warm up to me a little.

\---

The practice went on for two more hours, almost nonstop with only small breaks in-between. I was starting to see _why_ they were so good. They trained almost incessantly, and it showed in the quality of what they did.

As the time approached for them to leave and move on to the next thing on the agenda, I decided to make one more pass by the upstairs windows, just to see if anything was out of the ordinary before we exited. Some would say it was overkill and unnecessary, but for me, it was diligent.

I listened to the bass thump away below me as I looked outside, carefully noting the people walking by and the cars driving past—

And then I stopped. Something had caught my attention, but it was hard for me to say what it was. I was aware that something was off... but it took me a minute to process it.

There were two cars, both black, one a four-door, the other a compact SUV, parked on opposite sides of the street. Both were fully occupied. I counted at least eight individuals—men, all of them. Ordinarily, this would have meant nothing. After all, it was hardly a crime to sit inside your car on the street. But given what I had been told...

As far as I knew, they were not addition YG employees. If they were, then there would be nothing to worry about. But if they weren’t...

I unconsciously checked my gun, making sure it was loaded and in working order. I hadn’t expected anything to happen this soon after starting the job. What had Hyun-suk not told me? Had he known something else?

It didn’t matter. The first order of business was extracting the girls from the building. Obviously, that meant using a back exit if possible. There was at least one, which I had checked out on coming in. But there was no guarantee that it wouldn’t be covered as well, if there really was a problem.

I moved quickly, without thinking, rushing down the stairs and past the studio, back to the door that would lead to the rear of the building. I slowed down once I saw the door, making sure I didn’t look like I was in a hurry, and casually opened it, stepping out into the alley.

There were two men standing there, both wearing white shirts with sleeves rolled up, looking at me suspiciously. One of them, wearing sunglasses, jumped a little when I came out the door.

<Easy,> I said.

<What?> he asked, his tone aggressive.

<Just need a smoke,> I said, reaching into my suit jacket. <Damn. Left them at home.> I looked at sunglasses. <Any change you could help me out?>

Sunglasses looked at his friend (partner?) and shrugged. 

Time slowed down for me. My decision was made. My instincts were screaming at me. It was no coincidence that these two were standing here after I had seen the two full vehicles out front. They had counted on the fact that no one would blink at two cars of men. But I had. These two men had only been placed here to cover the exit if the girls decided to step outside.

They hadn’t expected me.

Of course, I could have been wrong. But I wasn’t betting the safety of the girls on a maybe.

There were two of them, and only one of me, but that didn’t matter. Neither of them were prepared for me to lash out while sunglasses was reaching for what I assumed was the cigarette I had requested. I grabbed his arm, pulling him downward, and drove my elbow into his face with a crunch. The second man went for a gun, or at least I thought it was a gun, because he didn’t get far. Before sunglasses had even hit the ground, I was turning, ducking, and throwing a quick jab into the second man’s stomach, causing him to double up. 

I slammed my knee into his face with such force that he fell backwards, head smacking painfully of the concrete. Sunglasses was still conscious, but was bleeding heavily from the face and was in no position to fight back. I kicked him hard in the skull, and he stopped moving.

It only took me a second to bend down and check their coats. They were both armed, and I recognized the guns as something a civilian would never carry.

I left them there. YG could handle the cleanup. I needed to get the girls out of there before the men out front realized something was wrong. I ran back into the studio, to find that the girls were no longer dancing and were seat on the floor, with the exception of Lisa, who was stretching. 

Jisoo saw me first. Her eyes went to my face and then to my drawn gun, which I had pulled out right after reentering the building. Her face went pale and her eyes widened.

<What is it?> she asked. 

The girls looked at her confused, then turned to see me. Rosé let out a gasp when she saw my weapon. 

“There’s no time!” I said, forgetting to use Korean for a moment. <Back door, now!> I turned to one of the guards who was hanging out by the front door. <Bring the car around. Do it slowly. No panic.> My Korean was faltering due to the stress I was under, but apparently it was good enough to get the point across, because two of the YG employees went out the front door, walking as calmly as the possibly could.

<Follow me,> I said. The girls hesitated for only a moment before coming with me. <The car will be out back.>

I didn’t get a chance to follow them. The front doors burst in only a few seconds later, three armed men entering, weapons drawn. I could tell, right away that they weren’t highly trained. Their clothing and even the way they held their guns made it apparent. They were dressed like people who wanted to intimidate, not people who wanted to win. An amateur mistake.

The girls weren’t almost out the door before the first bullet was fired. It wasn’t aimed at them, probably because these attackers, whoever they were, didn’t want their quarry dead. Dead, they would be worthless. Alive... that was a different story. 

I ducked and spun to the side, hesitant to shoot. If I could get out of this without my gun going off once, then I would be—

“Oliver!”

Lisa, who was the only one who hadn’t made it out the backdoor yet, shouted at me, but it was too late. Someone had come up from behind me, delivering a crushing blow to the side of my head. I went down hard, rolling, trying to put some distance between us, trying to figure out what had _happened_.

There was only one answer—he had been in the building from the start. He must have been hiding somewhere upstairs, and I had missed him. Or worst, assumed he was staff. 

“The car!” I called out, scrambling to my feet as the three men who had come in the front door moved on Lisa. “Go!” 

The rest of the men who had been out front must have been headed around back. The car needed to leave now, even if it meant I got left behind.

_Damn._

I raised my gun and fired. One of the attackers fell to the ground, bleeding from a wound in his shoulder. The other two hesitated, and the third, the one who had hit me, was already coming at me again. He growled something at me in Korean that I couldn’t make out, but the meaning was clear.

_This is taking too long._

He barreled into me, driving me backwards, pushing me away from the two that were still headed for the back door. I couldn’t let them get there.

I planted my feet, refusing to be pushed back any further and slammed my elbow into the back of the man’s neck, sending him to the floor. Before he was all the way down, I drew my knee up into his chin with a jarring crash, and he fell motionless at my feet.

But the two who were still standing had nearly made it to the door. I didn’t know whether or not the car had already left. I could only hope that it had, but even if that was the case, that would bring with it another set of problems. I wouldn’t be with them, which meant they would be vulnerable to further attacks. On the other hand, if they were still here, it meant that the present danger was higher than ever.

I sprinted for the two who were still standing, throwing caution to the wind. One of them turned and saw me coming. His eyes widened and he lifted his gun, firing twice, too quickly to aim properly. There was no way either of the shots could hit me.

And yet, one of them did, grazing my upper arm and sending a white-hot knife of fiery pain shooting through me. I gritted my teeth and kept going, but was slowed noticeably. My own gun was up in response, firing, taking the time to aim unlike my attacker had.

A hole appeared in his forehead and he slammed backwards onto the ground, his partner nearly tripping over the corpse.

I didn’t have time to celebrate, even mentally, and my arm was in too much pain for me to even think of such a thing. I didn’t have time to aim again either, and instead focused on cutting on the now terrified final attacker before he made it out the door. 

The intimidation factor must have worked because he stumbled again, giving me enough time to catch up to him, tackle him, and deliver a crushing blow to his nose. I felt the cartilage give way, but I didn’t even stop to look at the damage I had done to the man’s countenance. I didn’t care. I was already facing towards the door, so close I could feel the air and see the sunlight. I staggered back up onto my feet and moved as quickly as I could out to where I had sent the girls, only a few moments ago.

My heart sank when I saw that not only was the car still there, but the _door was open._ Lisa was sticking her head out the open door, waving me towards them. “Come on!” she urged.

I could feel my strength flagging, but it didn’t matter. They had stayed behind, for better or for worse, and I was not going to waste the fact that they had done that. I was only a few steps away from the car, slowing down more than I had before, when Lisa let out a scream. I reacted too late and was blindsided, knocked hard to the ground, the wind leaving my lungs entirely.

Lisa was yelling something, but I couldn’t hear her. The man on top of me was huge, far bigger than the others that I had dispatched since the attack had started. For the first time, I felt a moment of uncertainty. If I couldn’t overcome this—

“Go!” I choked out, but the car didn’t move and I heard Lisa yell something else.

_Dammit!_

I struggled to get my gun to bear, but the man on top of me was too strong and I was already injured. I brought my elbow crashing into him, again and again, hoping to get just enough room to fire once, even if just to get him off of me—

And then I heard the cars. There were at least two of them, judging by the sound of the engines, and they were probably the ones that had been parking out front. They must have circled the block to find amateurs, except for maybe the guy on top of me, but it didn’t matter. One lucky blow was all that it would take.

No. I was not going to let these girls be taken, not after they had waited behind for me, with great personal risk to themselves. Pure strength was not going to win this for me, I just didn’t have it in me. Instead, I fired my gun blindly, straight up into the air, as close to the two of us as I could get. It wasn’t aimed at anything, and wouldn’t hit anything. That wasn’t my goal.

My goal was achieved the instant I pulled the trigger. The sound was deafening, so close to our heads, that I could no longer hear anything besides a dull ringing. The giant man on top of reeled backwards, his hands suddenly clutching his ears. I staggered to my feet, shifting unsteadily. I could just barely make out the pitch of Lisa’s voice and I could see, blurred but unmistakable, two cars driving up the alley at us, surely filled with more men.

I dove into the girls’ car as fast as I could and croaked, “Drive!” as I lay on the floor, literally at Lisa’s and Rosé’s feet. The driver accelerated the car and pulled out into the open streets, weaving into traffic, just seconds before the other two vehicles pulled up in the alley.

I nearly blacked out, but managed to hold it together enough to roll over and climb into the passenger seat. The driver, another YG employee, had a panicked, wild look in his eyes and I could tell that this was the first time he had ever been in a live fire situation.

It didn’t matter. The other cars weren’t going to start a shootout in the middle of a Seoul street, and all we had to do was head back to the house. Other YG people would be on the scene in moments, and we would be okay.

<Just drive,> I said through clenched teeth, still feeling the burning in my arm and the bruises already forming on my body. I would need to talk with Hyun-suk. Clearly there were things that he needed to share me. <Drive.>

\---

When we made it back to the Blackpink house, there was a lot of yelling. From management, from security, from people who were speaking so quickly and angrily that I was having a hard time understanding what they were all saying.

Nor did I really care. Everyone was ignoring me for the most part, so I slipped away to my room, to bandage and clean my wounds. The house would be swarming with security; they didn’t need me downstairs.

Once in my room, I sat down heavily on the bed, my head swimming, and I unbuttoned my shirt, peeling it off my body which was now covered in sweat, bruises, and small amounts of blood. My bullet wound, which was only a graze really, was still bleeding, but it hurt worse than it looked. I sighed heavily. 

Things could have gone worse. They should have gone worse, since I hadn’t expected that much at once, not in Korea, in the heart of the girls’ home. YG had said nothing about this. Either they hadn’t known or they had lied. Neither was a good look. I’d call Hyun-suk later. He had already left me several messages, but I simply didn’t have the energy. And I had done my job. The girls hadn’t been touched, even if none of it had gone the way I would have liked.

I winced as I prodded my wound, then wiped beads of sweat off my forehead. Most of those men had been a joke, as evidenced by how quickly I had taken them out. But that last assailant, the mountain of a man… he had hurt me. Possibly worse than the bullet had.

I didn’t even notice there was someone in my room until they were almost next to me.

<Oliver?>

I jumped, unable to stop my instincts, and the slim figure next to me flinched backwards. It took me a moment to realize it was Jisoo. She had changed out of her practice clothing and was now wearing a simple white graphic t-shirt with jean shorts.

“Oh, fuck,” I grimaced when I saw the brief look of fear on her face. <Jisoo, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—>

She shook her head and offered me a smile. <I should have knocked.> Then, as if she had just noticed for the first time that I was shirtless, her eyes widened a little and I saw her cheeks turn a little pink.

<Sorry,> I muttered, grabbing for my shirt in an attempt to shrug it back on.

<No,> she said softly, reaching out to touch my arm. Her skin felt cool against mine and I felt myself become strangely calm, given the circumstances. <It’s okay.>

<If anyone sees...> My voice trailed off. I didn’t need to finish the sentence. The implication was clear. The girls were not allowed to fraternize with men, not visibly at least. And the house was currently filled with YG employees, who were no doubt on the highest of alerts.

<I don’t care,> she said, her voice steadier than I would have expected. <You did a good thing. I’m sorry for how I acted when you came here.>

<I understood,> I said, because of course, I had. It was only natural that she would have been suspicious of me, a stranger invading the bubble of life that the girls existed in. <You don’t have to apologize.>

“Let me get that,” she said, in her accented, but easily understandable English. I knew that it was her way of showing me that she regretted her earlier actions. She reached for the bandages and alcohol wipes, and strangely, I allowed her to do so.

I inhaled sharply at the sting of the cleansing alcohol, which always burned, no matter how much you thought you were used to it. We sat there in silence for a few minutes while she tended to the wound on my arm. I felt hyper-aware of my body, of the layer of sweat that covered me, of how utterly different the two of us were. She managed to look like a sculpture, like the idealized form of human beauty, and I was... a mess.

Once the bandage was affixed to my arm and the sting had begun to abate, Jisoo started examine the bruising that was forming on my abdomen. It was only in the early stages, but it was admittedly quite ugly and would only look worse over the next few days. “You did that for us...” she said, her voice trailing off. She reached out hesitantly and looked at me with her deep, gentle eyes.

I nodded silently, and she extended her hand out to my chest, softly moving her palm down to my said, tracing the bruises. “Does it hurt?” she asked.

“It will,” I said, not wanting to lie to her.

“I am sorry,” she said. “I don’t know what happened.”

“Neither do I,” I said quietly. “I should have been prepared.” 

Her hand continued to slowly move about, before coming to rest on my hand. “You were a... hero,” she said, pausing to find the right word. “I saw. Thank you.”

<It’s my job,> I said, maybe a little more harshly than I intended. <It’s just what I do.>

Jisoo withdrew her hand as if she had been burned and turned away. I could tell that I had upset her, even if that hadn’t been my goal. But the conversation had been veering into territory that Hyun-suk would not have approved of.

<I’m sorry I suggested it,> she said, a little coldly. I didn’t blame her. My tone had been the same.

<No,> I said, after pausing. <Don’t be. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. It _is_ my job. But I didn’t want anything to happen to any of you. It didn’t matter if I was being paid or not.>

She turned back to me and offered me a small smile, and again, I was a little shocked by just how beautiful she was. “I will see you later?”

“Yeah, I’ll see you. Thank you, Jisoo.”

“Don’t mention it.” She smiled mischievously and held one finger up to her lips. “For real.”

I mimicked her gesture. “I won’t.”

\---

Following the strange and unexpected encounter with Jisoo, I needed to take care of some business. My heart rate had lowered dramatically and I felt remarkably calm. I figured that I might as well make the necessary calls now. 

It went as expected. Hyun-suk was furious, not with me, but in general. I wasn’t happy either, but for different reasons. Our conversation was brief, but he assured me that he would handle any legal trouble that came as a result. Unfortunately, he didn’t know who the men had been. It was unclear whether or not he was telling the truth on that matter, but I decided to let the matter rest. I didn’t want to discuss anymore business. I wanted to check in on the girls and see how they were, now that things had calmed down a little.

I pulled my shirt back on and carefully made my way downstairs. I knew that even though it was getting late, the girls wouldn’t be in bed yet. Not after a day like that. I didn’t even feel like sleeping, and I had experience with situations like this. It wasn’t long before I could hear the sound of an acoustic guitar being strummed softly and the muted voices of the four girls. They were outside, sitting in a circle on the back patio.

I slid open the door and stepped out into the evening air. The girls didn’t notice me at first. Jennie turned after a moment and smiled, then patted the wicker couch she was seated on. I took a spot next to her and leaned forward, listening to the sweet, melodic sound of Rosé’s guitar. No one said anything for awhile, and it was... nice. Rosé was clearly a talented guitarist, something that she probably didn’t get to show off much. Maybe that made it more relaxing for her, since she could separate it from her daily grind.

As the sound of the last note echoed and faded into silence, I spoke, my voice low, so as to not disturb the peaceful feeling. The patio was lit with a soft orange glow and the girls looked calm, despite what had happened. They had each other.

<How are you all?> I asked. I didn’t say anything else. They knew what I meant.

<How are _you_?> Jennie asked, looking at me with concern. She tucked her legs up underneath her and turned sideways to face me. <You were—>

I waved her concern off. <Thank you, but it’s okay. This is what I do. I’m worried about you all. This isn’t something that normally happens to you.>

Lisa, normally so cheery, didn’t seem to have much to say. She was still smiling, but this time, I could tell. The smile was fake.

Rosé was the first to speak. <I think we’re all scared. Why did that happen? Why is no one telling us anything?> She looked at me a little nervously, lowering her face to the ground. <And why are you here? I don’t mean in a rude way! It’s just... weird, you know?>

I gave her the most reassuring smile I could muster. No one had looked oddly at Jisoo since I had come outside, so I assumed that meant no one had any idea of the brief encounter we had shared. <It _is_ weird,> I replied. <But let me tell you something. Hyun-suk is my employer, but he isn’t my boss. I’m here to do a job for him—keep you all safe. That means I’m here for you, really.> It wasn’t the truth, not entirely. I certainly would never tell them about the side agreement the head of YG and I had arranged, but the crux of the statement was honest.

<Then what’s happening?> asked Jennie. <Who were those men? Why did this happen to us?>

<I truly don’t know. I can guess, if you want. I assume they were probably attempting to kidnap you for money. It’s not unheard of, and I’ve dealt with it before.>

The girls looked at me soberly until Rosé blurted out, “But are we safe?”

I held her gaze steadily. “As long as you’re with me, yes. You can trust me.”

<I trust you,> said Jisoo idly, and I noticed that she wasn’t even looking at me anymore. She was sitting opposite me, on the other wicker couch, clicking something on her phone. “I feel okay.”

Rosé, who was sitting next to Jisoo, gave her a little poke. “Don’t be rude!”

I laughed. “I really don’t mind. I don’t want you to look at me as a guest. I’m just… here now, you know? Live your lives like you normally would. It’s weird, I know. But we can make it work.”

“It’s really weird,” said Lisa, laughing too. “But… I’m still scared. Is that bad? I trust you… but…”

I shook my head. “I was scared today too. I’ll probably be scared next time. It’s okay to be afraid. That’s how you know you’re alive.”

Jisoo shrugged. “I am afraid.” 

Rosé rolled her eyes. “You were scared! You were grabbing my arm and yelling Oliver’s name, just like the rest of us!”

“But then he hit them all. Very hard!” Jisoo said, emphasizing her point with a fist pump. “It was fine.”

The girls laughed and I felt better. A weight had lifted off my chest. I knew that my bruises would be killing me in the morning, not to mention the wound on my arm, but that was okay. I had done my job, even if I had needed to do it far earlier than anticipated. Rosé started playing on her guitar again, and Jennie leaned her head against my shoulder. I felt her small body relax next to mine. I thought for a second to discourage it but decided against it. No one seemed to think twice about it, and she looked happy and relaxed. That was enough for me.

\---

It was only a few hours later that I found myself getting ready for bed. I changed the bandage on my arm as quickly as I could, making sure that nothing was infected. The bruising was entering that mildly horrifying stage, but I had expected it. There was nothing to do about it except wait.

I stepped away from the mirror, shirtless once more and collapsed on my bed, sore and exhausted. There was so much that I would need to do now. This could not become a regular occurrence. And if it did, then Hyun-suk had grossly underestimated his problem and I would be requiring a higher fee. Well, that would be a conversation for another day. I reached for the book that I had kept sitting by the edge of the bed. Just a few minutes of reading before I drifted into sleep.

I was interrupted by the arrival of someone at my room. This time, there was a knock at my door. I sat up, not knowing who or what to expect. Surprisingly, I saw it was Jisoo again, dressed as if she had been just about to go to sleep, wearing loose pajama shorts and a baggy shirt.

<Do you need anything?> she asked, her low voice still managing to sound honey sweet. 

I sat up to regard her. <I’m okay. But thank you. Sleep well tonight.>

She looked at me for a moment, her eyes lingering on the livid bruises that covered my body, and I knew she wanted to say something about them. But she didn’t. I was grateful to her for that.

<I will see you in the morning then,> she said with a small smile. <Sleep well.>

She left the doorway then, leaving me alone with the darkness and my thoughts. I felt satisfied, as if everything had worked out okay anyway. The job was only beginning, but even after the violence of the day, I was happy with how it had gone. And that moment of peacefulness, under the night sky, with the sound of the guitar and… the companionship of four people who seemed to genuinely appreciate—well, that moment had made it all worth it.

When I fell asleep that night, I was smiling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you for reading and (maybe!) commenting. I'm having a lot of fun with this story.  
> And as always, this is entirely a work of fiction. Any mistakes made are entirely my fault, and I apologize for them. I've taken some liberties with the housing situation as well as geography, just for a better story.  
> Please support BLACKPINK and get a ticket to THE SHOW! I'll be watching live ^_^


	3. Secrets

_ 2018. _

As much as I had wanted to get a good night’s sleep, it apparently was not destined to be. I woke up in the very early morning, before the sun had come up, with an excruciating pain radiating from my ribs outward. No doubt it was from the beating I had taken, but knowing the cause of the pain didn’t make me feel any better. To make matters worse, the gunshot wound was burning, which wasn’t a bad thing—it meant it was healing—it just wasn’t the kind of condition that was going to allow me to nod back off.

I staggered out of bed and into the bathroom, almost afraid to remove the bandages and examine the bruising. My breath hitched as the white cloth bandages came off and revealed the livid, ugly, purple bruise beneath. It was massive, far bigger than I had expected. The pain no longer surprised me. It seemed about right for something of this size.

After rebinding my side, I realized that there was no way I was going to be getting back to sleep. It didn’t bother me too much—I was used to years of running on fumes, so all things considered, this wouldn’t be the least sleep I had ever gotten in a night.

I left the bathroom and dressed, a simple white t-shirt and pants that were fitted to allow me a full range of movement. I headed out into the common living area, my book tucked under my arm. If I couldn’t sleep, I could at least read.

But when I made it out to the living area, I heard something that surprised me. I had expected the other occupants of the house to be asleep. Maybe that was my mistake, given what they had all just gone through. Sometimes I needed to remind myself that not everyone was as capable at dealing with trauma as I was.

The lights were off, so it took me a second to make out what was happening. Everything became clear to me quickly. Jennie was sitting on the couch, curled up, hugging her knees. And she was crying softly, her hand over her mouth, trying to muffle the sound of her tears so as to not wake the entire house. As far as I could tell, she had no idea that I was even there. I hesitated, not knowing if I should approach or just let her be.

_No one should have to be alone when they feel like that._

The voice in my head felt like it belonged to someone else. It wasn’t my job to comfort my clients. Just to protect them. But then again, if they were traumatized, it would be much harder to keep them safe. Right?

That was what I told myself as I gently approached the couch and sat on the other side of it without saying anything.

Jennie wiped her eyes with the heel of her hand and looked thoroughly embarrassed. I didn’t say anything. For one, I wasn’t sure what to say. And it didn’t seem like there was much that I could say anyway.

“Sorry,” she said with a sniffle. “I didn’t wake you up, did I?”

“No,” I said. “Don’t worry.”

I didn’t ask if she was okay. That seemed like a stupid thing to ask, given the circumstances. “What is it?” I asked.

“Nothing,” she said quickly, putting on a smile that lifted her cheeks.

“Yeah, I don’t know you that well. But I think I know you enough to say that Jennie doesn’t cry over nothing. Was it the sounds? The gunshots? The punches?”

She looked at me with wide eyes and I could see that her lower lip was trembling. I remembered my first time in a live-fire scenario. I had reacted much the same way. And that was after I had been trained for it.

“I keep seeing you,” she whispered, and I could tell from the sound of her voice that she was fighting back her tears again. “Underneath him. But this time, you don’t get him off you. He just keeps hitting you, over and over, until you’re...” Her voice trailed off and I let the silence linger. Meaningless words wouldn’t help. Sometimes silence was just as powerful. “That’s stupid, right? I don’t even know you.” She was looking at me as if she wanted me to validate her _and_ to tell her that she was wrong.

“I was scared,” I said finally. “I was afraid I wasn’t going to make it back to you all. And I was afraid that if I didn’t make it back to you all, that something was going to happen. It’s not stupid.”

She edged closer towards me on the couch, looking a little hesitant, as if she was asking for permission. I slid to make room and rested my hand on the back of the couch, trying to say without words that it was okay for her to come closer.

She was surprisingly small for a woman who had built a career on being powerful. Her smallness was only accentuated as she slid down the couch and pressed herself into me. There was nothing suggestive or sexual about it—it was the act of a human being who desperately wanted to be comforted. For me, it was strange. I had spent years separating myself from people emotionally, especially clients. But these girls were unlike anyone I had worked with before.

Jennie leaned on me, and I could tell from how tense she was that there was still a war going on inside her, an internal struggle to not let out what she was feeling. Maybe she wanted to appear strong in front of me. Maybe she just wasn’t comfortable crying. Or maybe (and this was the one that I personally believed), her years of stardom under YG had led to her having to hide her emotions almost constantly.

Her weight on my ribs was causing me a bit of discomfort, but I didn’t react or show it. Instead, I put my arm around her small, hunched-up shoulders and held her calmly. If any of the other girls walked in, I had no doubt it would cause a raised eyebrow at the very least, but it just felt like the right thing to do.

“I’m okay,” I said, my voice low. “We’re okay.”

“I just don’t understand why it happened,” she whispered, her voice almost inaudible despite the fact that she was right next to me. “I’ve never seen anything like that.”

What was I supposed to tell her? That her boss was involved in a world that she knew nothing about? That would specifically violate the agreement that I had made. And if I was dismissed... then who was going to do the job next? I couldn’t guarantee that the replacement would be as good as me. And now I felt responsible.

“You’re a very public figure,” I said finally. “Some people might have realized how much they might stand to gain from that.”

“I guess. I just don’t want to be the cause. Of more violence, you know?”

That broke my heart a little. She wasn’t the cause—she was only the victim, trapped in the middle of a world that she didn’t even know was there. Jennie and the rest of Blackpink were immensely talented, strong women, there was no denying it. But this just wasn’t their realm.

It was mine.

“You were never the cause,” I said firmly, giving her a little squeeze, despite the sting in my ribs. “And you never will be.”

She nodded and yawned, then looked embarrassed. “Will you stay here with me?”

“Sure,” I said. “I wasn’t going back to sleep anyway.”

Her eyes were red and her face was tired, full of the exhaustion that comes after a flood of emotions. “I’ve been up way too long.”

“I’ll be right there,” I promised. “I’m not going anywhere.”

She turned herself around and curled up, laying down sideways, her head on my lap. “Is this okay?”

“Get some rest,” I told her, reaching for my book again.

“Thanks,” she said sleepily. Then, almost as an afterthought, she added, “I’m glad you’re here.”

I didn’t respond, because I didn’t know what to say. I wasn’t sure how to encapsulate my thoughts. It wasn’t until after she drifted off that finally realized what it was that I wanted to say.

“So am I,” I said quietly, setting my book back down and looking at the exhausted woman laying her head on me. “So am I.”

I watched the sun slowly crack the horizon, and I breathed along with the steady and slow rise and fall of Jennie’s chest. A little peace went a long way.

\---

It wasn’t the sun that woke me up, though. In fact, I didn’t even realize that I had fallen asleep until I heard footsteps behind me, followed by a little gasp. My head jerked upright, hard enough to remind me that sleeping with my neck bent all the way forward was probably not the best of ideas.

It was Rosé, I could tell without even needing to turn around. I had no way of getting up without disturbing Jennie, and it wasn’t like I really had anything to hide, so instead, I elected to not move and pretend that I just hadn’t noticed anything. 

Rosé tiptoed into the kitchen, and I heard her rummaging through the cabinets for a moment. Jennie sat up slowly from my lap, then seemed to realize what had happened. I saw a look of panic on her face for a second, but I shook my head and tried to give her the calmest face I could muster. Rosé was already leaving the room, heading back upstairs, so I waited until she was just out of eyesight, then got up quickly. Jennie reached out to stop me, but I was faster than she was, given the fact that sleep was still clouding her eyes and her reflexes.

I caught up to Rosé before she had gone far, but well after she had left Jennie’s vicinity.

“Hey,” I said, reaching out, keeping my voice quiet, not wanting to alert anyone else. “Wait up.”

Rosé turned around and looked at me a little skeptically. As usual, I was a little startled at just how shockingly symmetrical and perfect her features were. “What is it?” she asked as innocently as possible. I wasn’t fooled.

“I just wanted to explain,” I began, but she cut me off.

“You don’t have to explain anything,” she said. It must have came out harsher than she intended, because she offered me a genuine smile. “Really. It’s okay.”

“She couldn’t sleep,” I said. “She was...”

“I know,” said Rosé. “I just didn’t expect to see you. And I didn’t want to wake her.”

“We can keep that between us?” I asked.

Rosé nodded, smiling, her eyes twinkling. “A little secret. Of course!”

“It’s not a—” But my words were lost on Rosé, who was already laughing and walking away. I realized then that she had been making fun of me a little—that the girls didn’t take things as seriously as say, their management might.

I shook my head and walked back to where Jennie was sitting in the living room. She was in the process of fixing her hair up and attempting to make herself look presentable. “How did it go?” Jennie asked me.

“Fine,” I said, honestly. “I think she was laughing at me a little. Don’t worry.”

Jennie sighed. “I know. I still get nervous sometimes.”

I had a lot to say on that subject, but it didn’t seem worth bringing up right now, especially when we all needed to get ready for everything that would be happening that day. The schedule, as always, was sent to my phone. It looked like the big event for that day was going to be a photoshoot involving all four girls for some sort of promo. The specifics weren’t given to me, and I assumed they knew. If they didn’t, it didn’t matter much, I supposed. They were told what to do and where to go, and in return, they were made into massive stars. It was a fair trade… probably.

Fortunately, I had far less to do than they did. Of course, they didn’t need to pick outfits or do make-up, as the shoot employees would do that for them, but their routine was still much longer than mine was, for many reasons. I ran a quick shower, taking it easy on my wounds, and then hastily wrapped myself up, dressing into a perfectly cut suit that I had not owned the previous day. A little gift from YG, I assumed. I wasn’t complaining about it. Now, hopefully, I would look a little less out of place when it came to being with the girls.

I was, as expected, ready to go before any of them. I idled outside in the enclosed front yard, which was surrounded by an impenetrable wall with cameras, motion detectors, and locks that were hard coded to only open with specific pass codes and key cards. The wall meant there wasn’t much of a view, but the morning sun felt refreshing anyway.

The door opened behind me and Lisa stepped out, stretching and yawning as she did so.

“Good morning, Ollie!” she called out in a chipper voice.

I couldn’t help but smile at her infectious attitude. As usual, she was remarkably charming.

“Ready to go?” I asked.

Lisa shrugged. “I’ll be ready when they are. You know how it is!”

I did know how it was. Years of waiting for clients had left me very familiar with how it was.

“I’m in no rush,” I said. “I go where you go.”  
Lisa cocked her head. “Speaking of, did you see Jennie last night? I woke up and she wasn’t there, so I got a little nervous.”

I was afraid that question had been coming, so I tried to deflect it as naturally as I could. “Did you go looking for her?”  
Lisa blushed a little. “No. Well… I almost did. And then I remembered that you were here, and I felt better about it all.”

“I think she was just downstairs,” I said casually. “I’m sure it was nothing.”

Lisa looked like she wanted to say more, but the door burst open and the other three members came out, chattering rapidly about their upcoming day. I was looking forward to seeing them in action again, and this time, hopefully, things would go a bit smoother than they did yesterday. Living with them, I saw their softer, goofier sides. But when they were working, the transformation was stunning. That was when they really showed off how strong they were and how talented they were.

I had never been one of those fragile men who felt uncomfortable when faced with a powerful woman. On the contrary, I knew just how hard it could be to exist as a woman, especially in this industry. They seemingly had never let that challenge stop them, and it was impressive.

<Time to go, time to go!> said Jisoo, ushering Rosé and Jennie along. I exchanged a glance with Lisa as we both tried to hold back our smiles, then followed the trio out through the front gate into the waiting car.

There was one thing that would be happening today that I was not looking forward to. I was going to need to talk to Hyun-suk about what happened. Of course, I had performed as needed, had done everything required of my position. But what _had_ happened? He had been certain that nothing was going to occur until the tour began. That was obviously untrue. Had he lied? Had he not known?

Given how powerful and wide-reaching YG was, I was fairly sure he had lied. We would need to discuss that fact, and I would need to do it out of earshot of the girls. Likely during the shoot, while they were occupied and safe.

The drive to the studio was uneventful, though I was extra vigilant, not even hearing most of the girls’ conversation behind me, from where I sat in the passenger’s seat. Jennie hadn’t said anything to me or even indicated that our encounter last night had occurred, which was probably for the best. Being around the other girls was no doubt raising her spirits, which was what I had hoped for. Which just left me to do my job.

Upon arriving at the studio, I got out to let the girls out of the car, which received a wry smile from Jisoo. <Why, thank you, sir,> she said in a voice that let me know she was being entirely sarcastic with me. Not that I would have expected anything else.

We entered the studio, and I saw that there were YG employees everywhere. Many were security, something I could discern from the tell-tale signs of guns being hidden in waistbands and under coats. The girls seemed to know exactly where they were going and what they were doing, so I just stayed behind them, keeping an eye out at all times.

A few moments later and we were in what seemed to be a green room, a place to rest and sit in between takes. The girls’ managers were there, and they took over, giving instructions and breaking down everything that was going to be happening.

I perched myself on a ledge off the side, watching the bustle happening all around, and unbuttoned my suit to remain comfortable. The girls were in their element, even if Rosé seemed to be getting a little nervous and Lisa was having trouble focusing.

Jisoo was off in the corner, and it took me a second to realize what she was doing. When I did, I was only further impressed at what it was that the members did. She was trying to get into character—and it was only a photoshoot, not even a filmed piece with plot. Granted, I wasn’t a model, and I figured that modeling contained more than a little bit of acting but seeing Jisoo’s process only made me respect her even more.

<Time to change!> Lisa sang out, looking over a schedule for the day. I assumed the schedule listed outfits and the concept of each segment of the shoot. <To the dressing rooms!>

She was so clearly excited that I couldn’t help but smile. I hopped down from my perch and gave her a little nod. <I’ll see you in the shooting room.> My job description did not extend towards violating their personal space, even if my mere being there was a little disruptive in general.

Instead, I left the green room and into the hallway, walking in the direction of the room that they would be doing the shoot in. Sure, I didn’t know my way around the building that well, but it was easy to find, given the amount of personnel that were all around. The flow of traffic was clearly going in one direction.

I slipped behind a handful of interns and stepped into the shoot room, a cavernous room with staff and photography equipment everywhere, along with temporary partitions to give the girls some brief moments of privacy. There were props and small sets that had been constructed. I assumed this shoot would be for promotion of the new songs they had released this year, as well as the tour that would be starting soon.

The atmosphere was busy and hectic, but it reminded me of times that I had experienced when in the CIA. This wasn’t my first time around celebrities. In the past, I had even been required to fit in, to pretend to be one of the rich and famous. This time, I was happy to fade away into the background.

My eyes roved over the room, drinking in the business at hand. The girls hadn’t yet arrived, though I knew they would soon, no doubt in breathtaking outfits that showed off how beautiful they were. Everyone here was just… part of the machine that kept the YG juggernaut running.

Someone shouted something in Korean, and it took me a minute to realize they had just given the two minute warning to the arrival of the girls. The activity in the room ramped up considerably, with people running here and there, making sure everything was set up properly.

I almost laughed. All this fuss for Jennie, Lisa, Rosé, and Jisoo—who probably would have all been happy with a digital camera and a plain background. Yeah, they were superstars. But I had seen in the last few days that they were just people.

Someone brushed past me, moving hurriedly for the room exit. I would have thought nothing of it, had they not been dressed just differently enough to catch my attention. Most people in the room were wearing official YG clothing, adorned with badges and symbols. There were a few management types wearing suits and a few stylists wearing more casual clothing, but this person had their hood up and they were slightly hunched over as they moved.

If that had been it, I might not have continued to look. But the way they were moving… and the direction they were moving in… it was the way that the girls would be coming from.

_This can’t be happening again._

And it probably wasn’t, but I still needed to do my job. So I waited until the hooded individual was a little bit ahead of me, then started to follow them, slipping through the crowd with practiced ease. The hood was moving like they were nervous. Or possibly scared. And they were raising red flag after red flag, the more I followed them.

<Thirty seconds!> someone yelled, and the hood sped up, making a beeline for the door.

I slipped out the door right behind them, before it even closed, and I saw them duck into a bathroom just off to the side.

It was exactly where I would have gone had I been planning an ambush.

_Son of a bitch._

It _was_ happening again. Hyun-suk and I were about to have words, there was no doubt about it.

As far as I could tell, there was only one of them this time, and this person, whoever they were, was an amateur. I didn’t draw my gun. I didn’t see the need to alert everyone in the building and cause a panic—yet. I made a mental note to start packing a silencer. I hadn’t expected to need one, but apparently all my expectations were being thrown.

The girls were no doubt going to be turning the corner in just a second, so I moved quickly. I entered the bathroom, knowing that the second I did so, all hell was going to break loose.

And in fact, it did.

The door closed behind, and the second that it did, the hooded individual launched themselves at me from behind a stall. I had no time to think, and even less time to react, but I didn’t need it. The technique was sloppy—powerful, but undisciplined. I grabbed them midleap, spun them, and slammed them into the stall, hard enough to knock their hood down.

It was a tattooed Korean man, my age or younger, glaring at me with frustration and hatred. We locked gazes, his desperate, mine cool, before he lashed out with his knee, forcing me to release him and back away.

That was when he went for a gun that was hidden under the hoodie, and my instincts kicked in.

I didn’t draw my weapon—I didn’t want the noise. Instead, I lunged forward before his handgun was even able to clear his waistline. I grabbed the man’s head, not bothering to throw a punch or deliver a strike. Instead, I drove his skull into the stall, once, twice, and then three times, until the gun clattered to the floor and the armed man lost consciousness.

He was bleeding too, not profusely but enough to leave a stain on the stall.

I let the limp body fall to the floor, then bent to check for a pulse. It was there, but it was weak. He would live. He just might not be happy about it.

I reached for my phone and dialed Hyun-suk’s personal number. It rang twice.

<Oliver? What is it?>

<Get to the shoot. We need to talk.> My tone left no room for argument.

Oddly, his was amused. <You’re in luck.>

<Yeah?> I wasn’t in the mood for cryptic nonsense. The girls had probably passed by, only feet away, from a man with a gun.

<I’m already here.>

I gritted my teeth in frustration. <Then send some men to the bathroom outside the set room. There’s someone they’re going to want to talk to. Surround the set room and surround the girls. No one in or out until we’re done talking. I’ll see you on set. In five.>

I hung up, not giving him a chance to respond. I didn’t want to hear whatever he had to say. But he was going to need to listen to me.

\---

<Glad you made it,> I said, my voice heavy with sarcasm. We were standing off to the side, while Hyun-suk’s men handled the situation quietly. The shoot had started and it sounded like it was going well.

<What did you want to talk about?> he asked me plainly. His eyes weren’t even on me as he surveyed the room.

I tried to keep my voice low, so as not to alert the girls or anyone else in the room. <I wanted to talk about what’s happened over the past few days. >

Now he looked at me, a little surprised. <Yes, you’ve done admirably.>

Was he really this dense? Or was he just pretending to not understand?

<You said I wouldn’t be dealing with any of this until we left Seoul. Was that a lie?>

Hyun-suk raised an eyebrow. <You can’t expect me to predict every hiccup that will come our way.>

I was getting frustrated, and it was becoming harder and harder to hold my temper in check. <I understand that, but when you deliberately withhold information from me…> My voice trailed off as I looked for the right words. <That first team was trained. They were _good._ Today was sloppy, amateurish. Are you going to tell me what’s going on? Or am I going to be in the dark about the very job you hired me for?>

Hyun-suk shrugged. <YG has many enemies. Trained men one day, weak gangs the next. You can stop them all the same. My faith in you has been rewarded.>

My anger was growing steadily. <You don’t want to tell me anything? Fine. I don’t care. I don’t need to know what’s going on. I never did. But I am responsible—> I gestured in the direction of the girls. <-For other people’s _lives_. People who have nothing to do with your enemies or anything else. And I can’t keep them safe, I can’t do what you hired me to do, with only half the information.> I was breathing heavily and my voice must have gotten a little too raised, because his men were looking at me apprehensively, sizing me up, no doubt trying to determine who would win in a fight. I already knew. It wasn’t them.

Hyun-suk, to his credit, remained calm and continued looking at me dispassionately. <If you cannot perform the task I hired you for, you can leave. There are other bodyguards. You will still receive a portion of your fee.>

<Yeah. We’ll see,> I said, stalking away, indicating that the conversation was over. I had both begun and ended it, yet I still felt like I was the one over the barrel. He must have known what was going on in my mind. That if I left, the girls would be in the hands of someone less capable, and I didn’t want to be responsible for that.

I resumed my perch on a table and watched Jisoo flash me a thumbs-up as she sashayed behind a camera. I returned the gesture, but the smile on my face was forced. A smart man would leave this situation before it got worse.

I guess I wasn’t as smart as I thought.

\---

My bad mood must have been visible even later, because after the shoot was over and we were on our way back to the house in the car, Lisa reached up to the passenger seat and tapped my shoulder.

<What’s wrong> she asked. <Too boring?>

The other girls had gotten quiet, no doubt to hear my response. I grumbled internally and shook my head. <Headache,> I lied. <Probably from yesterday. Just need some painkillers.>

<Hmm,> said Lisa, and I could tell she wasn’t convinced.

I turned back to them, to see the four staring at me with wide eyes. I couldn’t help but grin, and then Rosé burst out laughing. <You’re so grumpy!> she said. <A bad day? Or are you jealous no one took pictures of you?>

<That must be it,> I said, returning my eyes to the road and our surroundings. <Next time, I want a camera for myself.>

<You’re not a good enough liar,> Jisoo said suddenly, cutting off Rosé’s musical laughter.

<What?> I asked, confused. The statement seemingly came from nowhere, and I had no idea what she meant.

She shifted in her seat, a little uncomfortable that all the attention was now on her. <Modelling and acting. It’s all lying. You’re not good at that.>

Lisa launched into an explanation of what Jisoo meant, of how you needed to present yourself as something you weren’t, but I was only half-listening. I wasn’t a good liar? I had been lying to them since I had met them. Lies of omission, yes, but lies nonetheless. I had lied today, after I had neglected to mention my bathroom showdown to them. Did she know something? That was impossible, right?

I was left to ponder that as we parked and reentered the Blackpink house. It was late, the day having been mostly consumed by the promo work the girls had done at the studio. Lunch and dinner had been served by catering before we had left. It was no wonder I was in a bad mood. I had been left to stew by myself for most of the day.

Jennie and Lisa disappeared up to their room, both clearly exhausted. Rosé claimed that she was starving, so she started to prepare toast in the most animated, excited manner I had ever seen. I couldn’t help but smile as she danced around the kitchen, singing about her soon-to-be toast.

<Do you want any?> she asked me, pausing mid-pirouette.

<I’m okay,> I said softly from the couch. I had continued reading my book, enjoying the quiet, low-lit atmosphere. <You enjoy.>

<I will bring Lisa and Jennie some!> she declared.

I was amazed at how someone so famous could still be so enraptured by something as simple as a piece of toast. It was sweet and there was something important there. Something a lot of people could stand to learn from.

<Actually,> I said, as she opened the fridge to find something for her toast. <You have any drinks in there?> I didn’t usually drink on the job. In fact, I almost never did. But the Blackpink house was safe and I wasn’t really working at the moment. And it had been a difficult twenty-four hours. A beer would go down nicely right now.

Rosé looked at me uncertainly. <We… uh…> She switched to English, her accent ringing clearly. “We don’t drink. Not allowed. Contract stuff, you know? Probably for health reasons. There are worse things, I guess!”

Right. Yeah. I had known that, but in the bluster of the day, I had forgotten.

“Ah, hell. I’m sorry.” I paused. “Do you prefer Rosé, Rosie, or Chaeyoung?”

She beamed, clearly delighted that I had gotten her name. “Or Roseanne! I don’t mind!”

“Enjoy your toast,” I said. “I’m going to get some air.”

“Okay!” she said brightly and left the kitchen, toast in tow.

I collected my book and stepped outside, feeling the cool night air on my face. I closed my eyes and exhaled, feeling the tension of the day wash over me. A flick of a light switch brought on the strings of lights around the small yard, giving it a dull orange glow. I settled into a chair, a long one made of wicker. It was going to start getting cold soon. And not long after that, the tour would be starting. What would that mean for me? For the girls? Would I still be here?

Part of me knew that I would. They were innocent in all this. I could be their buffer.

The other part of me was wondering how I could be so goddamn dumb. This was a death trap, for me and for them. Hyun-suk was hiding things from me, which was his prerogative, but it could very well lead to people getting killed.

It was a real dilemma.

The door opened behind me and Jisoo stepped out. She was carrying something in each hand, but in the low light, it was hard to tell what it was.

She sat down next to me and tucked her legs up underneath her, then reached out to hand one of the objects to me. It took me a second to see that it was some kind of Korean beer. I accepted it with surprise and cracked the lid off using the table in front of us. She followed my lead. I reached out and we clinked the bottles.

<Where’d you get this from?> I asked. She must have overheard me talking to Rosé.

<If I tell you, will you tell me a truth?> she asked, looking at me seriously.

I didn’t answer, which prompted her to continue. <Fine, I’ll go first,> she said. <Did you hit someone today?>

<What? No,> I lied. <Why would you—>

“Bad liar,” she said in English. “You lie to other girls, but you can’t lie to me. I know.”

“Then why did you ask?”

She paused, thinking of her answer. “A test,” she said finally. “For you.”

<Failed it then, didn’t I?> I switched back to Korean out of respect to her. <How did you know?>

<Your knuckles.>

I looked down and saw the redness, the cuts, the sign of a fight. <Can’t hide anything from you, huh?>

<No.>

I tasted the beer. It was perfect—nothing too heavy or high-class. It tasted like they had got it from a corner store, which made it even better after a long day.

<So where did you get this from?>

Jisoo gave me a sneaky grin. <The managers can’t see _everything_. They’re crazy if they think we’re going to follow _all_ those rules.>

I cocked my head. <Aren’t you afraid of YG finding out?>

Jisoo shrugged. <What will they do? Fire us? The worst they can do is get mad.>

I relaxed back on the simple wicker seat, resting my arm on the back of it. <You’re not cold?> I asked, after a moment.

She smiled and reached behind her, pulling a heavy blanket up off the patio and resting it on the seat. <Just in case. Always prepared!>

Even though it was getting a little colder, I felt the stress of the day start to fade away. I had always been good at managing that aspect of my job. I needed to be, or I would have snapped years ago.

<What are you reading?> she asked after a little.

I glanced down at the book, a little embarrassed. The answer would likely come as a surprise to her. <Just an airport romance,> I said. <Cheap paperback. Nothing good.>

She blinked and looked at me with disbelief. <Really? Doesn’t seem like something you would—>

<I know, I know,> I said, taking a sip to cover my embarrassment. <Sometimes I just want to get away from the real world. Just a little. Here and there. You know?>

“I know,” she said softly, and I noticed that she was looking up at the stars. “I know.”  
We enjoyed the night and the fresh air for a little while longer. I casually read a few pages from my novel while Jisoo played a colorful game on her phone, letting out a few small cries of delight when something especially good happened.

Finally, I brought up the elephant in the room.

<About today,> I said. <You’ll keep it to yourself, right? I don’t want to alarm the other girls.>

<Of course,> she answered, without looking up from her game. <It’ll be our secret.>

I relaxed a little then. Jisoo knew things, I could tell. More than she had even let onto me yet. I supposed that was what happened when you were as clever as she was. But the last thing I needed was to upset the rest of the group. Jisoo was calm, almost always it seemed. I trusted her to do what was right for her companions, and for now, our goals were the same.

We sat there together, quietly enjoying the moonlight, until both of us could no longer fight the heaviness of our eyes. I felt satisfied, knowing that even if this road was going to be difficult, I could at least sleep well knowing that was I doing the right thing. They deserved someone who could do right by them, especially in the face of all the secrets being kept from them.

I could be that person. I _would_ be that person.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, as always, for reading! Comments are always appreciated ^_^
> 
> I hope you all watched and enjoyed THE SHOW! Replays start this weekend, so make sure to support out girls!
> 
> I already have my plan for the next chapter, and I'm really looking forward to Oliver's next adventure with our queens!
> 
> Please remember this is a work of fiction, entirely created by me for my own entertainment. The people in the story are not like this in real life. Any mistakes made are mistakes made by me, not by anyone else.


	4. Sneaking Out

_ 2018. _

<Sorry,> I said. <I don’t think I’m understanding.>

The days had slipped into weeks, and we had fallen into something of a routine. This could be bad for my line of work, because it could lead to sloppiness. For me, though, it usually worked differently. I could see the patterns that formed and use them to breed more efficiency. There had been no more attacks. I had devised new routes for the girls to take to certain hotspots in their schedule. They were safe. They were happy.

And the tour was starting soon.

Technically, of course, there were only two 2018 dates. The bulk of the tour would begin in January of next year. It was a big deal because their first full Japanese album would release soon. Which, believe it or not, would apparently sell in many other countries than just Japan. They explained some of their business deals to me. I picked up what I could, but I didn’t stress over it. That wasn’t my part of the operation.

Our nerves were increasing as the tour approached and their schedule became more and more frantic. The hours of practicing began to extend, even more than before, and I wondered how they kept it up. I saw how hard they worked, every day, with little to no time off. Lately, they would rehearse from the moment they got to the studio, almost until the moment they went to sleep. It reminded me of being back in the military. It was exhausting to watch.

And now, they had just asked me something that I was certain I had misunderstood.

<Well,> said Lisa. <It’s hard to explain.>

<Not really,> said Jisoo. <It’s very simple.>

Rosé said nothing, simply swung her legs as she sat on the counter and watched. Jennie laughed from the couch, apparently amused by my expression.

<You know I can’t do that,> I said. <You… know that.>

<You don’t know everything!> cried Jisoo, raising a finger triumphantly. <You think you do, but you don’t!>

<Apparently,> I said, leaning against the wall. <Run this by me again.>

Jennie sighed. <She’s being difficult on purpose. It’s what she does.>

I shrugged. <Sorry, can’t help you if you don’t explain.>

Jisoo was just giving me a devilish grin, so Jennie took it upon herself to explain. <So, you’re right. Technically we aren’t supposed to really go anywhere without YG knowing. Or our managers.> She switched to English, to explain what I assumed was going to be either complicated or messy. “But YG doesn’t know everything.”

“They’re watching you, right?” I asked, looking around nervously. “Didn’t they record a show of you guys in here?”

“Yeah,” said Jennie. “But not anymore. They can watch, but that’s about it. And they can only watch common areas, too. We negotiated a little more privacy.”

“Fine. Great. So you want me to do what, exactly?”

Jennie rolled her eyes at Jisoo. “Sometimes we… sneak out. Usually only one or two at a time. All of us would just create too much attention, you know?”

I looked at Jisoo. “You want me to sneak you out, then?”

I understood now what she had meant by <Oliver, I want you to take me out.> The phrasing had caught me off guard, and then she had been laughing too much at my confusion to explain. And then she had been enjoying my ignorance too much to correct me.

<Just for a little,> she said, more seriously now. <We are leaving soon. We will be so busy and gone! I want to enjoy home.>

I considered the rest of the girls. <You don’t want to go?>

Rosé shrugged. “We’ll have Christmas with our families, probably. Jisoo just… really wants to get out.”

Jisoo smiled sheepishly. <Going a little crazy.>

I still had more questions, though. <You know a way out that won’t show on the cameras?>

Jisoo nodded.

Well, maybe I really only had one question.

The thing was, I knew that I should say no. The smart answer to deny this crazy request. There was no reason for it—and taking Jisoo out onto the streets of Seoul was madness. Even if it was just her and no one else, for someone in my position, that was a security nightmare. The correct thing to do would be to say no and be done with it.

And yet…

I was still considering it. It was idiotic of me, but the fact I hadn’t shot her down immediately proved it. I had two reasons to still be thinking about it. The first was my anger at Hyun-suk. A few weeks had gone by, and I still wasn’t over our conversation. We had only spoken a handful of times since then, but all the conversation had been noncommittal on both ends. He was dedicated to his strategy of sharing nothing with me, to my frustration. This, in a childish way, would be a good way to get back at him. To show him that while I did work for him, he didn’t own me. And he didn’t own the girls either.

The second reason was simpler and more surprising to me, once I realized what it was. I just… thought that Jisoo deserved a night out. I saw daily how hard she worked. And if this was to be her brief moment of respite, well, who was I to deny it?

She must have seen me hesitating, because her eyes lit up and she gave me the textbook “puppy-dog eyes.” <Please, Ollie?>

“Well…”

She moved a little closer, looking up at me, and I realized, perhaps for the first time, how small she really was. She seemed much taller than the rest of the girls, perhaps because of her attitude, but that wasn’t true at all. <Ollie, pleeeeease?>

<We won’t be going far?> I asked.

<Of course not!> she celebrated, as if I had already said yes.

<And where do you want to go?> I asked, trying to remain stern and serious. It was hard in the face of such elation.

<Food,> she said immediately. <Maybe somewhere fun. Keep it simple! No one will know me.>

I sighed and the girls all exchanged a knowing glance. They knew that I had been convinced, maybe against my better judgment.

<Alright,> I said. <Don’t make me regret this.>

Jisoo squealed and ran out of the room, heading up to the room she shared with Rosé. <I’ll just quick get ready! Meet you out back!>

She was gone before I could ask her any questions or have any second thoughts.

I turned to Rosé, hoping that she could offer the answers that I was seeking.

“The way out is in the backyard,” she said. “We found out that there’s a little camera blindspot. Just enough for us to sneak out, don’t worry. Nothing major.”

My nervousness at such a statement must have shown, because she hurried to calm me down. “Really, it’s alright. We’ve been doing it for a while now.”

Lisa looked at me with a grin. “But you might want to change.”

I looked down at my outfit, confused. “What? Why? What’s wrong with this?”

I was still wearing my suit from the day, and while it was a little rumpled, I didn’t see any reason why I wouldn’t be able to wear it out. Not that I minded the criticism—I certainly wasn’t one to care about what people thought of my clothes, but if Lisa was suggesting it, there was probably an actual reason.

“It’s a bit… much,” Lisa said. “It’s good for us! Don’t misunderstand!”

I cut her off by raising a hand. “It’s really okay.”

“But you want to be lowkey. Not too lowkey, just enough.”

“Right,” I said. “That’s a bit of a problem. I mostly have work clothes, since I’m mostly… working.”

Lisa and Jennie glanced at each other. Rosé saw their expressions and gave them a warning look. “No, no, no, he does not have time for—”

“How about a make-over?” Jennie asked, a twinkle in her eye. I could tell by the look on her face that I didn’t have much of a say in the answer.

\---

Rosé had been right, though. There wasn’t much time. So Jennie and Lisa hurried as best they could in an attempt to get me looking right for a night out on the town. I protested, claiming that if it was as easy as Jisoo said, then why did we have to do so much prep?

“Because it’s fun!” said Lisa, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Duh!”

I was sitting on my bed while they were tearing through my clothing. Rosé had gone back to her room with Jisoo, apparently having enough excitement for the night. Fortunately, Jennie and Lisa were experts at clothing, and it didn’t take them long to pick out a few choices.

“Ooh!” Jennie squealed, seeing a particular jacket that she liked. I didn’t wear it often—I didn’t have much reason to, but it was a stiff, black material with shiny black buttons, usually left open. It was fitted, and I would apparently be wearing it with a black and grey ensemble that Lisa had assembled.

“I didn’t even know I owned those,” I said, looking at the pants, which looked a bit tighter than what I might have been used to. And were those… boots? Yeah, they were. I definitely didn’t own those.

“Gifts from YG!” Jennie said. “They give us clothing all the time. I guess they left some for you too!”

“Alright,” I replied. “I’ll go get changed.”

I stepped into the bathroom and hurriedly changed into the outfit that they had picked out for me. After changing, I had to admit, they had done well. I looked like a civilian, but I still felt perfectly capable of being dangerous.

I opened up the bathroom door and shrugged, looking out at the two girls. “Acceptable?”  
There was a pause as they examined me, and for the briefest of moments, I thought I saw Jennie blush. Then Lisa nodded. “Acceptable. Head downstairs, we’ll get Jisoo.”

They left my room before I even had a chance to say anything else. I shook my head and chuckled. They were certainly an interesting group.

Before I went back down to leave, I grabbed a few things. Beyond my wallet and phone, I also made sure to be armed. I didn’t want to bring my main choice of handgun, which would be too big and showy. Instead, I opted for a smaller selection, that could be easily concealed but still deadly if necessary. I imagined (and hoped) that it wouldn’t be. But I had learned the importance of always being prepared.

Soon, I was downstairs, waiting for Jisoo to join me. I heard giggles and footsteps from above, and a moment later, Jennie and Lisa were running down the steps. “She’s coming!” Lisa said, before peeling away in the other direction with Jennie. I was confused. Where were they going? Why weren’t they staying? What…?

And then I saw Jisoo and I swear to you, my breath actually caught in my throat.

I had seen her before, of course, looking stunning. I had seen her model and dance. I had seen her in videos and in photographs. I had seen her sitting next to me, enjoying a beer and the starlit sky. But I had never seen her like this.

What made it so impressive was that she was dressed casually, just like I was. She was wearing a pair of jeans that I _knew_ cost more than anyone would ever guess, along with a fitted shirt that showed off both her neckline and midriff, allowing her glowing, milky skin to be seen by all. Her make-up was done lightly too, just enough to draw attention to the soft symmetry of her features, the roundness of her lips.

I forgot to speak for a moment. I honestly did.

Until she gave me a small smile and said, “Ready?”

Her small, quiet voice snapped me out of my reverie and I noticed that she was a bit taller than usual—likely due to the rather fetching boots she was currently wearing.

“Ready,” I said. “Just show me where to go.”

Jisoo led me out the back door, and before it closed behind us, I could have sworn I heard Lisa and Jennie whispering to each other.

\---

<Where do we go then?> I asked, feeling a little stupid. I couldn’t believe that I hadn’t figured this out before they had told me about it.

Jisoo pointed towards the back corner of the yard. <If you boost me, then climb, we’ll be in an alley. Then we just need a cab!>

Sounded easy enough.

I gave Jisoo the boost she needed, getting her over the wall, again, shocked at how light she was. Then I grabbed and pulled myself over, which was easy enough, given what I did on a daily basis.

And then… we were standing in an alley in Seoul, and it was like the magic of the Blackpink house had faded and been left behind in another world. Jisoo looked around and then looked at me and laughed nervously.

I couldn’t believe how easy it had been. I wondered how the girls must have felt when they discovered such a thing. The freedom must have been intoxicating for them.

<A cab?> I said, as if to remind her of what our goal was.

She nodded and pulled out her phone, they dialed a number and had a hasty conversation. <This way,> she said when she was done, leading me down the alley and…

Out onto a street. A busy, well-lit street, with civilians everywhere, couples laughing and talking to together. Night life. The city came alive at night and I had just never truly seen it before. The streets were lit with neon and the chatter of the crowd was everywhere, sweeping us along the sidewalk.

I was afraid momentarily that I would lose sight of Jisoo until she reached down and grabbed my hand. Then, it was like the hum and buzz of the crowd vanished, and even though we were still surrounded, it was just the two of us. Her cool, small hand gripped mine as she led me through the mass of people, to the cab that was waiting at the next street corner.

She turned momentarily to look back at me before we got in, and I saw so much joy in her eyes that for that second, I no longer cared if I had done the wrong thing by letting her go out. Who cared about Hyun-suk? She was happy, happier than I had ever seen her, and that was all that really mattered.

We got in the cab and shut the door behind us to be met by the quiet sound of the engine and the soft music that was playing. I realized now for the first time how noisy the crowd had been.

<Where to?> the driver asked.

Jisoo gave a name that I didn’t recognize and only a moment later, we were pulling away, driving the streets of nighttime Seoul, on an adventure that I had never expected.

The driver talked to Jisoo as we drove, and I only half-listened. For some reason, it felt like I was living in another world, a world where I wasn’t a bodyguard, and she wasn’t an idol. We were just two people, out on the town for the night. It felt right.

We were at our destination soon. I reached up to pay the driver, but Jisoo stopped my hand with a smile, offering the man cash. <Keep the change,> she said before we left.

<What was that about?> I asked as the cab pulled away.

<I made you come with me,> she said. <The least I can do is pay.>

It bothered me more than I was willing to admit, probably because I was used to working in a profession that essentially meant I was serving other people all the time. But she seemed happy to provide this, so I let it go without saying anything else.

Our first stop appeared to be a trendy restaurant, though calling it a restaurant may have been incorrect. It looked like a cross between a bar, a café, and… a bookstore? I wasn’t sure how else to describe it. It was small, dimly lit, with a neon tinge to the wall and corners, no doubt caused by LED strips. There were small tables throughout, and the walls were lined with shelves of books. It managed to be both quaint and modern at the same time. It fit Jisoo perfectly.

<What do you think?> she asked as we approached.

<I’ve never seen anything like it,> I said honestly. <But do you think we’ll get a spot?>

Jisoo smiled confidently. <We will.>

She was right. The employee who was seating people seemed to recognize her. I wondered if she had perhaps given the establishment a generous bribe in the past, but she put that thought to rest when she turned to me as we were headed to our table and said, <Being nice pays off sometimes.>  
It was really that simple.

We were seated in the back corner, far enough away that in the low lighting, I thought it would be next to impossible for anyone to recognize us. Not that anyone would expect Jisoo from Blackpink to be sitting with an anonymous American in a small establishment at night.

<What can I get you and…?> The server looked at me questioningly.

<My boyfriend,> said Jisoo smoothly, without looking up from the menu. <Can you give us a few minutes?>

The waiter gave a slight bow and left, leaving me looking at Jisoo questioningly. <I’m your what?> I asked.

She shrugged. <No one will think I’m Jisoo if I have a boyfriend.> She looked back down, but I caught the smile on her face, and I knew that she was messing with me. She had probably just said it to make me uncomfortable. Well, I wasn’t going to let her win that one unchallenged.

<Fair enough,> I said, looking back down at the menu. <So what are you thinking?>

She named a bunch of dishes that I had never heard of—for someone who was so well-travelled, my knowledge of Korean culinary was limited.

<I’m paying,> I said, before she managed to get any other words out.

<What? Why?>

<Because I’m your boyfriend,> I answered with a roguish grin. <That’s how that works, right?>

Jisoo sighed in despair as the waiter returned to take our orders.

\---

There was soft music playing, a kind of mix between hip-hop beats with jazz, and I noticed Jisoo tapping her fingers.

<So what’s it like?> I asked

<What is what like?>

She looked back at me across the table, the flame from the small candle throwing shadows onto her face, and I was again taken aback by how simply beautiful she was. It was a kind of classic beauty, a freshness and innocence that was so rarely seen.

<Being no one,> I said. <Tonight you don’t have to be anyone. You can just… exist.>

She sighed happily. <It’s wonderful. I dream about it sometimes. I dream that I can just walk around. Talk to people. Go wherever I want, any time.>

I watched her, and saw a glimpse of sadness pass over her face.

<Do you miss that?>

She didn’t answer right away. Instead, she just sat there, stirring the straw in her glass of ice water.

<I don’t know,> she said finally. <It’s been so long. Even when we were in training, we were treated differently.>

<I guess being out here must be pretty nice for you then.>

She gave me a sad smile. <I wasn’t pretending to be excited.>

<I’m sorry,> I said suddenly. <I didn’t want to upset you.>

She cocked her head. <I’m not upset. It’s just the way things are. I try to not get upset over things I can’t change. What about you? What do you miss?>

The question took me aback, because, just like her, I wasn’t used to talking about myself. In fact, it had been a long time since I had engaged in a conversation about my hopes or dreams. My work was my life. My life was my work. I figured that there would be time in the future to worry about everything else.

But… now that time was here.

I paused to gather my thoughts. Jisoo didn’t prompt me or rush me, she just continued to examine me with that calm, steady look that she typically wore.

Eventually, I spoke.

<The strangest thing was that I never…> I stopped and saw her looking at me with concern, and I realized that my eyes had filled up with tears without even me even noticing.

<What’s wrong?> she asked.

I wiped my eyes, stunned by the turn of events. <Nothing.> I said. Then, in English, “I don’t know. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” She offered me a smile. “Take… your time.”

I took a drink of water and steadied myself. Where had that come from? I had no idea, but I hadn’t been expecting that.

<The strange thing is that I never wanted this to be my life,> I said. <It just sort of happened. And then I was just really good at it, and I guess it kind of stuck. No one has asked me that in a long time.>

<Do you regret it?>

I thought back to all the violence, all the death and killing that had come as a result of my chosen profession. There was plenty that I wish I could have changed, but I wasn’t sure if there was anything that I regretted.

<I don’t think so. I think I’m pretty good with who I am.>

<But who do you want to be?>

I was saved from answering that question as the food came, and Jisoo let out a delighted squeal. I smiled to myself as we began to eat. It had been a long time since I had experienced a night like this. I wondered how long it had been for her.

\---

When we finished, Jisoo really did let me pay the check, much to my surprise. She didn’t seem very happy about it, but at least she let it happen. <Where next?> I asked.

<Can we just walk?> she asked. <I don’t want this to end yet.>

I understood why. Tomorrow, we would be back to the daily grind of life as Blackpink. Tonight, she could just be Jisoo, a young woman walking the streets of Seoul.

I agreed, and we got up to leave. As we walked through the building to the entrance, she reached out a hand and traced her finger down the sides of the bookshelves that we passed, a look of wonder on her face. Even though she had been here before, it still amazed her. I admired and even envied that.

We made it back on the street and were almost immediately swept up by all the people traversing the area in front of the restaurant. Jisoo started to walk, in seemingly no direction at all, so I just followed close behind her, making sure that we didn’t get split up.

I didn’t have to worry. She saw that I was lagging behind and slowed down enough so that I could draw next to her. She reached out and took my hand again, smiling a little.

I knew, right then, that I should draw away. That I should extract my hand from hers, put a little distance between us. Let her enjoy her evening by herself, with me there as a guard and chaperone.

But I didn’t. Just because I knew it was the right thing didn’t mean I wanted to do it. And I didn’t. Her hand stayed inside mine, small and cool against my skin. She squeezed gently and I saw the wind pick up a strand of her hair and blow it out of my place. She wasn’t looking at me; she was looking all around her in wonder.

<Can we go in here?> she said, after we had been walking for a little. She stopped and directed my attention to a small nightclub in a side street, that seemed to be attracting the attention of people who were dressed similarly to us.

<Sure,> I said. <You know it?>

<No. It’ll be new for both of us!> She said this like it was a positive thing, and I tried to ignore the fact that venturing into uncharted territory with someone I was supposed to protect felt a lot like stepping into oncoming traffic.

Again, I should have said no. I should have told her to stick to the familiar places, where she would at least know the exits. Instead, I let her pull me ahead, all the way up to the bouncer.

<My boyfriend will pay the cover!> she said excitedly, leaning in on my shoulder.

I gave a grin that I hoped wasn’t too awkward and handed the bouncer the required amount of won, along with a little extra. He looked at us unblinkingly, no doubt thinking that we were no different than the hundreds of other couples he saw on a regular basis.

Fortunately, he didn’t pat me down. I supposed that we looked innocent enough. A rookie mistake, but then again, I wasn’t there to hurt anyone.

The inside of the club was simple, even a bit dingy, but the occupants didn’t care. The music was loud and the bass was pulsing, with an array of lights flashing on every corner of the ceiling. There was a DJ playing music that I didn’t recognize, but that Jisoo seemed to approve of. She continued to lead me in, dancing a bit as she went.

Then, she leaned up and pulled my head down a bit, and for a second my heart stopped, thinking—was she really going to—

And then she whispered in my ear, <Buy me a drink?> and pulled away just as suddenly, giving me big, pleading eyes.

I felt a wave of relief and even a little bit of… was that really disappointment? I chided myself. How stupid was I? What was wrong with me tonight?  
<I’ll be right back,> I said. <Anything special?>

<Something strong.>

I laughed. <As long as you don’t get yourself in trouble.>

I stepped over to the bar and leaned across, signaling the bartender. <Something fun,> I said. <For the lady.>

He winked at me and started tossing around cups and the paraphernalia he would need to make the requested drink. I could see him putting soju in and mixing it with a few other liquids that I couldn’t make out, given the Korean writing and the low-lighting.

When he was finished, he handed me the drink, a delightful bright orange, and a shot. <Extra soju,> he said. <On the house. Come back soon, okay?>

I tipped him extra, realizing that he probably wasn’t used to Americans coming into this small joint and speaking fluent Korean. Squeezing through the crowd, I made my way back to Jisoo, who was dancing by herself, her eyes closed and her body moving almost unconsciously, flowing freely with the music. It was a beautiful thing to see and I hated to interrupt.

I didn’t need to though because she seemed to sense I was there. <Ah!> she said, eagerly accepting the drink. <What’s that?> She indicated the shot.

<Extra,> I said. <Want some soju?>

<That’s for you,> she said, sipping her drink and starting to dance a little again. <C’mon.>

<Jisoo, I can’t. I’m working.>

<Not tonight!> she said, dancing a little closer. <One shot. I don’t want it. You don’t want to waste it, right?>

That was the moment when I realized I needed to make a decision. Was I going to do the right, responsible thing? Was I going to resist what I thought my heart was whispering to me? Or was I going to do something monumentally stupid, on so many levels?

I looked at the small glass of clear liquid in my hand. I thought about the conversations we had shared. About the night we had experienced so far.

And I made my choice.

The liquid burned a bit going down, but it was smoother than vodka and it brought a smile to my face to see Jisoo’s surprise at me actually doing the shot.

<You did it!>

<Of course I did, I have to keep our cover, right?>

<Dance with me!> she demanded, leaving me no time to recover. I set the empty shot glass down on a nearby ledge and followed her out onto the dance floor, trying for once to just be myself and not a mask or a false identity.

I had danced, of course. Overseas, undercover, pretending to someone else. But it had been a long time since I had just gone and done it with someone else for fun. I had no hope whatsoever of matching Jisoo’s skill or energy, so instead, I just… let go.

We danced and I felt the soju hit me just a little, just enough for a touch of dizziness and a little loosening of the inhibitions. Enough to cheer when Jisoo sang along or executed a move that was especially impressive. Enough to not pull away when she drew closer. Enough to smile and laugh as the time flew by and her drink slowly disappeared from the glass.

The truth was that I just felt comfortable with her. It was funny—because when we had met, she had immediately been distrustful of me. For good reason, too. I wondered how she would feel if she knew that there were still things that I was keeping from her. She could never know what my agreement with YG was, or what I would be willing to do in the name of my job.

In the moment, though, none of those things were on my mind. All I was thinking about was the sound of the music, the pounding of the beat all around us and the closeness of her body to me. When had we gotten so close to each other? I didn’t know and I didn’t want to think about it any more beyond that.

And then we were touching, her body pressed lightly into mine, as if we were trying to test the limits, trying to see how far we could take this foolish exercise.

_This needs to stop._

But I wasn’t willing to make it stop, at least not yet. Something just felt... right.

The choice was taken out of my hands though, when she reached down and took my hand and pulled me toward her, as she turned and headed towards the side of the club, where there were doors that led out to a small patio area. She was smiling, or at least I thought she was from the quick glimpse I got of her face before all I could see was the back of her head.

We were out in the open air only a moment later and I was amazed at the difference in temperature between the inside and outside. It couldn’t have been _that_ cold outside, but leaving the building felt like walking out of a fire. I was callously returned to reality, and I wasn’t sure how I felt about it.

<Are you having fun?> she asked me, leaning on the railing and looking out into the parking lot and the streets of Seoul.

<I am,> I said carefully, not wanting to commit that much more verbally. <What about you?>

She turned to look at me then, and she didn’t need to speak for me to know the answer. I saw pure joy, pure freedom, and I wondered what it would be like to feel like that.

<Ollie...> she said, her voice trailing off. Her eyes were locked on mine, and suddenly, I didn’t feel the cold at all. I didn’t feel anything other than the pull that was drawing me towards her, an irresistible magnetic force that ignoring my instincts, ignoring my thoughts, ignoring everything I knew.

She was leaning up to me (or was she?) and I was bending down to her (or was I?), but it was so slowly, so steadily, that I wasn’t sure if it was real or all in my mind.

I got my answer only a moment later when our lips brushed against each other, so faintly that at first I couldn’t tell if it had happened. But then I could taste her, and I knew that this was real, that we had done it, that...

That things had gone too far.

I pulled away quickly, maybe too quickly, because for the briefest moment, I saw a look of hurt and surprise on her face. Then it was gone, as if it had never been there at all.

<Jisoo, I’m sorry, I just—>

<You don’t have to say anything. I know.>

But did she? She couldn’t really know, right? Or maybe she knew all too well, seeing as how her life was even more harshly controlled by a YG contract. I decided to tell her. I owed her that much at least.

<Hyun-suk told me, he said I couldn’t get... involved. With any of you. And well, you have a contract too.>

She looked at me blankly, and the spark of joy on her face was gone. I felt terrible. Not because I thought she wanted me that much—I was well aware that she could have any man she wanted, and that I was just the one who happened to be closest. No, the reason I felt so bad was because the freedom that she had been radiating, the elation that I hadn’t seen on her since meeting her had vanished.

<I know,> she said. <You’re right. We shouldn’t.>

We stood there in the night for a little bit longer before she said in that same flat tone, <I think I’d like to go back now.>

My heart sank. Returning her to the Blackpink house would make it feel like the magic of the night was over. It would be admitting that we were still owned by reality. It would be like handing Jisoo back over to the machine that her life had been run by for years.

<Are you sure?> I asked. <We still have some more time.>  
She looked at me then, and this time I saw a hint of pity in her face. <I’m tired,> she said. <I just want to sleep.>

I didn’t have much to say in response to that. It was her night and her decision and I wasn’t going to stand in the way of what she wanted.

_Yes, you are. And you’re going to stand in the way of what you wanted, too. You just did._

I could still taste her on my lips. I wondered how long that memory would linger.

\---

We didn’t say much to each other on the ride home. She didn’t look uncomfortable, just... defeated. Like she had realized that no matter how much magic she tried to inject into her life, she was always going to return to the same place, over and over, until her time with YG was over.

We reentered the same way we left, with me giving her a slight boost to help her over the wall. I followed her over and was a little surprised to see that she was waiting for me on the other side, just simply waiting to see if I would make it down safely. We headed back up to the house together.

The lights were off, no doubt because the rest of the girls were already asleep. We entered as quietly as we could, slipping inside and closing the door with great gentleness and care.

She started to head upstairs without saying anything else, and I almost reached out to touch her shoulder, to stop her, but decided against it. Instead, I just whispered, <Wait.>

She stopped and looked at me with that terrible blank expression. I worried I would never see her look at me any other way.

<I just wanted to say…>

But what did I want to say? There was so much I wanted to say, and I couldn’t even begin to decipher a fraction of it. I wanted to ask her if she regretted anything. I wanted to tell her that I didn’t. I wanted to apologize for going too far and for not going far enough.

<I’m really glad we went,> I said, aware that simple sentence wasn’t even close to being enough, but not knowing what else to say.

<I am too,> she said, and she smiled at me, though I would have been lying if I had said the smile wasn’t a sad one. <Goodnight, Ollie.>

<Goodnight.>

I watched her walk up to her room and I cursed myself for the series of stupid decisions that had led me to this point. What had I done?

\---

As expected, I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t even bring myself to go up to my room, almost afraid of the thoughts that the darkness would bring. I hadn’t been in a position like this for years and it was not something that I had practice dealing with. Maybe I was making it out to be a bigger deal than it actually was… but I didn’t think so.

Instead, I stayed downstairs, listlessly staring out a kitchen window and replaying the events of the night over and over in my mind.

I was so caught up in my thoughts that I didn’t even hear the approach of Rosé until she was almost right behind, seated on the edge of the kitchen island.

“What the hell happened?”

I spun, shocked that she had managed to creep up on me like that. “What?”

“Don’t lie to me. Something happened.”

_Damn. She must have seen Jisoo come in._

Of course she did. They shared a room.

I had never seen Rosé like this. She wasn’t mad, not quite, but she was approaching it with every second that passed. She was glaring daggers at me, and I realized for the first time that even though she seemed like the smallest of the group, she was actually the tallest.

But even with the glare that she was giving me, I wasn’t about to tell the whole story.

“I don’t know what you mean,” I said.

Rosé shook her head. “Do I look stupid to you? I saw Jisoo’s face. What happened?”

I turned back to the window. “You’ll have to ask her.”

Rosé hopped off the island and stormed up next to me. “Do _not_ turn away from! I am talking to you!”

“I’m your bodyguard,” I said flatly. “I did my job. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

She didn’t respond right away. When she did, her voice was more controlled, but now she sounded defeated. “I can’t believe you’re just going to lie to me like that. After what we all went through together.”

“I’ve only ever just done my job.”

“I thought you were better than this.” There was disgust in her voice. “If you hurt her…”

I turned on her. “If I _hurt_ her? What do you think I am? I am a professional and my _one_ purpose for being here is to keep you all safe. That’s it. I work for Hyun-suk and YG.”

She shook her head. “You’re so full of shit. Why did you go with her tonight then, huh? If you’re just a bodyguard, then you would have stayed here and made her stay, too.”

I had no response to that because she was right. “I…”

“Whatever.” She almost started to walk away, but something made me stop her.

“Wait.”

She turned back, one eyebrow raised, her smooth face and clear eyes seemingly looking right through me. She said nothing. Her face said it all.

“It was my fault,” I said. “It was stupid and amateurish, and it shouldn’t have happened. We got a little too close. That was all. It was just for a second. And it won’t happen again.” That was a lie, though, wasn’t it? It hadn’t just been for a second. It had been for the whole night.

“You kissed,” Rosé said flatly, and it wasn’t a question.

I didn’t have to answer for her to know that she was right.

“What are you going to do about it?” Rosé asked.

“Nothing. You can’t tell anyone else. Jisoo can’t and won’t. And you know why. There are so many reasons. It was a mistake.”

Rosé looked at me hard, and then sighed. “What if it wasn’t?”

“It was.”

“Yeah. I know. But imagine if it wasn’t? And we could just… be happy, all of us, any way we wanted?”

I leaned against the kitchen counter. “You’re not happy?”

“I am. Most of the time. But… sometimes I start thinking. And when I go home to my family in a few days, I’m going to do a lot of thinking. About what might be, what could be. If only…”  
“… you weren’t Blackpink,” I finished.

“Yeah.”

I shook my head. “She pretty much said the same thing.”

What Rosé did next stunned me. Without any hesitation, she crossed the few feet between us and threw her arms around, giving me a tight hug. After a second of stunned confusion, I returned the hug, feeling the warmth of her slim body against me.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “We’re all just part of someone else’s game, aren’t we?”

“Yeah. I guess we are.”

She left after that, leaving me alone with my thoughts. I felt scattered, tossed to the wind, not sure what to do or what to think next. Instead, I tried to imagine a life where I was just another person, caught in the rush of the world, living just like everyone else did.

For a while, I could almost see it.


	5. We Need to Talk




I wish I could say that after that fateful night, things went back to normal. But they didn’t, not really. I didn’t expect them to, and unfortunately, my expectations were met. Preparations were well underway for the start of the In Your Area World Tour. Between the rehearsals, the promos for the Japanese album, and the general craziness of the Blackpink lifestyle, quiet moments were few and far between as those first two dates approached.

Jisoo and I barely spoke outside of what was absolutely necessary. Things were strained between us now, and I was kicking myself for several reasons. I was kicking myself because I had kissed her. I was kicking myself because I _hadn’t_ kissed her.

On the bright side, it seemed like Jennie and Lisa had no idea what anything had occurred at all. That made me feel a little better, even if Rosé knew everything. She didn’t seem to harbor any hard feelings towards me. We had been spending some of our downtime together, not doing much of anything beyond watching TV. She helped me with my Korean a bit too, which was getting stronger every day.

But the truth was that there hardly was any downtime. The girls’ schedule was absurd. They spent the majority of each day working, passing out late at night, only to do it all over again. On more than one occasion, I had actually carried Rosé up to her room after she had fallen asleep on the couch. The first time, she had been incredibly embarrassed, but I assured her that rescuing clients from prone positions was actually a common part of my job.

After that, she didn’t mind so much,

As far as Lisa and Jennie went, I got along with them fine. They respected my position, and I found myself admiring their talents on a daily basis. How could I not? Anyone with eyes could see how dedicated and driven they were. Lisa was always friendly, but I found it hard to connect with her. Jennie and I spoke a bit less than I did with the other girls (barring Jisoo), but we would always have that moment after the first attack. It had connected us in a way that I hadn’t expected. And I don’t think she had either.

And that was the crux of the situation, really. Everything that was happening to me, everything that I was experiencing and feeling was so far outside of what I was used to. I hadn’t been prepared for any of it, and maybe that was my fault. Maybe that was what Hyun-suk had wanted. If the man was as smart as he seemed to be, it wouldn’t surprise me at all if his goal had been to get me attached to the girls so that I wouldn’t quit, even after I discovered that there were secrets being kept from me.

What made it worse was that it didn’t matter. It made no difference if I knew what he was doing or not. It had worked. I wasn’t going to walk away now. I couldn’t.

The whole thing was making me feel vaguely uncomfortable for a number of reasons. First of all, I didn’t like these new emotions that were cropping up. It had been a long time since I had lived a life that had even put me in a position to feel those kinds of things, and I didn’t know how to handle it. The other thing that was making me feel off was the situation with Jisoo. I wanted to set things back on track between us, but instead, a cold, icy silence was the only thing that seemed to be there.

I knew that I should be grateful for that, because it would make my professionalism easier to maintain. I just couldn’t help but remember the blissful expression on Jisoo’s face as we had explored downtown Seoul together. I wanted to bring that feeling back, and I didn’t know how to.

There wasn’t time to work it out anyway. We were too busy. The tour was beginning in Seoul, in the Olympic Gymnastics Arena, and the amount of work to do was astronomical. There were security plans to go over, contingencies to cover, and of course, the girls were rehearsing day and night.

But it didn’t feel real until the night before the show, after the day’s rehearsal had ended and we were all back in the house together. I had made a point to avoid as much of the rehearsals as possible, looking forward to seeing the show with fresh eyes. I knew the layout of the arena and the positioning of the girls, of course, so if something were to go wrong, I would be able to take care of it.

Hopefully, nothing would happen.

The energy in the house was tense, the girls trying to play it cool, even though they were all clearly quite nervous. Jisoo was playing a game on her phone, Lisa was practicing some moves in the kitchen, Jennie was texting someone, and Rosé was sitting next to me, snacking on some sort of Korean health food that I didn’t recognize.

<You’re going to do great,> I was saying to Rosé in an attempt to calm her down. Her eyes had a wide, nervous look to them, and I couldn’t blame her. This was going to be a crowd of 20,000 people. Had they performed for groups like that before? Yeah. But it was still 20,000 people.

<Yeah,> she said munching away. <But what if I don’t? What then?>

I smiled lightly. <All those people are just going to be happy to see you. You don’t have to worry about a thing.>

<But I am worried!>

Jennie looked up at Rosé with an understanding smile. “Oh, Rosie Posie. It’s always the same thing with you. You’re going to kill it. You’re their queen!”

“I mean, maybe, but like...” She switched to Korean. <You have Solo! Jisoo has her song and Lisa has her dance break! I’m just singing a bunch of songs that no one cares about.>

<If that was true,> chimed in Lisa from the kitchen, <I don’t think that you’d be part of Blackpink. You’re going to kill it, like you always do! Isn’t she, Jisoo?>

Jisoo looked up from her phone. She had been so absorbed in her game that she hadn’t been listening at all. <Huh? I mean... uh, yes. Of course.>

Rosé laughed, at least slightly calmed.

<You’re going to do great,> I said. <And you know I wouldn’t just say that. Not really my style.>

Rosé gave me a grateful smile. <I’m glad you’re here, Ollie.>

At that, Jisoo let out an audible huff and then got off the couch and stormed out of the room. We could hear her stomping up the stairs, presumably heading for her bedroom.

Lisa stopped her casual practice and gave Jennie a confused look. “What was that about?” The question seemed to be directed at anyone who might have an answer.

I, of course, did have an answer. So did Rosé, though we were both staying conspicuously silent about it.

“You know, she _has_ been acting kind of weird,” said Jennie.

And then I understood why they were talking in English. It was for my benefit. It was because they wanted me to understand perfectly. Sure, Rosé had never said anything to them, but they weren’t stupid either. They must have drawn a connection between Jisoo’s standoffishness and our... night out.

“I don’t know,” said Rosé, in a very unconvincing manner. “She seems the same to me.”

I had to fight against the impulse to bury my head in my hands. All that talk about not telling anyone... and for what? Jennie and Lisa had figured it out right away. Of course they had. I supposed that if anyone had to know, they were the two most harmless individuals. They wouldn’t want Jisoo to get in trouble anymore than I would, and would want to avoid the spotlight just as much.

They were also both trying very hard to not look at me, so much so that it was painfully obvious.

“You guys are not good liars,” I said, sighing. My tone was resigned. I looked down at the ground, then back up at Jennie on the other side of the room. “Just ask me whatever you wanted to ask.”

Jennie blushed a little, then recovered, as if she realized that she had nothing to be embarrassed about. “Well... okay. What happened? She hasn’t been the same.”

Rosé shot me an apologetic look, but I shook my head at her, smiling gently. “It’s okay,” I told the slim woman. “I know you didn’t say anything.”  
Lisa bounced into the room and plopped down next to Jennie, her face beaming and her eyes wide. “Chaeyoung! You knew something?” Her voice was filled with fake scandal, but I could tell it was making Rosé feel bad anyway.

“She was just doing what I asked her to,” I said. “And... nothing happened. Not really. It was just a long night. Things went a little... pear-shaped at the end.”

Jennie looked confused. “Pear... shaped?”

<Things got weird,> I clarified.

“Ohhh,” Lisa said. “I understand.”  
“Do you?” I asked.

Lisa shrugged. “I think you should go and talk to her.”

I scratched my head. “She was pretty clear that was a dead-end. I don’t know if that’s a great idea.”

Rosé poked at me with her foot from the other end of the couch we were sitting on. “C’mon. You’ll have the whole upstairs to yourself. Just go talk. What’s the worst that could happen?”

“It’s Jisoo,” I grumbled. “She could probably kick my ass.”

Lisa found that hilarious for some reason, but I was inclined to listen to Rosé. She was trying to be a good friend, at least. And she knew more about the situation than everyone else.

<I just want things to be okay,> I said. <You all have enough to worry about right now without this being added to it.>

Jennie offered me a smile. <So talk to her. She seems tough, but she’s very kind. And understanding. You know that.>

I did know that. I had seen it over and over from her, even in the few weeks we had spent together.

“Okay,” I said finally. “I’ll go talk to her.”

I stood up, gathered my bearings, and inhaled, steeling myself. Then I had a thought. “And no eavesdropping!”

Rosé giggled. “We wouldn’t dare!”

_Sure you wouldn’t._

\---

The climb up the stairs to Jisoo’s room felt like an eternity. Each step felt like I was fighting against the full force of the planet, a Herculean effort. I was actually afraid of what was going to happen. Not because I thought that Jisoo was going to attack me or anything—she was far too controlled for that. Just because I knew the whole situation shouldn’t have happened in the first place—and I was guilty of allowing it to happen.

I was a professional. Or at least, I was supposed to be. So why did I agree in the first place? Because I had been mad at YG? Because I thought it was harmless? Because... I had _hoped_ something would happen between us?

If the last statement was true, then I needed to seriously reevaluate everything. Because if that was true, then there was no reason for me to continue to put myself in this situation. It would be dangerous for the girls. And I wanted them to be safe.

Soon enough, I was standing outside of Jisoo and Rosé’s room. I waited there with my hand raised to knock, not wanting to break the silence and begin what was sure to be an awkward conversation.

I had, in a way, violated my agreement with Jisoo. I hadn’t directly told Jennie and Lisa anything, but they were capable of figuring out the finer details. Not to mention the fact that Rosé already knew. If Jisoo became furious with me, well, who could blame her?

I knocked. There was no point in putting it off any longer.

“Yes?” came the lilting, slightly husky voice of Jisoo from inside her room. “Rosie?”

“It’s... me,” I said. “I just wanted to talk.”

I was met with silence.

Instead of pushing her to respond, I stood there, just waiting for whatever decision she might make. Finally, after what was an agonizingly long wait, she spoke again.

“Come in.”

I opened the door to find her sitting curled up on her bed, a laptop and a book next to her. She had changed into baggy sweatpants and a loose t-shirt. She didn’t have any make-up on. She still looked stunning.

“What?” she asked as I closed the door behind me. “What is it?”

“Practicing English?” I asked.

She ignored me. “What is it?”

<Do you mind if I sit?> I indicated a chair pulled away from a desk on the side of the room. She nodded and I took the chair. <We need to talk.>

<We don’t have anything to talk about.>

I shook my head. <Yeah, we really do. Listen—>

She interrupted me, her voice turning angry. <No, _you_ listen. I am a professional. I am a YG employee. And I will do my job! Even if I made a stupid mistake, I will do my job. If you can’t handle that, then you can go.>

I fought against the urge to raise my voice at her. I wanted to. Her words had set my blood to boiling—that she would dare accuse me of being unable to do my job!

Until I realized that the reason her words incensed me so much was because there was some truth in what she was saying. And the fact that she would have the courage to speak to me that way was part of the reason why I was so fascinated with her.

So instead of giving into my burgeoning anger, I held my tongue and spoke calmly. <I know you don’t want to talk about it. I don’t want to talk about it either. I wouldn’t even be here if Rosé...>

<She knows?>

<She knew right away. She’s your friend, Jisoo. She knew as soon as she saw you.>

Jisoo sighed.

I continued. <And I know what you’re thinking—that we don’t even have to talk about it. But we do. Because we’re going to be together almost all the time. We’re going to tour the world together. Spend days and days with each other. And I don’t want to do that if we’re both going to be like this the whole time. That’s not fair to either of us.>

<What is there to say?> she asked me. And it was a good question. How could we make sense out of everything that had happened? It was _one night_ and it felt like it had changed everything.

<I don’t regret it,> I blurted out before I had a chance to stop myself. <I thought I would—I thought we both would. But...> My voice trailed off as I brought myself up short from finishing the sentence. Was I really going to admit that?

I was. Because we needed to be honest with each other if we had any hope of untangling this mess.

<...I haven’t stopped thinking about it,> I said finally, my face a little red and my voice coming out haltingly. <That night... that kiss. Maybe it was a mistake. But I can’t get it out of my head anyway.>

Jisoo’s anger had apparently evaporated, to be replaced with a look of confusion and surprise. Clearly that was not what she had expected me to say. <I’ve spent years doing this job,> I said. <And the more I do it, the harder it makes me. There’s an end in sight, eventually. I don’t want to do it forever. I can’t. But I’m good at it. It’s just that the more I do it, the more it takes away from me. From my life. From who I am. I think you understand.>

<So what?> Jisoo asked. <What are you saying? That we just go back to how things were before? I don’t know if I can pretend nothing happened.>

I knew what she meant. I felt the same way. I didn’t have an answer to that question either. <We can’t go back,> I answered. <But maybe we can go forward. Together. I’m not going to apologize anymore. I don’t think we have anything to apologize for. I think the world needs to apologize to us, for putting us in this situation.>

When Jisoo spoke, her voice was a whisper. <If we were anyone else... it wouldn’t matter.>

<But we’re not anyone else. We’re us.>

<I had a really nice time,> she said in a choked whisper and I saw a tear slip down her face. <Why can’t we just be normal?>

<One day,> I said, and I got up and sat next to her on the bed. There was some space between us, but I could still smell her hair, just as I had when we had kissed. <And then you can look back on this moment and laugh to yourself about the strange bodyguard in Seoul.>

She gave me a smile and wiped a tear from her cheek and then from her eye. <I’m sorry I was mad.>

<I’m sorry I didn’t talk to you about it,> I said. <You had every right to be mad.>

<So now what?>

It was a good question. We still needed to live with each other, to work with each other. There were people depending on both of us to be at the top of our game, and we owed it to them to make sure that we always were.

<We just do our job,> I said. <Together. Think we can do it?>

She offered me a wavering smile and I knew that she didn’t think it would just be that easy. Neither did I. <I think we can.>

<So we’re okay?> I asked from next to her on the bed. I realized that at some point since I had sat down, we had gotten much closer. I could practically feel the heat from her body on mine.

<We’re okay.>

I looked at her, and was taken aback by how close our faces were. There were mere inches separating us. My chest tightened as I felt her breath on my face. We froze for a fraction of a second, and then, we were moving closer, so slowly it was almost unnoticeable, our lips so close to touching I could almost feel her—

We both drew away at the same time, breathing hard. I stood up from the bed, smoothing my clothes, pretending to be directing my attention anywhere but to her.

<I’ll see you tomorrow,> I said. <Get some sleep. You’re going to kill it on stage.>

I glanced at her one last time before I left the room to find that her face looked as flushed as mine felt and that her shoulders were rising and falling with the force of her breathing.

We were okay. But this was going to be a lot harder than I had anticipated.

\---

The girls were still up when I came back down the stairs, all of them looking at me expectantly, no doubt wanting an update.

<We’re okay,> I said. <It’s going to be okay.>

Lisa let out a sigh as if she had been holding her breath the whole time. “Oh, thank God! I couldn’t deal with that tension for much longer!”

I neglected to mention that while one tension was gone, another was still there, and it was stronger than ever.

Rosé offered me a beaming smile and I couldn’t help but smile back. Her joy was always contagious. “I knew you two would work it out!” She patted the couch next to her. “Come sit!”

“I think I might just get to bed,” I said. “Tomorrow’s a big day.”

Jennie sighed from the couch. “Yeah... you’re probably right.”

“Thanks for helping me out,” I said.

Rosé gave me a knowing wink. “Any time.”

I headed back up to my room and I wished it was as simple as just having a conversation. We were back on speaking terms at least, and the icy gap that had formed between us seemed like it had disappeared for good. But that didn’t mean there were no problems now. The opposite seemed to be true.

As I undressed and got ready for bed, I wondered how it had gotten to this point. I was behaving like a teenager. I hadn’t done anything like this in many years. I honestly couldn’t remember the last time I had found myself in a situation this compromising—even when I had been CIA.

My thoughts were still spinning as I drifted off. It was a dilemma to be solved another day.

\---

I dreamed that night, distinct and clear dreams that I could remember well into the next day. In the dream, I was standing on a beach, by myself. The sky was gray, in that way that some oceanside towns could get on overcast days. Everything was tinted blue, as if the sun was being filtered through the concrete color of the clouds.

I was alone, or so it seemed. The only sound that I could hear was the crashing of the waves and the blowing of the wind, just enough to offer me a little chill.

I started to walk along the line of the ocean, just out of reach of the tide. There was a pier in the distance, and that’s where I was headed. I didn’t know why I was going there, all I knew was that it felt right.

As I approached, I realized that there was someone sitting on the edge of the pier, their legs dangling out over the water. For a second, I was filled with the overwhelming, unreasonable fear that the person was going to slip and fall into the ocean.

Like most dreams, the distance between me and the pier seemed to be meaningless, dropping away in a matter of seconds, when it should have taken me several minutes to walk there. Once I arrived though, it was no longer a pier. It was a cliff, with a lighthouse on top of it, looking out over a steel-gray sea. There was no way to the top of the cliff that I could see, so I began to climb, one hand over the other, slowly but steadily, finding footholds and handholds until I was able to pull myself onto solid ground.

The person was still sitting there, but now that I was much closer, I could tell who it was.

Jisoo. Of course it was Jisoo.

In the dream, I didn’t feel any shame or fear, there was nothing holding me back. In the dream, I was just a man and she was just a woman. We were just two people who shared a mutual attraction for each other.

I sat next to her and watched her stare out over the sea below us. She looked at peace. It was an expression I hadn’t seen on her face aside from our night in Seoul.

When she spoke, it was in English. Her accent remained, but the words flowed comfortably. I was struck then by how beautiful her voice was—the tone, the timbre, even the rhythm of her words.

“I didn’t think you were going to come.”

I reached down and took her hand without any hesitation. It felt small in mine, soft against my rough skin, but she didn’t pull away. Our fingers intertwined. “I always said I would, didn’t I?”

She smiled a little, an ironic smile that was hard to read. “I just wasn’t sure. Can you blame me?”

“No. I guess I can’t.”

We sat there together for a little, the wind casting strands of hair about her face. I leaned in and tucked some behind her ear. She turned to me and I realized there was nothing holding me back. There was nothing to stop us now. The rest of the world was so far behind us that it didn’t matter. We could just be ourselves.

We could be happy.

I kissed her, deep and slow, the way I wished that I could have that night in Seoul. We melted into each other, the space between us become smaller and smaller until we were locked in each other’s arms, tasting each other, letting ourselves feel what we had wanted so badly.

I pulled away, because I wanted to see her face, to kiss her forehead and cheeks, to tell her that everything was going to be okay now—

But before I could, the dream had slipped away from me, and I was returned to the stark reality of my bed in the small guestroom.

I lay there, very still, for many minutes after, wondering what she was doing and if she was thinking of me in the same way I was thinking of her. Part of me hoped that she was. Part of me prayed that she wasn’t.

\---

There are few things stranger than being in an empty stadium prior to a massive concert. Security and staff were milling about of course, as were other YG employees, but for the most part, the stadium was empty. This was night one of a two-night stretch in South Korea, kicking off the In Your Area World Tour.

The girls were nervous. They were so busy that it was a little hard to tell how nervous they were, but I could pick it up from their body language and mannerisms. They knew what was coming tonight and it was filling them with anticipation.

I was feeling it too. There was a lot I needed to keep in mind for tonight. I needed to know exit plans, backup plans, along with personnel placement and all the other minutia of the arena. It was going to be my life for the foreseeable future—studying blueprints and coming up with plans.

During the show, I would be circulating backstage, ready to burst into action if necessary. Part of me wished that I would be able to watch because I wanted to see their concert live, as it was meant to be watched. But that wasn’t my job, and I had no room to be selfish.

Even if I really did want to see Jisoo on stage.

Currently, I was standing off stage, watching Lisa trying to help the rest of the girls with a particularly complicated maneuver. Off-stage rehearsals were one thing but figuring out your footwork on what was literally different ground could be something else altogether.

Not for the first time, I was glad that I didn’t have their job.

When they finished whatever it was that they were attempting to do, they started to head off stage in my direction, talking, laughing, smiling, and bouncing with nervous energy.

<You guys ready?> I asked.

Jennie gave me a scornful look. <Of course we are. We’re Blackpink!> Her tone was so serious that it took me off guard a little bit, but then I saw her smile and we both laughed. <I think we’re going to be okay.>

<Green room?> asked Rosé. <I’m starving!>

<This way,> I said, gesturing at them to follow me. <They showed me where it was.>  
Not only had I seen where it was, but I had also screened it to make sure it was safe and defensible. And it was. YG had done the work. It would take a madman or an army to breach this place after security locked it down.

I opened up the green room door and the girls each let out a gasp of excitement.

<It’s wonderful!> Lisa cried, running in ahead of everyone else and throwing herself down on one of the couches in the room.

I chuckled. <Haven’t you been in a green room before?>

Lisa offered me a sarcastic glance and a middle finger. <Still wonderful!>

Rosé had found the food and looked like she was going to explode with joy.

Jisoo was sitting on another couch across from Lisa, already on her phone, absorbed in whatever game was currently occupying her attention. I took a seat near Lisa, facing Jisoo.

<Are you excited?> I asked whoever was listening.

Jennie, who was examining herself in the mirror, was the one who responded. <We’re back! So… yeah, you know? It’s been so long. I miss seeing Blinks and I miss being on stage. I miss feeling… like an idol. Is that weird? Does that mean I have an ego?>

I smiled at her. <Of course not. It just means that’s what you love to do. You four were born to perform. I’ve seen you do it. There’s no one else who could do Blackpink better than you guys.>

Jisoo looked up from her phone. <You haven’t seen us perform. Only rehearse. There’s a big difference. We’re going to blow your mind!>

It was the first time she had spoken directly to me since the previous night, aside from brief greetings and pleasantries. The other three girls all exchanged and glance and then looked at me. Rosé was trying to hide a smile and mostly failing. Thankfully, Jisoo seemed to not notice. Or if she did, she didn’t say anything about it.

<I’m looking forward to it,> I said. And I really did mean it.

There wasn’t much left to do other than wait. The girls needed to rest their voices and I needed to make sure that the stadium remained safe. Soon, the In Your Area Tour would begin and the stadium would be filled with 20,000 people.

In fact, if the reports were correct, there were already dedicated Blinks lining up out front, waiting to be the first inside to see their beloved idols.

I looked around at the girls and felt proud for them. They had worked so hard to get here, and this was just the beginning. Soon, we would be flying around the globe, meeting Blinks from all over the world.

I could almost hear the roar of the crowd. It was just about time to begin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to anyone who is still reading! I'm having so much fun writing this and exploring the world of K-pop and crime ;)
> 
> Comments are ALWAYS appreciated. Please support Blackpink and let me know if there's anything you'd like to see!


	6. Showtime

_ 2018. _

The roar of the crowd was deafening, and I was only backstage. I couldn’t imagine what it would be like to stand there in front of those 20,000 screaming fans. Fortunately, I wasn’t going to have to.

The girls were going to have to though. And by the look on their faces, they were all very aware that in a few short minutes, they were going to be doing just that. Their nerves were so tense that I could practically see the stress radiating off of their body.

Lisa was giving Jennie a neck rub, trying to work out some of the kinks that had formed due to the stress. I was nervous _for_ them.

That wasn’t the only reason I was feeling nervous. At some point, Jisoo had gotten up from her seat on the other couch and joined me, tucking her legs up under her and looking at me with eyes that showed that she just needed a friendly presence. I was happy to provide that presence, but her closeness was making my heart beat a little harder than it should have been, given the circumstances.

_You’re acting like a teenager!_

I scolded myself, but nothing I told myself would make me feel any different. It was… just the way things were now. I was getting used to it—and maybe, just maybe, I was starting to realize that it wasn’t so bad. That I could balance this feeling with my professionalism. Maybe we could do it.

That’s what I was telling myself when Jisoo turned and leaned her head on my shoulder, letting out a small sigh. <Nervous,> she said. “My stomach is full of… butterflies.” She looked at me, trying to gauge whether her English idiom was correct. I gave her a smile to indicate that it was.

I saw Rosé trying to hide her smile, but her poker face was terrible. Either that, or I was just getting good at reading her. I had a feeling it was a little of both.

“You’re going to do great,” I said, making my voice as calm and reassuring as possible. “You’re the best in the world. You know that.”

“Still scary,” said Jisoo. She shivered, though whether it was for effect or due to actual nerves, I couldn’t tell.

There was a knock on the green room door and Jisoo shot off my shoulder like a rocket. The girls all turned, knowing what that knock meant. I stood up and gave them an encouraging smile. Rosé inhaled deeply and nodded.

<It’s time,> came the voice from the other side. One of their managers, I believed it was.

<You got this,> I said quietly. <Go show them what you can do.>

Jisoo gave me one last glance before the four of them filed out the door, with my bringing up the rear, ready for the show to begin.

\---

Now that I was closer to the stage, the sound of the fans was overwhelming. I almost couldn’t believe that the four women I had been living with, the four bubbly, silly, and sweet women that I had come to know, were about to face an arena of 20,000.

But I could believe it, because I had seen how strong they were, and I knew that no matter, they were going to make sure that their fans got the show of a lifetime. I took up a position just off stage, where I could keep an eye on as much as possible. I cranked my earpiece so I could hear security—but only in one ear, so I could hear the show as well. It wasn’t just for selfish reasons. I wanted to know at what point of the set they were at so that I could keep track of where the girls were and what they were doing.

I was armed, up to date, and ready. If anything happened, I would be prepared. There would be no more getting caught by surprise. Not this time.

And then the crowd somehow managed to get louder as the lights fell and I began to hear the opening notes of “Ddu-Du Ddu-Du.” The girls burst onto the stage and the show began.

Which meant my job had just begun as well. The problem with being only one person meant I needed to rely on the team of YG operatives that were set up through the arena. I could hear them checking in, clearing their areas and making sure that nothing was amiss. This was all according to plan, and there was nothing out of the ordinary. So far, at least.

The girls were tearing it up on stage, moving with such ease and confidence that I could hardly believe my eyes. They had transformed into the true definition of idols, capturing the attention of their fans and giving every person in the arena the show of a lifetime.

I understood concerts of course, but this was a whole other level. Rosé had attempted to explain it to me one night, how their fans were so dedicated that they would make huge sacrifices to buy tickets, to make it to a show, even to buy merch. Because of that, the members of Blackpink made sure to work extra hard to provide their BLINKs with everything they possibly could.

It was sweet, but what I didn’t mention was how it was YG that benefited from all of it. Blackpink worked themselves to the bone, while Hyun-suk and the rest of YG reaped the rewards. And that was on top of the side businesses that YG was engaging in. That I was technically covering for.

I watched Jisoo dance her way around the stage and wondered what she would think if she knew the truth of what was going on behind closed doors at YG. Even I didn’t know the full truth, but I could imagine that it wasn’t pretty.

The girls were preparing to go into their next song, and it was time for me to start making a circuit around the stage area, checking out hotspots, and making sure I was never too far from the girls.

_I’m only one person._

But I had to remind myself that I wasn’t alone, that there were YG security guards everywhere, and that they were well-trained, too. I was the insurance. I was the last resort.

\---

The concert was going perfectly—the girls had just exited the stage at the end of the first “act.” I was stunned at the girls’ showmanship. At Lisa’s dancing, Rosé’s vocals, Jennie’s presence and attitude, and Jisoo… well, she was a vision. On stage, it was like she turned into someone else, an otherworldly being capable of transcending her human form. She moved like an angel. Even her facial expressions were like she was floating above everyone else. I supposed that was her actress streak coming out—it was what made her the lead visual of the group.

Or so the dossier had said.

I had to tear my attention away and remind myself that I needed to stay focused. It was getting harder and harder to do that lately, and I knew why. But fortunately, we had worked that problem out. Hadn’t we?

Part of me was satisfied with the way things had turned out. The other part of me wasn’t so sure. What if things weren’t finished yet? The dream that I had experienced just the other night… and of course, that brief moment after we had spoken… I just wasn’t sure.

But then, Jisoo seemed fine. Comfortable, at ease, behaving without a hint of tension.

It was just me, surely. I needed to get over it and move onwards. Friends, colleagues, partners. That’s what we were. And that’s all we would ever be.

And speaking of Jisoo, it looked like her solo song was about to begin—a rendition of Zedd’s hit song “Clarity,” with new Korean lyrics written by Jisoo herself. She stepped out, looking like a vision of an angel, and begin to sing, her voice strong, stable, and smooth.

I thought all the members of Blackpink had stunning voices—but hers carried something extra, something that was full of emotion and rawness. I watched her emote and own the stage, all by herself, carrying the crowd of 20,000 so easily that it looked as if she wasn’t even trying. I knew that on the inside, she must have been terrified, but her face was pure artistry and focus, utterly locked in on the music and the experience she was crafting for her BLINKs.

And that was when the voice came through my earpiece, a hurried Korean voice anxiously saying, <Security just saw an unidentified individual slip through a staff door.>

I tapped the earpiece and spoke. <Oliver here. Can anyone ID them? Bad footage? Out of uniform?>

<That’s a negative. Security wasn’t even sure how they got in. They didn’t use a keycard. At least not one the camera could pick up.>

I felt a surge of adrenaline and pushed it down. I needed to stay calm. My previous thoughts were gone, cast away by laser focus. <Give me the location. Lockdown the stage. Don’t stop the concert. Send teams to all exits attached to that entrance.>

<Copy that. Stand by.>

My hand went to my holster weapon, just waiting to explode into action. Only a few seconds later, the information came through my earpiece, giving me both a location and a description of the man who had disappeared into the security area.

<I’m on my way.>

I ran, not caring what I looked like. I had never believed in the power of “looking cool” or anything like that. My outward appearance meant nothing—all that mattered was how well I was able to execute my purpose. This time, my purpose was finding out who this stranger was.

The description was fitting with someone who might have been part of a gang or other criminal organization—loose fitting tan suit, messy dress shirt. It could be nothing. It probably was nothing. But I wasn’t taking a chance.

I burst onto the scene, swiping my ID on the door in question, just before noticing a discarded piece of tech on the ground. I recognized it immediately. It was designed to spoof ID cards, especially less complex ones like this door.

<Tighten security around the stage,> I said, my voice terse. <This is a breach.>

I drew my gun and stepped past the now open door.

\---

I could still hear the concert going on, but it was a little more muffled now that I had entered into the sectioned off back-section of the arena, only for employees. I ran the plans of the arena through my head, the plans that I had memorized in the event of something like this. There was only one place that the intruder could be going—he was going to head up, above the stage, likely to ambush the girls (or girl, if he only wanted one) right as they were entering or exiting the main stage.   
It made sense. It was what I would have done. A quick smash and grab, and then exfiltrate before anyone knew what had happened. I had no doubt that there were operatives in the arena, waiting to cover or cause a distraction.

The worst part was that a distraction wouldn’t even really be needed. The concert was distraction enough and right now, the girls were on stage solo—

_Oh no._

Jisoo’s song would be ending in a matter of seconds. I didn’t know for sure that the man was going to go after her, but it would make sense.

I broke into a sprint, my arms and legs pumping hard, pushing myself to my limits. I blew past a number of employees who gave me strange looks as I turned the corner, hitting the rickety metal steps that led to the area above the stage.

I was right. The tan-suited man was hooking a rappel line to the scaffolding above the back of the stage. He was going to drop down, snatch someone, and raise himself back up before anyone noticed. Even if someone did notice, he could likely count on aid from any number of other people scattered throughout the arena.

“On the fucking ground!” I shouted, not caring if he understood English or not. I trained my gun on him, knowing that one bullet would end him—but not wanting to pull the trigger. A gunshot _might_ be covered up by the music, but it might not be. And if I killed him, there was no way to learn anything else from him. It would be just another dead end.

The man jerked towards me, as if surprised to see me. The whole operation was sloppy—if I had been in his position, I would have _never_ turned my back to the door—so I wasn’t shocked to see the lack of skill.

The man raised his hands and I realized something—the music had stopped and the crowd was roaring. Jisoo was finished—she was coming off-stage. There was no way for the man to rappel down and make his way back up. Not with me standing here.

That meant he had a backup plan—no doubt to rush his captive out with a group of partners.

I couldn’t let that happen.

<Block backstage exits,> I snapped into the earpiece. The concert didn’t need to be interrupted. Not yet. I could handle this before it got out of control.

I could hear the voices over the earpiece telling me that Jisoo was exiting the stage now. There was no more time to waste.

I threw myself at the man, trying to close the distance between us, while still attempting to maintain my balance and not go plummeting to the floor below. I managed to stay on my feet as the tan-suited man fumbled with what I imagine would be a gun. I didn’t want to shoot—there were just too many people for me to take a risk like that.

Surprisingly, it wasn’t a gun that emerged from the suit, but a butterfly knife that the man spun as he flipped it open, menacing me with the blade. It was pointless and amateurish; he was just wasting time. But that was okay. I used it to my advantage, feinting to the left before ducking under a wild swing of the blade and delivering a crushing blow to the man’s side.

He fell to the side and I grabbed his arm, the one holding the blade, and twisted, forcing him to drop it. I swept a foot underneath him, sending him to the ground, allowing me to mount his back and bend his arm behind his back painfully, causing him to curse at me in Korean.

<Intruder apprehended,> I said into the earpiece. I had barely broken a sweat. One amateur attacker did not make a successful mission. <Send clean-up to the above stage scaffolding.>

I held the man down and looked below me, to the backstage area. People were still milling about and I caught a glimpse of Jisoo as she moved to change into her next outfit.

They were still safe.

For now.

\---

I hovered backstage the rest of the show, keeping a close lookout for anything suspicious, but there was nothing. If the attacker had brought backup, they had vanished as soon as he had been apprehended.

Hyun-suk said he was sending people to collect the intruder. I didn’t think that they were going to be law enforcement members, either. It would probably be YG’s personal security army—which I was beginning to think was actually a thinly veiled group of enforcers.

The show carried on better than smoothly—it went perfectly. The girls continued to hit every mark, every note, and every dance move with flawless execution. I couldn’t help but think that in a different life, with that coordination they had, any of them could have become a deadly combatant if they had wanted to.

Of course, that had never happened and instead they were four artists, creating something beautiful for millions of people across the globe.

When the show ended, I made sure to be the one to usher the girls backstage to the afterparty, which would be taking place in one of the large conference rooms that were in the arena. It was something of a small office room, with the cubicles ripped out. There were restrooms and the like along the one wall. I imagined that the room was used for planning and staff breaks. There were no fewer than four guards posted at both entrances to the room, the only people who were allowed to enter were those who were expressly trusted YG employees.

Jisoo gave me a suspicious look as we passed the guards, and I knew that she had figured out that _something_ had happened to cause the heightened security. Why did she have to be so smart?

As we entered, one of the girl’s managers popped a bottle of champagne, and the people in the room begin cheering and celebrating. I recognized a few as YG employees, a few as other idols, and some were the members’ friends from their personal lives.

_Personal lives. What a joke that is._

They didn’t really have personal lives, of course. Their job wouldn’t let them. They just had what came before Blackpink and whatever moments they could steal in the meantime.

The girls went off to greet their friends and co-workers, and I chose to linger by the down, keeping my hands clasped in front of me. I didn’t expect any more trouble (nor did I expect to hear anymore details about the attacker from Hyun-suk), but I would remain vigilant nonetheless.

I appreciated that no one was attempting to engage me in small talk. I was more than happy to just watch the girls mingle and be idols, basking in the success of their first show. The first performance of the In Your Area World Tour.

I would congratulate them later, when we were alone, back in the house.

That was when I heard the doors open just behind me, surprising me, since I didn’t really think anyone else was going to be making an appearance today. I wondered for a second if it was going to be Hyun-suk, here to congratulate the girls and get a look at the attacker, but I realized that was absurd. He would never risk himself or dirty his hands that way. It wasn’t his style.

Instead, I saw a man, maybe a little older than the girls, step in shyly, looking a little uncomfortable. I could tell right away though, that he wasn’t just a random person. He looked immaculate—glamorous, even—with perfectly styled hair and skin that was practically glowing. I realized that whoever this was, he was probably another idol, from another group.

I glanced towards the girls and saw Jisoo turn. She paused momentarily when she saw the newcomer, then her eyes widened. She excused herself from the conversation she was involved in, then made her way over to where I was standing with the stranger. I could tell from her posture that she was excited to see him, whoever he was.

<Seokjin!> she said as she got close. The two exchanged a slight hug and I saw Seokjin, if that was his name, smile and become a little more comfortable.

<Jichoo,> he said warmly. <I saw the show and I wanted to congratulate you. And the rest of the girls.> He added the last bit almost as an afterthought.

I was sensing some history here.

My presence must have been making Seokjin nervous, because he gave me a small sideways look. Jisoo grinned and introduced me. <This is Oliver! He’s our new bodyguard. YG wanted the best. So we got Ollie.>

Seokjin gave me a little bow and then stuck his hand out. I shook it warmly. <Pleasure to meet you,> I said.

Seokjin had a mischievous grin. <He doesn’t know?>

<Oliver is American,> said Jisoo. <So… probably not. Oliver, Seokjin is a member of BTS.>

Ah. That made sense. That explained why he looked like that and how they knew each other. It also explained how he had gotten back here.

<Do they know you’re here?> asked Jisoo. I knew what she meant. Surely BTS had just as many, if not more, restrictions on their movement and travel.

Seokjin shrugged and glanced at me again. <Who can say?>

Jisoo laughed and touched my arm lightly. <Ollie won’t tell!> She leaned in conspiratorially. <He helped me sneak out too.>

Seokjin relaxed a little. <Oh. Not the usual kind of guard, I guess?>

Jisoo smiled. <Not at all. What did you think of the show?>

I politely excused myself from the conversation, leaving Jisoo and Seokjin by themselves, giving them the privacy that they deserved, even if they hadn’t asked for it. Instead, I found my way over to where Rosé was—which was, perhaps not surprisingly, next to the table of snacks.

She turned to look at me with a carrot stick in her mouth and I had to smother a laugh. She cracked a grin and chomped the stick. <Jin is here!> she said, noticing Jisoo’s companion. <Ah!> Then she looked at me and her face went a little pink.

<Mhmm,> I said, smiling at her uncomfortable expression. <They know each other?> I leaned on the wall next to the snack table, enjoying Rosé’s awkwardness.

<I mean… well…>

I lifted an eyebrow, attempting to appear mock-stern. <Telle me, Rosie.>

<Sort of!> she squeaked. <They were almost close for a little. They talk a lot now. But… you know how it is.> She stepped away from the table. I followed and we found a quiet corner of the now relatively loud room.

<You know that I’m kidding, right?” I asked.

Rosé nodded, her mouth full, but her eyes were still a little wide, showing that she might not have been as sure as she was claiming.

<I’m grateful for you,> I said suddenly.

She looked at me confused.

I felt a little confused too. Where had that come from? I knew the answer before the question even finished making its way through my brain. It had come from my discussions with Jisoo. From the realizations that I had made about myself and the way I had been living my life for years.

<I just… haven’t had a friend in a while,> I said. <And it’s nice.>

Rosé offered me a smile. <I’m glad we’re friends too, Ollie.>

<I know I asked you this before, but why don’t you go by Chaeyoung?>

She cocked her head, considering. <I do, actually. The girls call me that sometimes. Or Chaeng. Or Rosé. Or Rosie. I have the most names!> She laughed.

<Do you want me to call you Chaeyoung?>

She shrugged. <Usually Americans just call me Rosé. It’s easier.>

<But you’re Chaeyoung.>

She reached up and poked me on the nose. <You worry a lot about names for an American.>

“Guess I’m not your average American.”

“Definitely not.” Rosé (or Chaeyoung, I hadn’t decided yet) looked around, and then frowned. “Hey. Wait. Ollie, did you see Jennie.”

“I… yeah, she was just over there…”

But Jennie was not standing next to Lisa anymore. In fact, according to the quick sweep I gave the room, Jennie wasn’t even in the room anymore. Had she slipped out that easily?

_It’s because you were focused on Jisoo and Jin, you idiot._

Which was stupid—why would I even care if she was talking to a friend, even if it was one that she may or may not have had a little bit of history with?

I moved to the door, whipped it out and spoke harshly to the guards standing there, probably too harshly. <Did you see Kim Jennie leave this room?>

They looked startled. One scratched his head and said, <Uh… yeah. Bathroom.>

<There’s a bathroom _in_ the conference room, you moron!> I shouted. I would regret my tone later, I knew, but in the moment, I was too concerned to care. <Which way?>

The man pointed and I tore off in the indicated direction, already prepared for the worst. If there were anymore intruders lurking around and Jennie was taken because I had been neglectful…

It was at that point that I realized Rosé had _come with me_ for some reason, even though it would have been far safer for her to stay back in the party. She was just behind me, having taken off her heels, and was running barefoot through the hall.

“What are you doing?!” I roared, not even bothering with Korean.

“She’s my friend too!” the small woman retorted, and I didn’t respond.

Instead, I came to a dead stop and threw out my arm, catching Rosé’s small frame and preventing her from going any further. She almost flipped over my arm, she was so light. She shot me a look of annoyance that faded quickly when I silently gestured down a hallway to the left. We both peeked around the corner as much as possible while still remaining concealed. 

Jennie was standing there, and she had just opened what looked like a maintenance closet and slipped inside, closing it behind her. Before going into the closet, she looked around nervously, almost worriedly, then vanished from sight.

“What the hell?” Rosé whispered.

“Wait. Here.” I hissed. “Do NOT move.”

She stuck her tongue out at me, but she didn’t move, so that was something, at least.

I drew my gun and stalked down the hallway, moving as quietly as possible. I didn’t think Jennie was in danger necessarily… but something strange was going on, and I couldn’t allow secrets to come into play if I was going to continue to do my job.

Unfortunately, the maintenance closet was bigger than a closet, and I couldn’t hear anything from the outside. So I steeled myself, braced my gun, and threw open the door so hard that it slammed into the wall.

I ducked in, gun aimed, and saw Jennie standing there, a silhouette in the blackness—but she wasn’t alone. My heart caught in my throat as I saw a man, almost as tall as I was, holding tightly onto her. “Let her go!” I shouted. “NOW! Don’t fucking move!”

Jennie and the man sprang apart as if they had been electrocuted. My entrance had been so fast that they hadn’t even had time to react to the door slamming, and it was my scream that startled them.

“Ollie!” Jennie gasped.

“Lights!” I ordered. She looked like she was going to argue, but instead, she sullenly stepped past me and flipped the lights on, to reveal the identity of the man who had been grabbing her.

He was…

_Oh, what the hell was this?_

He had to be another idol. There was no way he wasn’t. Chiseled face, strong jawline, flawless skin. I groaned. “What the…”

The man reached a hand out. “Easy. I can pay you. Just keep this quiet.”

Jennie was blushing madly, and I understood what had happened. What was still happening.

_Secrets are going to be the death of us._

I holstered my gun. <You don’t have to worry,> I said. <Fuck. You scared us, Jennie. If you had just told _one_ of us.>

<I told Lisa,> she said angrily, and I realized then that I hadn’t even thought to ask Lisa about where Jennie had gone. <This isn’t your business.>

<Your safety is my business.>

<I’m SAFE with Kai! Kai wasn’t the one who pointed the gun at me!>

That stung, but I wasn’t going to let her know that. <You should have talked to _me._ You know I’m not going to tell YG!>

<Yeah? And why is that, exactly? What’s your problem with the boss? Or the company? How do I know you don’t have your own agenda?> She was in my face now, challenging me, and I realized that these were all very good questions. They were questions that I couldn’t answer.

<I’m sorry,> I said, shaking my head. <But I need you to understand the position that I am in. This is my job.>

“This is my life!” she shouted.

Kai came up behind her and placed a calming hand on her shoulder. She shrugged it off, but his touch seemed to have brought her down a few degrees.

“I’m not going to tell anyone,” I said. “I don’t care what you do in your personal life. But I just… I really need you to keep me in the loop with these things. You need to trust me.”

“How do I know I can?” asked Jennie, and with those words from her, my heart broke. “You come here as a stranger and we’re just supposed to trust you? And yeah, I know, you saved us all. But… you understand, don’t you?”

I did understand. I understood everything that she wasn’t saying—about how her life was spent under lock and key, doing whatever other people told her to do, limiting her freedom because that was what they wanted for her. Her own success was her prison.

Maybe I could relate to that.

“I’m going to be around the corner,” I said, my voice quieter now. “When you’re ready to come back, just start walking out. I’ll follow behind.”

Jennie’s face was still flushed, but she didn’t seem to have much else to say. What else _could_ she say? I stepped out of the closet and let the door close, and almost walked right into Rosé.

<I thought I told you to not move?> I asked, even though I wasn’t surprised that she hadn’t listened to me.

She shrugged, a little embarrassed. <I heard shouting. I wanted to know.>

<Did you know?> I asked. <About her and Kai?>

<Sort of. I didn’t know he was here though.>

I sighed. Maybe things were a little more complicated than I had previously expected.

\---

The atmosphere at the Blackpink house was subdued afterward, even though everyone should have been excited. Mostly, they were just tired. Jennie didn’t seem to want to speak to me, even if she wasn’t angry anymore. Jisoo was giving off a similar feeling and I wondered if she was feeling awkward because of her encounter with Jin.

Rosé was just exhausted and so was Lisa. I didn’t blame them. I felt tired, and my activity had only been a fraction of theirs.

<Gonna sleep,> said Lisa, only a few minutes after we had got back in. <Night. Let’s kick ass tomorrow, girls.>

They all wished her good night. Soon, Rosé followed, and so did Jennie, leaving only Jisoo and I in the living room.

Realistically, I should have just gone to sleep. In fact, I almost did, since the silence between us felt strange. She was playing a game on her phone, as usual, and I was attempting to read a few pages of my book from the comfort of the couch, a glass of water next to me. I was having a hard time focusing though.

Just before I gave up and retired to my room for the night, Jisoo spoke.

<Did you like the show?> She sounded almost nervous, which surprised me.

I closed my book and gave her an encouraging smile. <You were all amazing! I knew you’d be great. But I didn’t know you were going to be _that_ great. And your solo was just… wow.>

Jisoo beamed, her cheeks lifting from her elation.

<I’m glad you got to see your friend,> I said tentatively, not wanting to leave it unspoken, but also not wanting to make her feel any more uncomfortable.

<Oh!> she said, and her smile faded a bit. <Yes. It was nice.>

I didn’t know what else to say. If they had history, that was Jisoo’s business, not mine. But a part of me… wanted to know.

Why? Why did it matter to me at all?

_Because it could affect the way I do my job,_ I told myself. And I almost believed it. Almost.

Jisoo sighed. <Seokjin is a good friend. He knows what our lives are like. He’s been there for me a lot.>

_And you two have a history._

Jisoo got up from her seat and came to sit next to me, snuggling up against me. My suit jacket had been discarded, and was hanging over the back of the chair, meaning it was easy for me to feel the warmth of her tired, small body against mine.

<We tried to make it work,> she said and I could hear the sadness in her words. <But our companies… they made it very hard.>

I didn’t say anything. She didn’t even seem to be talking entirely to me—her words were for herself, as well, saying things that she needed to get off her chest.

<I think about it sometimes,> she said. <What it might have been like. Does that make you angry? You can be angry at me. I should have told you before. Before we…>

I took her hand in mine. <Jisoo. It’s okay. Your past and your life are your own. You don’t owe me or anyone else. And… we talked about it. We talked about why we can’t ever…>

<Yeah. We did. I couldn’t live like that. Could you? I don’t know how Jennie does it.>

_No. I couldn’t live like that. Right?_

Instead, I asked, <How long has Jennie been seeing Kai?>

Jisoo shrugged. <Not long. He makes her happy.>

<Do you approve?>

<I told her what had happened to… me. And Jin,> she said. <Being with another idol is hard. But another idol is the only person who can understand what it’s really like.> She looked at me and I saw frustration on her face. <I’m lonely! We all are, and YG doesn’t care. Not just YG. Most companies, too. Why would they? They get money, we get famous. Who needs friends? Or relationships?>

_I can understand what it’s like._

But of course, I didn’t say that.

Jisoo kept going. <I’m always the brave one, always the strong one. The other girls cry, and that’s okay, but sometimes I just get so tired. When do I cry? When I’m by myself I guess. I love them. But sometimes I need things too.> She turned and buried her face in my arm.

I removed my arm and put it around her shoulders, pulling her close. Part of me was screaming at myself, telling myself that we were veering back into dangerous territory. The other part of me was calm and rational, fully aware that we were two mature adults—and more than that, we were clearly friends.

<Something happened again tonight, didn’t it?> Jisoo asked.

I knew better than to lie to her. <How did you know?>

She gave me a sneaky grin. <Because you weren’t there to congratulate me after my solo.>

I snorted. <Maybe I was busy.>

<Too busy to watch me?>

<Well, when you put it like that…>

We laughed together, and mercifully she didn’t ask me to explain what had happened. I didn’t even know if I understood what had happened, to be honest. And Hyun-suk was clearly not offering any answers.

It was in that moment that I realized if I wanted to know anymore—and I did, if only to keep the girls safe—I would need to do some investigating on my own. That would be the next step.

<Ollie…>

<Hmm?>

<I don’t want to be alone anymore.>

At first, I didn’t know what to say. Her voice was so unguarded, her emotion was so honest and open. I knew how hard it was for her to be like this with someone because it was just as hard for me. We had both spent years avoiding this side to ourselves and now that we were facing it, we didn’t have any clue how to handle it.

<Neither do I,> I whispered, and my voice came out choked, as if the words had to struggle to breach my lips.

She looked up at me and when our eyes met, I knew. We both did.

This wasn’t something that was going to go away. This wasn’t something that we were going to just push down and ignore. We couldn’t. We had tried, and it didn’t work.

<Is this what you want?> I asked.

“Yes,” she murmured.

And then our lips were touching, and there was nothing hesitant about it any longer.

We kissed, desperate for each other, desperate for the companionship and the contact that we had both been missing for so long. I could feel her in my hands, soft and strong, her skin smooth and perfect. She melted into me—or maybe I melted into her—as we both gave up any pretense of attempting to resist.

There were fireworks going off in my brain, driving away any chance of coherent thought, and while we were in each other’s arms, the only thing that existed, the only thing that was real, was Jisoo.

She pushed me, and I fell backwards onto the couch. It was amazing, how those slim arms could move my much bigger frame. It was as if she had some sort of power over me, a power that made me helpless. A way I hadn’t felt in so long.

Jisoo was on top of me, pressing down onto me, and we were tasting each other. I could feel her breath, the heat of her skin. I could hear her moan lightly as I wrapped my arms around her, drawing her closer to me. It all felt so natural, like this was something we should have done sooner. Like the struggle we had put into fighting it had been pointless at best and harmful at worst.

It felt like this was where I belonged.

Finally, breathlessly, our heads separated. We both looked at each other and I saw that she was trying to fight back a smile. She climbed off me with great care and I had to stifle a chuckle.

<Maybe we take it slow,> she suggested.

<Yeah,> I said, sitting up and catching my breath. <Slow.>

I didn’t know what this would mean for the future. I didn’t know how we were going to handle it or hide it or make it work with the kind of lives we led. But I did know that above all else, this was good.

We weren’t alone anymore. We didn’t have to be.

We had each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts? Suggestions? Favorite moments? Let me know! I love to hear from readers <3
> 
> Make sure to support Blackpink and all of the girls!


	7. Say Goodbye

_ 2018. _

The second show went off without a hitch. There were no intruders and nothing even resembling a problem. I was on high alert the entire time, hovering near the stage, running checks with the staff every couple of minutes. After what had happened last night, I didn’t want to take any chances.

Thankfully, there were no surprises. No one trying to trespass or attack the girls, no surprise guests after the show. Even better, there wasn’t much of an afterparty this time. Just a small get-together in the green room before we all headed back to the Blackpink house.

I got to watch the show a little more this time, and I was more impressed than ever with how the girls managed to perform so flawlessly. Jisoo’s vocals were stunning and powerful, raw and emotional. Rosé somehow managed to pull off an innocent and sexy vibe at the same time, all while remaining a vocal powerhouse. Lisa had the stage presence of an absolute goddess, and Jennie, well, she could just do it all.

It was strange though, because after this show, there was going to be a break—for about two months. It was because of the holidays, I assumed, and the girls were in fact going to be going home to their families. I had asked Hyun-suk if he thought this would be a problem, if it would make them vulnerable. But he assured me that all would be taken care of and that there was no chance of anything happening. I took his word for it. I couldn’t do much else, of course. It simply wasn’t possible for me to be in four places at once, and I couldn’t play favorites.

Trusting Hyun-suk didn’t sit well with me, but it was the only option. I supposed it made sense. The girls would be far less public and far better hidden while they were abroad. That would bring them at least a modicum of safety.

As for me, well, I planned on staying right here. I didn’t have anyone to spend the holidays with. This didn’t bother me, as it was no different than any other year. To me, the holiday season had stopped meaning something a long time ago. I didn’t see this as a bad thing. It just was.

I said goodbye to Lisa and Jennie first, as they left at almost the same time.

“Be safe,” I said to Jennie, giving her a hug. “I won’t be there to keep you out of trouble.”

She smiled, and I knew that despite the strain that our previous fight had put on our relationship, things were going to be okay. I might have to work to regain her trust, but it would happen eventually.

Lisa, on the other hand, had nothing to hold back from me. She threw her arms around me in a tight hug. “I’ll see you soon!” she said. “It’ll be weird not having you around!”

“You’ll get used to it,” I said with a crooked grin. “It’ll be nice not having someone following your every move.”

She pouted. “But I like when you follow me around!”

“Makes you feel important?”

She laughed. “Something like that. Enjoy your time off!”

It wasn’t that simple though. I wouldn’t be working to protect the girls, true, but Hyun-suk had already informed me that there might be... another task for me to complete. This had been part of our original deal, so I informed him that I would await the details before choosing to accept or not.

That meant it was now just Rosé, Jisoo, and myself in the house. Jisoo was packing slowly and Rosé reported that every time she went to check on Jisoo, she was spending more time playing games on her computer than getting anything done. I had to laugh. I wasn’t surprised by that in the least.

Rosé was more or less done getting ready at that point. She was just waiting for her ride to come get her. It felt a little bittersweet. I had gotten close with her, and even though we would be reunited soon, I would miss her morning antics and her deep appreciation for every kind of food. She was fun and easy to get along with and I liked that about her.

“You going to be okay without me?” she asked.

“I’ll be okay,” I said. “It’s going to be quiet though.”

Rosé smiled. “You’re going to get so bored without us around!”

“I think I’ll manage to keep busy.”

Rosé leaned back on the couch and put her feet up on the other end. “You say that now, but I’ll know you’ll be missing us soon.” She winked.

“I probably will,” I said honestly. “I like you guys.”

She pretended to be astonished. “Really? Even me?”

“Even you.”

She let out a fake sigh. “Thank goodness. I was worried there for a little.” Then she gave me a mischievous look. “Gonna say goodbye to Jisoo?”

I pretended to not understand what she was implying. “Hm? Yeah, of course.”

Rosé rolled her eyes. “You think you’re sooo clever. But you’re bad at lying.”

_Not the first time I’ve heard that._

I sighed. “Is it that obvious?”

“I live with her, Ollie. I was always going to find out.”

“I guess you were.”

She stopped for a minute, looked thoughtful, then sat up and leaned forward towards me. I was standing by the sliding doors to the patio, leaning on the wall and looking outside. It was a gloomy fall day, and winter was nearing. The confusion of the weather matched the confusion of my emotions. I didn’t know what to feel or think.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure,” I said. It wasn’t like her to preface a question like that. It must have been something serious on her mind.

“What’s it like? Having someone?”

The question shattered my heart. I almost reached out to her, almost sat down beside her and put my hand on her shoulder. Her voice was so earnest. I realized that in all likelihood, Rosé hadn’t been in a long-term romantic relationship in _years_.

Then again, neither had I.

_You still aren’t, you idiot. You kissed her. You’re not dating. You’re just…_

But what were we really? I didn’t know.

“I don’t know,” I said, telling the truth. “I’m still figuring that out.”

She leaned even further, her face the very picture of excitement. “So… you’re going to be a thing? You and Jisoo? Really?”

“I… I don’t know.” I wasn’t sure how else to respond.

“But you want to be?”

There it was. The question of what I wanted. Last night, I had known beyond any doubt what I had wanted. But now, here, in the moment, I didn’t know.

_That’s a lie. You’re lying to yourself._

Was I?

I countered her question with one of my own. “What happens if YG finds out? About anyone, even Jennie?”

Rosé considered that for a little before responding. “I’ve seen it happen before. Not to us, but to other idols. They try to force a breakup. Usually they can, contractually. If not, fan pressure usually forces it. A lot of the fans… don’t want to see us like that.”

I grimaced. “I hate that.”

Rosé shrugged. “You get used to it.”

_But you shouldn’t have to._

Rosé’s phone buzzed and she glanced down at it. “Ah! My ride!” She beamed. “I’m so excited!”

She jumped off the couch and ran to me, wrapping her arms tight around me. “Stay safe, Ollie! I’m gonna bring you presents!”

I chuckled and returned the hug. She was irrepressible and the world needed more people like her. If only they existed.

I helped her carry her bags out to the car that was waiting for her. When I came back inside, it was starting to rain.

\---

I knew what was going to come next. It didn’t mean I felt any more confident about it.

It was amazing, really. I had led what many would consider an impossible life, packed with action and death-defying moments. Yet I was struck dumb by the possibility of having to talk to this tiny black-haired woman, the woman who seemed to be able to fill all my waking moments without even trying.

At the same time, I wanted to talk to her. I wanted to sit and listen to that melodic voice, the contagious laughter. I wanted her unique, powerful personality to come bubbling out. So I climbed the stairs to her room.

The door was open, but I knocked anyway, wanting to be polite.

<Ollie!> she said excitedly. She must have known Rosé was gone. The girls had all said goodbye to each other earlier in the day. <Come in!>

I felt strangely self-conscious in jeans and a t-shirt. The girls were used to seeing me in my fitted suits, my work clothes. Sure, they had seen me casual before. But I was just… Oliver James. Jisoo was something else entirely.

<Excited to go home?> I asked.

She was sitting at her laptop, playing some kind of fast-paced game. It was hard to see what was going on, but it almost looked like she was… shooting things? Very colorful things?

<One minute!> I could hear the concentration in her voice, so I sat down on the bed and waited for her to be finished.

True to her word, she was done only a minute later, with a fist pump and a flourish. <Yes!> she hissed, before turning in her chair to face me.

<Good game?> I asked.

<The best!> Her expression was so excited that I couldn’t help but feel excited for her. However, I did definitely notice that her packing was not even close to finished. It looked like she had barely started.

<You… uh, ready to go then?>

Jisoo looked around the room and shrugged. <I got distracted. That’s okay. It’s my right to be distracted.>

I snorted. <Yeah, I guess it is.>

<Did Chaeyoung leave?> Jisoo asked.

<Just now. I thought I’d come up and say goodbye to you, too.>

Jisoo cocked her head and smiled. <What if I was staying a little longer than I thought?>

<You are?>

<Well, I can’t leave like this, can I?>

I supposed that she was probably right about that. <You want help?> I asked.

She stood up and walked to the window, looking out at the grey and rainy day. <No. I don’t really want to leave yet.>

<Why’s that?>

She seemed to be struggling for the right words to express how she was feeling. <I get sad. When I have to leave here, I always feel sad. Even though I’m happy to see my family. Even if the

break is nice. I always end up thinking about what I’m missing here.> She paused, but didn’t turn to look at me, keeping her gaze fixed out the window. <I don’t think I know how to be happy.>

She said it so matter-of-factly, that for a moment, the melancholy weight of the words didn’t hit me. When it did, it felt like a punch to the gut.

I stood up from the bed and approached her from behind, not sure what to say or do. All I knew is that I felt a deep, overwhelming need to make her feel better in any way that I could. I reached out a hand for her shoulder, but then reconsidered. Instead, I encircled my arms around her slim waist, drawing her close to me. I felt her body relax against mine and she let out a little sigh.

<What are we going to do, Ollie?>

<I don’t know,> I said. I didn’t have that answer. <But we can’t ignore this. At least, I can’t anymore.>

She shook her head. <I don’t want to ignore it. I just… don’t want us to throw away everything that we’ve worked for.>

It was easier for me. It was easier for me to risk everything because I didn’t have much to lose. Even if the YG contract ended in disgrace, I would still have enough money and contacts to keep me going for quite some time. Freelancing could carry me even further.

It was different for an idol. Her reputation was everything. And Jisoo’s situation was different from, say, Jennie’s. Jennie and Kai… well, it would be interesting news, but that was it. Jisoo and an American bodyguard? That was a true scandal.

She turned around in my arms so that she was now looking up at me, and she reached a gentle hand up to rest on my jaw. I leaned down to kiss her once, softly. I wanted to promise her that everything was going to work out, but I had no idea if that was true. I didn’t know how it could be true.

<Can we go for a walk?> she asked. <We don’t need to go anywhere. Just outside.>

<Sure,> I said, casting a look about her room. <Will you be ready to leave?>

<I don’t care. I just want some air.>

How could I say no to that? We pulled on our coats and headed out into the gloomy afternoon weather. There weren’t many places to go near the Blackpink house, not without heading into Seoul proper, so we stuck to the alleys and back streets to avoid as many people as possible. The chance of her being recognized was slim. Even if anyone did see her, it was just her and a bodyguard, walking together. Nothing noteworthy.

<Do you regret taking the job?> Jisoo asked me as we walked. I didn’t need to request clarification. I knew exactly what she meant.

<No. I wouldn’t want anyone else doing it.>

<Even with everything that’s happened?>

As always, she had seen to the heart of the matter. She knew that there was something else going on here, even if she didn’t know what it was. She had seen the things that I had needed to do and she realized that things were changing. Into what, no one could say yet.

<Even with all that.> I didn’t trust myself to say anything else. Jisoo was too clever.

_I can’t keep lying to her like this._

But I was going to do exactly that because I didn’t want to put her in the line of fire any more than she already was.

<Just because of me?> she asked teasingly, giving me a devilish grin.

<Maybe,> I said, because that was the truth. She was a part of what had kept any regrets from my mind. Of what had stopped me from walking away when things got difficult.

The rain was still falling, but it was light enough that even though we were wet, we weren’t getting soaked all the way through. It was pleasant in the way that dreary days can be if you’re in the right mood.

<What are you going to do when we’re gone?> Jisoo asked. <You can only patrol the house so many times.>

I knew that I would probably be following Hyun-suk’s orders on a violent mission, but I couldn’t say that. My lie was harmless and boring. <Read. Explore Seoul. Rest. I haven’t had much time to myself lately. But I guess you know what that’s like.>

She nodded absent-mindedly. It looked like she had gone somewhere else in her head and I wondered if she was remembering the times before she had to live by a schedule that someone else made.

We turned a corner into another alley. There were a few people passing by here and there, but no one gave us a second look and for the most part, the street we had stuck to had been empty. No one was willing to brave the rain.

Suddenly, she stopped. It was so abrupt that I bumped into her. She didn’t seem to notice though, because she turned and looked up at me. <Kiss me,> she said.

<Out here? People could see—>

Her expression made it clear that she didn’t care. <I just want someone to kiss me in the rain. I want _you_ to kiss me in the rain.>

The smart response was to say no. The smarter response was to tell her to wait until we were back by the house. But I didn’t want to be smart. All I wanted was to kiss the woman that I was coming to care for.

So I did. With the rain falling on us, the clouds watching over, and the back alleys of Seoul around us, we kissed, our lips meeting and mingling with the droplets that were falling from the sky. I felt like I was sinking into her, like for that moment where our lips met, I didn’t really exist anymore. I felt like I had become part of her, like she had become part of me. Like we had become someone else entirely.

The moment was gone too quickly. We separated, and someone walked past us without giving us a second glance. Jisoo smiled, a secretive little smile, and I realized that I wasn’t finished yet. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her in close, kissing her harder this time.

My skin felt like it was on fire, like the raindrops were evaporating as they touched me. I wanted to stand there with her forever, locked in a perfect moment where we could be strangers to the world and utterly intimate with each other. Where we didn’t have to think, where I _couldn’t_ think, because the only thing on my mind was the softness of her lips, the curve of her body in my arms—

When we stepped away from each other, we were both breathing hard. More importantly, we were both smiling.

<How was it?> I asked. <Being kissed in the rain?>

Jisoo’s eyes sparkled. <Magical.>

I realized then that it had been the first time I had ever done that. At first I assumed that I was misremembering something. That was wrong, though. I couldn’t remember the last time I had kissed someone like that at all, let alone in the rain.

<Yeah,> I said quietly. <It really was.>

\---

Saying goodbye to Jisoo was easier than I expected. Neither of us seemed to be sad about it, and as far as I could tell, she wasn’t acting. Before she left with her bags that I had helped pack, we hugged once more and exchanged a quick kiss. Then she vanished out the front door, leaving me with a wink and a smile.

The quiet that settled on the house was heavy with melancholy. I felt light and free, but also acutely aware of how empty the usually bustling house was.

A made myself a cup of tea, using the teabags that Lisa had so generously and excitedly offered to me. I had developed a taste for tea during an assignment in England, but it was something that I was rarely able to indulge in. I spent an hour sitting on the couch, reading my romance novel and enjoying the tea.

After the hour was over, however, I knew that I needed to call Hyun-suk and find out what he wanted me to do. And if I would even be willing to do it. I had no idea what he was going to request, but part of me felt sure that it was going to shed some more light on the situation.

He picked up almost as soon as the phone started ringing. <Oliver,> he said. <It is good to hear your voice. Did you enjoy your send-off with the girls?>

What the hell did he mean by that? Was he implying that he knew something about me and Jisoo? That was impossible, right?

<It’s certainly quieter,> I said, keeping my tone as neutral as possible. <You said you had a proposition?>

<Straight to business then, eh? I do hope there aren’t any hard feelings between us.>

I kept my thoughts to myself. There were plenty of hard feelings on my end, but making them known would be pointless right now, so I elected to keep my mouth shut. Hyun-suk must have taken my silence as permission to continue.

<It’s simple, really,> he said. <I need you to enter into a certain underground club, make your way through it, and eliminate two specific individuals.>

“You want me to kill,” I said flatly, returning to English.

<Yes. Surely nothing you haven’t done before.>

<I need assurances. I will not kill innocent people just because it’s good business for you.>

Hyun-suk snorted. <I promise you, these are not ‘good people.’ If you insist, I can provide you with all the evidence that you want.>

<Dossiers would be helpful.>

<Fine. I’ll have them sent over. Along with all the relevant information.>

There wasn’t much else I needed then, other than the specific details. <I’ll get back to you as soon as I’ve looked it all over.>

<A pleasure,> said Hyun-suk, though his tone made it clear he was only dealing with me as a necessity.

I wasn’t even upset that he hadn’t thanked me for my previous actions. He and I both understood that I was doing a job, even if I was the only one who understood how tangled up and complicated things were starting to get. Before he hung up though, I had one final question. <Out of curiosity, why do you want them dead? What did they do to you?>

Hyun-suk was quiet for a few moments. When he spoke, his voice was full of venom and I was reminded of how dangerous both he and his organization could be. <They tried to take something from me. I want this to serve as a reminder why no one should ever do that.> The threat was inherent in his words and I wondered again if he knew more than he was letting on.

The call disconnected then, and I was left with my novel, my empty mug of tea, and a quiet house, waiting for the courier to bring me the files that would decide the fate of the targets.

\---

The documents were at the house by the time the sun was setting. Hyun-suk had not been exaggerating. There were two thick files, stuffed with all kinds of evidence depicting both targets as being a far cry from ‘good people.’ A man and a woman, business partners, who dabbled in everything from drug production and sale to the exploitation of sex workers. There were even hints at human trafficking, though none of that was confirmed. Both targets had a long body count, a list which included a number of innocents.

I looked over the blueprints, the plans, everything that was sent to me. The job was possible, and frankly, not very difficult. The people involved seemed to have it coming. I saw no reason why I shouldn’t accept it.

Yet… I was tempted to turn it down. I didn’t need the money that badly and it would mean more work for YG. I considered that thought for a few minutes before dismissing it. I wasn’t a petulant child. I was a professional, even if my recent actions might have made it seem otherwise. I called Hyun-suk’s secure line. The conversation was brief and absent of details. <I’ll do it.>

<Glad to hear it. If you would be so kind, alert me when it is finished.>

I assured him that I would, then I hung up and returned to me room.

It was strange, how this room already held memories to me. I had resisted putting roots down for so long, and now a guest room in a house that was occupied by four famous idols now held a spot in my heart. I thought back to my first night in the house. Back to the first time I needed to defend the girls. And I realized that this was only the beginning of our journey.

But now, I needed to put that aside.

I opened the wardrobe I was using to store my arsenal. I stared at the weapons.

It was time to go to work.

\---

It was the next night that I made my way out to the target location. The club was small and situated in a fairly seedy part of the city. It was the part of the city that tourists didn’t visit, that most people didn’t visit unless they had a damn good reason. And this time, I did.

I was armed to the teeth, not that anyone would be able to tell. I was wearing one of my fitted suit, one of the ones that was designed for combat. Everything about the outfit was suited for fighting. I had holsters on the inside, even a knife slipped into my boot. On the outside though, I just looked like Oliver James, potential client for the dark club that I was hovering outside of.

The people who were passing through the club entrance looked to be of a rough sort. Tattooed and armed. There were tell-tale bulges where their weaponry would be. The entrance was below ground level, down a flight of stairs that led into what had once probably been a basement. It was only one such club on this street, which seemed to be a hub of nightlife.

I started down the stairs, moving with a confidence that I was sure would get me through the door.

It didn’t.

The bouncer, a large Korean man, put out a hand to stop me. <Easy, American. You don’t just walk in here.>

I was disappointed, but not surprised. Places like this rarely just let anyone walk in through the front door.

<Do I sound like an American to you?> I asked, without missing a beat.

The bouncer stared me down. I didn’t bother holding the stare. Staredowns were for amateurs. I wasn’t about to let my eyes dry out before a potential fight. I could probably just kick the door in and get started right away, but I’d prefer to avoid giving my quarry a head start.

<You sound like an American who speaks Korean. I’m not impressed. And I don’t know you.>

Great. Well, he wasn’t wrong. But then how was I supposed to get in through the front door?

There was a line starting to form behind me as well. I rolled my eyes.

<How much?>

<Excuse me?>

<How much is it gonna cost me to get it? I just want a good time. If you know what I mean.>

The bouncer shifted on his feet, clearly surprised that I had mentioned something about the darker side of the club’s business. <Who are you?>

<Someone who you don’t want going to the press. Now are you going to let me in, or are we going to have a scene?>

The bouncer glared, but relented. I pressed a wad of currency into his hand as I passed. <Thanks.>

\---

The inside of the club was dark, blaringly loud, and filled with blindingly flashing lights. It was perfect for what I was going to be doing. I knew who I was looking for and I knew where they were most likely going to be located, thanks to the blueprints that YG had provided me with.

There were guards everywhere. They weren’t obvious, based on the way they were dressed, but I could tell. It was the way they were scanning the room, moving in predictable patterns. If it came to a fight, it was going to get messy.

I made my way across the dance floor, which was filled, and positioned myself at the bar. I signaled for the bartender and ordered a drink, which would at least afford me some time without suspicion.

I could see one or two of the guard conspicuously talking into an earpiece, and I knew that they were looking for me. No doubt the bouncer had given a call ahead to alert everyone to the strange American that had waltzed in.

_Maybe I can use this to my advantage._

Two guards started to approach the bar just as I picked up my drink and tasted it. Not bad. Not great, not worth the price, but not bad.

<You’re going to come with us,> said a gruff voice from behind me.

I turned, pretending to be surprised. <Sorry?>

<You heard me, pretty boy.>

A rough hand on my shoulder. I had to resist the urge to grab it and break the wrist it was attached to.

<Easy,> I said. <We don’t need a scene. I’m sure your bosses don’t want... the press.>

<Up! Now!>

I felt the barrel of a gun jam into my back. I rose from the chair, my hands raised in a placating manner. I wasn’t worried. Not yet. <Okay, okay. Where are we going?>

<Walk.>

They thought they were tough, but if they had half a brain, they would have patted me down. Granted, it didn’t look like I was armed, given how my suit clung to my body, but still. It was security 101. And I would know.

They marched me behind the bar and into the offices that were located behind the club proper. It was surprisingly lavish, but it made sense, given the amount of illicit business that went on here.

<In.> They shoved me towards an open door. I pretended to stumble inside, picking myself off the ground with a distasteful look.

A woman stepped in behind the guards, a slim Korean woman with a visible tattoo running down her neck and below the collar of her shirt. This was one of my targets. I hadn’t bothered memorizing the name. There was no point. She would be dead shortly, anyway.

<I think there’s been a misunderstanding,> I started to say.

The woman glanced at the guards. <Check him for weapons.>

Ah. I was out of time. Hopefully the man was back here in one of the offices, because if not, this was about to get a bit messy. I couldn’t let either target escape. I wasn’t going to start a car chase in the streets of Seoul, nor was I going to start a shootout in the city. The violence needed to be contained to the club. As soon as they patted me down, the game was up.

One of the guards approached me. When he was within three steps, I abandoned my helpless act and went for the gun in my armpit holster, drawing and firing a doubletap into the guard’s head.

The second armed man stood there frozen for half a second, which gave me enough time to kill him as well. The woman, who looked like she had seen this sort of thing before, didn’t panic. She went for the door, but I already had a bead on her, the gun aimed at her head.

“No,” I said, as I knew she spoke English from her dossier. “Don’t move. Not unless you want to end up like them.”

The woman put her hands up and slowly turned to face me. “I’m not afraid of you.”

“No? Well, you should be. No one heard those gunshots and you don’t have a camera in here. No one is coming.”

“They’ll be here in ten minutes if I don’t come out.”

She was bluffing, I was sure of it. Even if she was telling the truth, it didn’t matter. I could fight my way out.

The easy thing to do would be to put a bullet in her skull and move on, clearing rooms until I found the man. Instead, I was going to talk to her first. She was still going to die. In my mind, she was already a corpse. She didn’t know that though.

“What do you want?” she asked, when I didn’t respond.

“Why does YG want you dead?”

She blinked, as if she hadn’t be expecting that. “What? You’re not here to kill me?”

“I’m here for information,” I lied. “Start talking.”

“Okay. We took something that belongs to him. Or at least we tried to.”

“Drugs? Contraband? Guns?”

The woman looked at me as if I was an idiot. “Who are you? And why would you even bother coming in here if you didn’t already know?”

I hefted the gun in her direction. She flinched backward. “I don’t think you get to ask questions. Keep talking.”

“Girls.”

My blood went cold. “What?”

“Are you an idiot?”  
“Shut up. What are you talking about?”

“Girls. We wanted more of them for our club. You know what I mean. They don’t just come in off the street, we have to get them from somewhere—”

She wasn’t finished speaking, but it didn’t matter, because in the next moment, the door was kicked in and three muscle-bound goons came stomping in, guns raised. I had no time to think, so I did the only thing I could think of.

I killed the woman with one clean headshot, a bullet-sized hole materializing in her forehead, her lifeblood leaking out onto the ground. One of the men roared in anger and charged at me, the other two firing. I dove, the bullets missing me, rolled, and came up in the path of the charging man. He tried to grapple me and failed, as I took his legs out, sending him spinning to the ground. I pulled the trigger, turning him into yet another corpse.

The room was filling with blood at an alarming rate.

The unsilenced gunshots meant that the other target, the man, was no doubt on alert. I was on a tight clock now. I needed to get past these two idiots as fast as possible.

Luckily, I knew just how to do that.

I threw myself at the one guard, firing as I went. The shots went wide, but that wasn’t the point. The gun was out of bullets, so I hurled it at him and pulled the knife from my boot. The man couldn’t move fast enough and soon he was on the ground, bleeding out as well.

I feinted at the guard who was still standing, causing him to flinch back. Then I lunged forward, wrestling the gun from his hands. It went off, but it was nowhere near me. It didn’t matter. I had his arm bent, forcing his hand to open, causing the gun to fall to the ground harmlessly. A second later and my knife plunged into the underside of his skull, killing him instantly.

I picked up my empty gun and reloaded, then stepped into the hallway. There were more guards coming, I could hear them, and I didn’t see my target. That meant he was probably still back in the offices, no doubt being herded towards the emergency exit.

I was going to cut him off.

It only took me a few seconds to make my way to the exit. I actually passed by a guard on the way, who must have assumed that I was security as well, because he didn’t even look twice as I passed him with my weapon drawn.

I reached the exit at the same time as my other target. He had a scar on his face and his expression was tight and hard. I didn’t have time to ask him questions, nor did I care. I was angry at what the woman had suggested, and if it was true, then I was going to have a major problem with Hyun-suk.

_Girls..._

I knew that there was human trafficking being done in Korea, as it was done in many other parts of the world. But I didn’t know that YG might possibly have been involved. If that was true... I didn’t know if I could justify my involvement in this anymore.

But for right now, I had a job to do.

“YG says hello,” I said grimly.

My target’s eyes widened and he tried to duck behind a bodyguard, but it was too late. I had already pulled the trigger.

He was on the ground a second later, his skull in pieces.

The mission was accomplished.

But I still needed to escape. And there were at least two armed men coming right at me.

_Time to do what I do best._


	8. Interlude

_ 2018. _

_ Lisa. _

Lisa was nervous. It was silly, she knew. There was no reason for her to be feeling nervous. No reason at all. She was on break for a little, resting until the tour really picked up. Was she nervous about that?

Yeah, probably. That was it. That was all it was.

Right?

No, if she was being honest with herself, that most certainly was not it. There was something else or her mind. Or, rather, _someone_ else on her mind.

Life had gotten a little complicated lately in the Blackpink house. She wished that she could just blame the arrival of Oliver James, the bodyguard, but that wouldn’t have been true either. It wasn’t Oliver that had brought the trouble. It had been the girls themselves.

The four of them had a history of flirting with other idols, of trying to find companionship wherever they could. None of it had ever amounted to much. Jisoo had talked to Seokjin for a while, but it had never gone anywhere. How could it, with their companies constantly being in the way? It had been cute to see Jisoo and Seokjin together after the first Seoul show, but then it had been a little awkward to see Ollie and Seokjin talking to each other. How had Ollie felt? No one had even told him!

And then, of course, Jennie and Kai. That was the biggest twist. That was also the most serious relationship _any_ of them had been in since they had become idols. How serious was it, Lisa didn’t know for sure. But she _did_ know the look that Jennie got when she talked about him. And how he made Jennie smile. And how Jennie watched Kai’s performance videos online, beaming and blushing a little.

It was cute, but scary. If their companies found out… Lisa knew that it wouldn’t be pretty.

And now there was Jisoo. She seemed to have found something with Ollie. Lisa hadn’t been sure about the bodyguard at first. He was, after all, interrupting the life that they had gotten used to. But she had seen after some time that he wasn’t that different from them. He was a little gruff sometimes, a little awkward, and he was definitely keeping things from them. But she was pretty sure that he didn’t mean them any harm. He had seen Jennie and Kai together after all, and he didn’t seem inclined to snitch.

But all of that didn’t add up to the reason why Lisa felt nervous. No, that was coming from something else altogether. That was coming from something that she had done on her own—something that she hadn’t yet told anyone about, not even Jennie, her roommate.

Jisoo wasn’t the only one who had been talking to someone in BTS…

It had started as nothing more than exchanging small remarks at reward shows. Then it had progressed to texting. Then, suddenly, they were secretly meeting up, though neither of them admitted what was going on, even to each other. They were just hanging out… right?

And then he had kissed her.

She had been surprised at first. But that surprise had only lasted for a split second before she had just melted into his arms and lips.

She had made out with Jeon Jungkook on a rooftop, under the stars. Just thinking about it made her giggle to herself.

He wasn’t like what everyone thought he was. In public, she had seen him being shy, nervous, even a little awkward. When he was with her, he was a different person. He talked more, he had more attitude, more confidence. He was even a little competitive, but not in an unhealthy way. She loved the way he poked fun at her—not that he was being mean or anything, because he did the same thing to himself.

And she hadn’t told anyone yet.

The secret was building inside her, burning her up like a raging fire. She wanted to tell Jennie so badly, because after all, Jennie had told her about Kai. But Lisa just couldn’t bring herself to do it. She knew that Jennie wouldn’t be mad or anything about the secret—she wasn’t that kind of person.

It just wasn’t time yet.

Lisa was feeling nervous, and it was because she was pretty sure that she was in a secret relationship with Jeon Jungkook.

They hadn’t used that word yet—they hadn’t made it “official,” whatever that meant, seeing as they couldn’t tell the public even if they wanted to. The thought filled her stomach with butterflies. What would it be like, having a secret boyfriend?

She forced herself to discard that thought. She couldn’t think like that. She couldn’t afford to get her hopes up and then become disappointed. It was probably just a fling for both of them. They would move on. Jisoo had shown them that things like this between idols shouldn’t last.

Good old, rock steady Jisoo. Blackpink didn’t have a leader, but if it did, it would have been her. She kept them strong and she always put a brave face on, even if she wanted to cry. Lisa loved her for that.

And Lisa hoped and prayed that Ollie didn’t hurt Jisoo. If he did, there was nowhere he could run that would save him from Lisa’s wrath. She didn’t think that was going to happen, of course. Ollie seemed just as fragile as Jisoo—if not more. What was more likely was that YG would find out and put a stop to it all.

Lisa didn’t know how serious the two of them were, but she knew that having something ripped away from you so suddenly could be tremendously painful.

_Why does it all have to be so complicated?_

Once the tour began, she wouldn’t have to worry about some of this, at least for a little. They were going to be so busy that there would be no time! Tour was always grueling, but it was rewarding as well. Seeing Blinks, getting to perform, getting to travel the world… it was everything Lisa had always dreamed of. It was just a shame that it had to come with so many rules from YG as well.

She sighed and stared out the window, wishing Jungkook was there with her. Maybe one day, she’d be able to introduce him to her family… maybe one day. In the meantime, she just needed to be careful. Things were getting complicated enough. She didn’t want to make it any worse.

\---

_ Jennie. _

Why did Ollie have to be so damn good at his job? If he hadn’t walked in on her and Kai, things would have been so much simpler…

Yeah, Lisa had known. Of _course_ Lisa had known. How could she not? They were best friends and they lived together. But Chaeyoung hadn’t known for sure and neither had Jisoo. Then again, who knew what Jisoo could figure out on her own? That girl was always so clever.

Being an idol was... difficult. Sometimes, Jennie regretted following the dream. It was hard, being the center of attention, having every aspect of your life controlled by other people. She already received the most hate from the general public. If someone found out about her and Kai, it would only get worse.

There were nights when she sat down in the shower and cried, letting the water run down her body and wash away her tears. There were nights when she couldn’t sleep, so caught up in scrolling through the pages and pages of vitriol that was directed at her for the way she dressed, the way she looked, the way she smiled or didn’t, the way she didn’t perform just the way the fans wanted...

When she was with Kai though, even if they were just talking on the phone, all of that went away. He had a quiet, gentle way of talking that made her feel like everything was going to be okay, even in the worst of times. 

When Ollie had walked in on them, she had worried that Kai would freak out and decide to end it. But he hadn’t. He hadn’t even really talked about it, other than to comment that she was lucky to have someone so dedicated working with her. It made her adore Kai even more. He was steady and solid and together, they were stronger.

How long could it last though? How long could they keep it secret?

She could already hear the disappointed tone in the boss’ voice. She could already feel the crushing emptiness when they were forced to break up. Was it worth it? Was it worth the inevitable pain that was going to come?

She had seen what Jisoo had gone through when her and Seokjin had decided they couldn’t do it. Jisoo was strong, the strongest of Blackpink, and Jennie had still heard her crying at night sometimes. Jisoo tried to hide it, but when you lived together in Blackpink house, it was hard to hide some things from each other.

Jennie and Kai had talked about it a little. Of what would happen if they got found out.

_When we get found out_.

There wasn’t a question of it would happen. It was going to, eventually. They were too famous, too public, for their secret relationship to not be noticed.

Tour would take the pressure off a little. She would be so busy performing and flying around the globe that there wouldn’t be any time to worry about what was going to happen in the future.

There were other things on her mind too. Everything that had happened since Ollie had shown up... the attacks, the violence. She still woke up with nightmares sometimes. Nightmares of seeing Ollie in a pool of his own blood, or even worse, one of the group. She was forever grateful for the kindness the bodyguard had shown her. Ollie didn’t seem like an emotional man, and everything that he was experiencing looked like it was new for him.

He was dangerous and strong and even deadly—but he seemed to have a gentleness to him as well. Jennie saw how he looked at Jisoo. How he looked at all of them. He was a good person and he was doing the best he could.

But what was he even protecting them from? Who were those people? Just typical stalkers and criminals?

If that was the case, then why hadn’t there been anything in the news? Was YG just covering it up that much? There were too many unanswered questions. Jennie didn’t like unanswered questions, especially when they applied to people that she cared about.

The attacks seemed to have stopped lately, but Ollie’s continued presence made Jennie think that YG knew something that they weren’t talking about. She wanted to ask Ollie about it, but she knew that he was never going to just tell her everything. It was part of his job to keep secrets.

And that was why she swore that if he hurt Jisoo at all, in any way... she would have his head on a plate. She didn’t care how tough he was. Jisoo had spent a long time being tough and holding her emotions in. She deserved some happiness. If he took that from her... There would be hell to pay.

Jennie sighed and leaned back in the bath that she was now relaxing in. So many things to think about. So many things to worry about. That was what happened when you had so many important people in your life, she supposed. In a way, it was a blessing, but it was just as much of a curse, too.

_I just want us to be all happy_.

Sometimes, Jennie imagined what it was like to not be an idol. What it would be like when their contract expired and they were able to live their own lives. It had been so long that she had almost forgotten. It wasn’t that she was ungrateful. She knew every single day how blessed and lucky she was. How hard she had worked. And it _was_ worth it. But on those painful nights, she sometimes wondered.

Jennie remembered performing “Stay” for the first time in front of a sold out crowd and crying. They had worked so hard, sacrificed so much... and still, it wasn’t always enough. She loved her Blinks. She loved the fans. She just didn’t understand why there were so many people that felt like they needed to attack her or her members.

_I just want us to be happy,_ she thought to herself. _Whatever that means for each of us. That’s all I really want._

\---

_ Rosé. _

__

There was a lot going on. Yeah, that was the best way to put it. None of it really involved Rosé, but it _did_ involve people that she cared about. Not cared about. Loved. She loved her members. She even loved Ollie! He was a good friend and she was glad to have met him... but there was trouble on the horizon.

Rosé could practically smell the trouble. Jennie and Kai... Ollie and Jisoo... and _yes,_ they were all so damn cute, but wow, they were really asking for it.

Thinking of how cute they were made Rosé’s cheeks lift into a massive, contagious smile. She loved seeing Ollie and Jisoo together. The way they looked at each other, the smiles they gave each other when they thought no one was looking...

_But I’m looking!_

Sometimes Rosé thought about finding someone for herself. But it just hadn’t really happened yet, and for the most part, she was okay with that. It seemed stressful and there were so many ways that it could go wrong. She didn’t want to dig a hole for herself and she didn’t want to make life harder for the other members. It was okay when they did it—she didn’t mind. It made her happy to see them happy. She just didn’t want to rock the boat any more than she needed to. It didn’t feel right to her.

Sometimes, Rosé felt like things were just moving too fast. Between Ollie showing up and then the attacks, she got the feeling that something else was going on behind the scenes. But it didn’t really matter because there wasn’t much that she could do about it anyway. That was a job for other people. She was a performer, and she would always do her best, but she couldn’t do much about the rest of it. That was what Ollie was for.

Ollie! Oliver James! He was a good friend. They had spent many nights just sitting together and talking. She liked that he was quiet and thoughtful. He was secretly gentle too, Rosé knew. Jisoo had told some stories about what a gentleman he was and how he could be sweetly awkward sometimes too. Rosé loved having him around. He made her feel safe and he kept things level.

He wasn’t perfect, of course. Rosé could see things in him that the rest of the members either didn’t see or didn’t want to see. He was secretive. He was violent. She knew that he would never hurt any of them, but she also knew that he definitely hurt people in the past. He was still doing it, technically. The day at the studio was still burned into her mind—watching him tumble and struggle with armed attackers, all in the name of protecting her.

And he was lying.

Rosé didn’t know what it was that he was lying about, but she wasn’t stupid. He was keeping something from her and from the rest of the girls. She was never going to push him on it. It wasn’t her style and he knew that it would only make their relationship uncomfortable. But it was there. There was something that he wasn’t telling them. 

It made her wonder what else he might lie about. Would he ever lie to Jisoo? If so...

No, she didn’t think he would do that. She saw wonder in his eyes when he looked at Jisoo. He would never hurt her... willingly.

But he was still doing a job. What if his job meant he had to leave? What if he had to choose between Jisoo and his job? Rosé didn’t want to see Jisoo hurt again like she had with Seokjin. That hadn’t been anyone’s fault, and it had still put Jisoo into a sad state for weeks.

_There’s nothing I can do about it. I shouldn’t worry so much._

Rosé did worry anyway, simply because she loved her friends. The best part of being Blackpink, other than seeing Blinks, was being with her members. They were like sisters to her, and she would do anything for them. Lately, though, it had just gotten a little hard.

_Tour will make everything okay. It’ll be just like old times!_

It was late, and Rosé knew that she should get in bed and try to get some rest. But her brain was still going a million miles an hour, the way it so often did. So she did the same thing that she always did—she pulled out her guitar and tried to lose herself in the music.

She had so many songs that no one else had heard. She wrote them at night, when it was just her and her thoughts. A lot of people, sometimes even her members, thought that she was just a silly girl, always happy and giggling. And a lot of the time, that was true.

Sometimes, though, she had thoughts and feelings that were... different. And she didn’t usually know how to express them. Her members would understand, but the right words never came to her. So instead of speaking them, she sang them.

Maybe one day, someone would hear the lyrics. Maybe the songs would help someone, the same way they had helped her.

_I should sing some of them for Ollie._

He would probably like them. She could already see the small smile on his face as he listened, and then the embarrassed expression as he tried to explain that he didn’t know anything about music or writing. He didn’t give himself enough credit though. She was pretty sure he knew a lot more than he realized, it was just buried so deep inside himself that he had forgotten.

_Maybe Jisoo will help him dig it all up._

Rosé crossed her legs and started to strum some chords before adding her voice to the melody of the guitar. Her honey-sweet vocals began to fill the room and she felt peace come over her, the sort of peace that only music could bring her.

\---

_ Jisoo. _

Life was a blur. That was what Jisoo kept thinking to herself, over and over, as the last few weeks had unfolded. As a member of Blackpink, her life had already been fast-paced, so much so that sometimes she could barely keep track of what was happening.

But lately?

Lately things had just gotten... a little out of control.

She knew what people thought of her—that she could be a little cold or a little weird, and well, they were right. She did tend to hide her emotions until she was alone, and she definitely had a 4D personality.

What they didn’t know—or at least not all of them—was how smart she was.

Jisoo had known for some time now that YG had... other things going on. Things that the authorities would like to know about. Jisoo obviously didn’t have any proof of this, because Hyun-suk and the rest of the company was too smart for that, but she knew. The signs had been there.

It seemed for the most part that the other girls didn’t know or even suspect. If they did, they had kept it to themselves. To be fair, Jisoo had only suspected for awhile too. Until Ollie showed up.

_Ollie._

Just thinking about him made Jisoo sigh. It had come out of nowhere, their attraction to each other. Or... no, that wasn’t right, was it? It had always been obvious, she had just been trying to ignore it. And so had he.

At first, she hadn’t trusted him. The reason was simple. His appearance had confirmed what she had suspected. YG’s activities were going to put Blackpink in danger. If that was the case, then that meant he would be part of the danger. She hadn’t been very nice to him, but he had never taken offense. He had been nothing but polite, if a little stand-offish.

And then the attack had happened.

She would never forget that first time. Seeing him running back in, noticing the gun, and knowing that something terrible had happened and was still happening. Sprinting to the car, knowing that he _wanted_ them to leave him behind.

Jisoo had been the one who insisted they stay. The other girls had been surprised but had agreed with her right away. She remembered the feeling of dread growing in her stomach as more and more time passed until Ollie had come running out.

And that was when things had gone really bad.

He had almost died, she was sure of it. He hadn’t said as much and she doubted he ever would, but she knew. She knew just how close it had been. And then he had fallen at her feet in the car, bleeding and exhausted, all because he had been saving them.

Maybe it was his job. That didn’t make it mean any less to her. He had risked his life for people that he barely knew.

Everything had changed shortly after that, though it was hard for her to say when. She thought that maybe it was that same night when she had gone to check on him. Something had passed between the two of them, some sort of understanding. Some sort of electricity. And then she hadn’t been able to get him off her mind.

She knew it was a stupid idea. Of course it was. She was smart, she had always been smart. There was no realistic way she could ever make anything happen between her and a bodyguard... but she couldn’t stop thinking about it anyway.

Ollie was tough and strong, tall and muscled—she had seen that first hand when she had come to check on him that night. He was quietly funny and gentle, and she admired that he had the strength to be honest with her.

That had been most obvious on the night they had spent out together, the night that everything had almost changed. The whole night had felt magical, like they had been in some other world. She had felt like a different person. He had helped her feel like a different person. That was one of the things she liked about him. It wasn’t that he changed her or that he completed her. That was a bunch of nonsense that only led to unhealthy relationships.

Instead, he just helped her feel like herself. And she helped him too.

They had been going back and forth for what felt like forever. Maybe they would, maybe they wouldn’t. They shouldn’t, they couldn’t. They wouldn’t.

But the truth was that the real thing they couldn’t do was ignore each other. They had tried, and it just hadn’t worked. And now...

She didn’t know what they were right now, but whatever it was, it brought a smile to her face every time it came to her mind. The way he had kissed her in the rain, when anyone could have seen... it was daring, it was bold, it was a little bit foolish, but it had made her fall even harder for him

Jisoo knew that she could have any guy she wanted. She had been ranked one of the most beautiful women in Korea over and over. The thing was, she didn’t want just any guy. She wanted someone who understood, someone who _wanted_ to understand. Someone who listened and someone who talked.

Ollie was that guy. 

And yeah, he wasn’t perfect. He was secretive, which Rosé and Jisoo had talked about plenty of times. He was hiding things and his job made him more likely to lie to her. He was emotionally unavailable—he needed to be. And when this job was over, who knew where he was going to end up?

Jisoo knew all of this, but she didn’t care. Intellectually, she had gone over all the details again and again. And the conclusion she kept coming to was that... it was going to happen, one way or the other. What exactly _it_ was, well, that was still in the air. But it was happening. Inevitably.

What Jisoo hadn’t admitted to anyone yet was that she was scared. The future frightened her. Jennie and Kai presented a frightening future. Jisoo worried about if someone else found out about it. Jennie was clever and secretive... but she wasn’t perfect. And then there was Lisa... she thought that no one knew, but Jisoo had already figured out about Jungkook. And if Jisoo could figure it out... then so could other people.

The scandal that would come about as a result of the golden maknae of BTS and the maknae of Blackpink being together would be wildly destructive.

And now, Jisoo was scared about Ollie and herself. An American bodyguard and the main visual of Blackpink... it would never be accepted, not by YG nor the fans.

_I don’t care. We’ll make it work._

The magic she had felt that night had been real, which was something that she never thought that she would say. Jisoo had never believed in magic. Until that one night... then it had all felt real. Would it last?

_God, I hope so._

_Ollie..._

She rolled over in her bed and squeezed her eyes shut tightly. She imagined his strong arms wrapped around her, remembered his scent, the feel of his lips on hers. She realized that she missed him and that she couldn’t wait to get back on tour, if only to see him again.

_What’s happening to you? You’re turning into a school girl!_

The moonlight shone through her window onto her face, and she wondered if Ollie was thinking about her too.

\---

_ Oliver. _

__

The violence came naturally to him. Or maybe it didn’t, and it was actually just the years of experience that made it feel so normal. Part of him hated that. Part of him loved it.

Sometimes he felt like a different person. When he was with Jisoo, when he was sitting and laughing with Rosé, he felt like someone else, someone who wasn’t capable of doing the sort of things that he had done on a regular basis for so long.

And now, those two sides of him were all mixed up.

The part of him that Jisoo was slowly dragging out of his shell was at odds with the part of him that could kill a man with his bare hands. They were warring with each other, his head and his heart. His head, telling him that he needed to stop. His heart, telling him that he couldn’t walk away from Jisoo.

Then there was what he had just learned...

If it was true, if YG was exploiting women for money, then that was over the line. He was not going to stand by and work for someone who was violating one of his principle rules.

_But I can’t just leave the girls._

If he did, how could he guarantee their safety? Especially when they were about to embark on a tour as big as this one would be? The thought of any of them getting hurt when he had the power to stop it was painful.

Or was he just being selfish? Maybe this was just his excuse to stay close to Jisoo, his own way of making sure that he didn’t have to separate himself from her. He didn’t know. That was his greatest weakness. He knew every type of gun, how to handle any kind of knife. He could take a man down in six different ways without even having to think about it. But he didn’t know how to interpret his own feelings.

_I need to talk to Rosé. Just be honest with her. She can help._

Stupid! He sounded like a schoolboy. He _should_ just talk to Jisoo. They were adults, they could figure it out on their own. There was nothing wrong with talking.

_Unless... what if I scare her off? What if I make her uncomfortable?_

He didn’t know _what_ they were, if they were even anything. They had talked a little, sure. They had admitted to each other that they couldn’t ignore this. They had kissed. They had held each other. But... what did that mean?

If only she hadn’t left right when she did! It had been the worst possible time, right when they had been approaching solid ground for... whatever it was that they were becoming. Right after the encounter with Seokjin, too.

If he was being honest with himself, it had spurred some feelings of jealousy in him, something he hadn’t felt since he was much younger. How could he not be jealous Seokjin was shockingly handsome and well put-together, he was immensely talented, and he seemed to be remarkably kind as well.

No, jealousy was the wrong word. He didn’t feel any negative emotions towards Seokjin, and he would never dream of begrudging Jisoo a friend or confidante. It was just a surprise, that was all. He hadn’t known about Jisoo’s past, and now that he did, he was trying to wrap his head around.

_She’s just a person, just like you. She probably feels the same way about you._

Right?

_I really just need to talk to her._

Jennie and Kai had complicated things as well. Another secret to keep from the rest of the world was only going to make his job more difficult. He couldn’t tell Jennie no. First of all, he couldn’t bear the look of sadness it would bring her. And second of all, it would make him a hypocrite. If he was going to be with Jisoo, then Jennie was going to be able to be with Kai. That was just how things were going to have to be.

If YG didn’t like it… then too bad.

_Tough talk from someone who doesn’t have that much say._

Oliver realized that he was shaking in the car, that the adrenaline was still coursing through his veins.

_Deep breaths. Back to baseline._

He wished that he was driving back to Jisoo. An evening stroll and maybe some tea at a local café would calm him nicely. But he wasn’t going to see her for some time now.

_Maybe I’ll call her._

The moon was rising above him, shining into the car. He could almost imagine her sitting next to him in the starlight. One day, they would drive through the city together, talking and laughing and dreaming of the future, except it wouldn’t be the future then. It would be happening in the present.

And they would be free.


	9. Who I Really Am

_ 2018. _

I spent the Christmas holiday by myself.

It sounds sad, but the truth was that it was no different than any other year. I didn’t feel sadness or melancholy. Instead, I treated myself to a quiet meal at a café and bought myself a new book, a thick, small-printed romance that would take me quite some time to get through.

I felt at peace.

YG hadn’t spoken much with me since I had taken out both targets. I had received a bonus, as expected, and brief congratulations, but there had been no debriefing or anything of the sort. I had spent the time puzzling over what I was going to do with what I had learned.

The answer, I realized, was nothing. For now. In the future, I was going to have to make a decision—either ignore it or pursue it on my own. If I chose to pursue, then that would mean going directly up against YG. I was fine doing that, but it would have to be secretive. I couldn’t risk the girls.

My musings had taken up too much of my attention and I realized that I hadn’t comprehended a word of the last page I had read. I was about to go back and start it over when my phone began to buzz. I was surprised—who would be calling me on Christmas eve? Surely, Hyun-suk wasn’t trying to reach me. Perhaps the Firm?

When I checked the caller ID though, my eyes widened.

Kim Jisoo, it read.

My heart skipped a beat and I steadied myself, getting my excitement under control. _You’re an adult,_ I had to remind myself.

<Hey,> I said after answering. <Everything okay?>

<Why would something have to be wrong for me to call you?> she mock-scolded me. <Merry Christmas eve, Ollie!>

<Merry Christmas,> I said warmly. <Thanks for calling.>

<Where are you?> she asked. <Did you go home?>

I looked around the café and smiled. <No, not really.>

<You’re not with family?> she sounded confused.

I shrugged, even though I knew she couldn’t see. <No family left.>

There was a pause. When she spoke, her voice was small and sad. <Oh. I’m sorry.>

<It’s okay,> I said, meaning it. <I haven’t thought about that in a long time.>

<Are you feeling good?> she asked.

I thought about that question. That too, was something that I hadn’t thought much about in a while. My life, for a long time, hadn’t belonged to me. It belonged to my job, to my clients. I served them as best I could, and my needs came second. Always. That was part of my CIA training, I supposed. I had done things that were necessary but that had been hard on me—both physically and mentally.

<I like the quiet,> I said finally. <I think I do feel good.>

<You think?> I could practically picture the teasing expression on her face as she said the words.

I rolled my eyes. <You like to ask me hard questions, what can I say? What about you?>

She sighed, but it was a happy sigh. <I feel so good! I feel relaxed. I love the holidays, you know? Everyone is so happy. But... you know what?>

<What’s that?>

<I feel a little lonely, too. I miss my members. I miss... you.>

<I miss you too, Jisoo,> I said, feeling the weight of each word on my heart. I _did_ miss her, and that was something that I hadn’t said to someone in years. <Do you know when you’re coming back?>

<I thought I’d come back a few days early,> she said. <For New Year’s.>

I didn’t understand. Wouldn’t she need to clear that with YG? Also... <I thought Korean New Year’s wasn’t until a little later. We’d be on tour then, right?>

She sounded a little embarrassed. <Well... yeah. You’re right, it’s not. But I was thinking about your New Year’s. I thought you might like the company.> Her voice trailed off. <I don’t have to though! If you’d rather be alone—>

<No,> I said. <I’d love the company.> I realized I had a huge smile on my face. <I just don’t want to take you away from your family time.>

<It’s okay,> she said quickly. <I like them. I like being here. But... I think I’d like to come back. And see you. If that’s okay.>

<Of course it’s okay,> I said softly. <I would love that.>

<Exciting!> said Jisoo, and her tell-tale enthusiasm had crept back into her voice. <We’re going to have so much fun!>

I would clear it with YG. Hyun-suk couldn’t get too upset about it—she would be with me the whole time, which was unarguably the safest place for her to be at all times.

<Anything you want to do?> I asked. <You know, before everyone else gets back. We can go anywhere.>

<Anywhere?> she asked, her voice full of wonder. I almost laughed. It was charming to see how joyful she could become. <I’ll have to think!>

Our conversation continued on for a little longer after that, and not once did we talk about Blackpink, or the tour, or YG. It was as simple as two people sharing a quiet moment over the phone, and it was exactly what I needed to hear. Her voice, as always, calmed me, and I struggled to remember the hostility she had shown me when we had first met. I was so glad to have earned her trust.

By the time we hung up, it was getting late, and I didn’t want to sit too long at the café without ordering something, so I paid my tab, picked up my book, and strolled out in the chilly night. I wrapped my coat tightly around myself and walked out into the stars, feeling hopeful, and enjoying it.

\---

I was falling asleep, comfortable in my bed, my book resting on the table beside me, when my phone began to ring again. My heart jumped and I almost had to laugh at my reaction. It just went to show that no matter how much training and experience you have, none of us like to be woken up abruptly.

When I saw who it was though, my nervousness vanished, but my curiosity remained. It was so late. What was she doing calling me now?

“Rosé?” I asked. “What’s wrong?”

Her voice was thick with tiredness, the sweetness of it tinged with fatigue. “Can’t sleep,” she said, and I could immediately tell how frustrated she was. “Sorry. Didn’t want to wake you up. Just wanted to hear you talk.”

I smiled quizzically. “Yeah? What do you want to hear me talk about?”

“I don’t know,” she said, her frustration becoming more apparent. “I just want to sleep.”

“Yeah,” I said, softening my tone, understanding. Once upon a time, I had struggled with the same thing. “I understand. Something on your mind?”

Rosé sighed. “I don’t know. Just worried about things. Can’t stop thinking.”

“Did you try singing?” I knew that sometimes when she couldn’t sleep, she would write music or play her own songs to calm herself down.

“Yeah. Didn’t work.”

“I’m sorry, Rosie.”

“Can you just talk to me for a little? I’m sorry. I don’t want to keep you up. I just needed a friend.”

I smiled to myself. She sounded so dejected and I could picture the expression on her face. She was always so expressive, always wearing her heart out on her sleeve. “Hey. Rosé. It’s okay, I promise.”

“Okay.” She sounded small, and I could picture her curling up into a ball, her eyes wide.

“I don’t know if I have any stories to tell you,” I said. “But we can just talk for a little if you want. What do you want to talk about?”

“Tell me a dream you have,” she said. I could hear her moving around and I knew that she was snuggling herself into the blankets, trying to get herself as comfortable as possible.

_A dream that I have?_

I was silent for a few moments while I tried to think of something to say. She always managed to ask me something that I was unprepared for. I guess that was probably because she was an artist at heart, and I was not. I never had been. It wasn’t the way my brain worked.

“I want to be happy,” I said finally, and the words surprised even me. “I want to just be able to wake up and feel good about who I am.”

“Tell me more,” she said.

“Sometimes I look around and wonder what happened. I like what I do. I’m good at it and I’ve done important things in my life. Sometimes they were good things... sometimes they weren’t. But I could always justify it all to myself. People’s lives depended on what I did. They still do.”

“But you’re not happy?”

“I’m... not unhappy. But I don’t know what I’m doing anymore. Or why I’m doing it.”

“Something changed your mind?”

“Yeah.” I knew what the answer was, but I didn’t know if I wanted to say it. I supposed since I had come this far, there was really no holding back. “You all did.”

“Aw, Ollie!”

I was deep in it now. My face was red, but honestly, it felt good to speak the truth. “It was you first, I think. I haven’t had many friends over the past years. My job makes it hard. And then after you, of course, there was Jisoo...”

Rosé let out a little squeal. “You two are so cute. Tell me about her.”

“Rosie...”

“C’mon, Ollie, tell me!”

I sighed. I couldn’t say no to her. Not since we had started getting close. She was so enthusiastic, so open and honest, that I just couldn’t bring myself to say it. So I relented and started to tell her about Jisoo.

“I think the first time I saw her, I was just... surprised. At how beautiful she was.” The words sounded awkward coming from my mouth, but it felt good to say them. “And she didn’t like me, of course. No, you don’t have to try to convince me. I know she didn’t. And she had good reason not to. She didn’t trust me. She wanted to keep you guys safe. And I was used to that.”

“Things changed after the first attack. I think she saw another side of me then. And I saw another side of her. The more time I spent around her, the more I realized how much she cared about each of you, and even me. And then there was that night she wanted to sneak out...”

Rosé said nothing, but I knew she was waiting for whatever I was going to say next.

“Maybe it was a mistake, but that was the night we first realized it. That there was something else to the two of us. That... maybe we didn’t have to be alone.”

“Ollie... that’s so sweet. Have you told her that?”

_Have I? I guess... not really. Not in so many words._

“I didn’t want to scare her off. It’s so early. And I’m... bad at this.”

Her voice was getting sleepier, and I knew the conversation wasn’t going to last much longer. “You should tell her. I think she needs to hear something like that.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah... she spends so much time being strong for us, you know? It might be nice for her to hear that from someone.” Rosé yawned and I heard more rustling, no doubt her getting into a more comfortable position. “Thanks, Ollie. You’re a good friend.”

“Sleep well,” I said warmly. “And don’t worry—if you ever need to call me, I’ll always be able to talk to you.”

“Be careful... what you wish for...” she said sleepily. “Good night, Ollie. Sweet dreams.”

We disconnected then, and I rolled over in my bed, my head full of thoughts and my stomach full of butterflies.

\---

Jisoo kept her promise, coming back to Seoul early. The girls were only supposed to come back a couple of days before the tour resumed, which struck me as putting them through unnecessary stress, but apparently, no one cared about them except for me.

She made her return though on December 30th at night. I barely got to see her at all, because she blew in, unpacked, and then got right in bed, telling me that she needed all the sleep she could get if she was going to stay up for New Year’s.

I didn’t argue, knowing that I had no chance of convincing her otherwise. Despite the fact that I knew she was right, I still felt a twinge of disappointment. I had been looking forward to her return and I didn’t even really get to enjoy it.

That was just my selfishness talking, though. I knew better than to actually let those feelings get the better of me. I knew firsthand just how disorienting travel could be, and she deserved all the rest that she could get.

When she woke up the next morning, she looked bright and cheery. I couldn’t help but smile as she bounced down the stairs.

<Good morning, Ollie!> she practically sang as she skipped into the kitchen. Her voice was always so melodic, even when she was just speaking.

<So what’s the plan for our New Year’s?> I asked. I had done some research, and it turned out that they celebrated a bit more in Korea than I had originally thought. It wasn’t the “traditional” New Year, but that didn’t stop parties and the like from happening.

<I don’t know,> she said brightly, looking for some fruit to make a smoothie. <And I think that’s fun!>

I snorted. <You want to just wander the streets of Seoul?>

She threw a glance at me from over her shoulder and followed it up by tossing me an apple. <Why not?>

Well… I didn’t see any reason why we _couldn’t_ do that, aside from it being something of a minor nightmare in terms of security. But then again, I was the best. That’s why YG was paying me a small fortune.

<I think we could make that work,> I relented, taking a bite from the apple. <How are you feeling?>

<Better,> she said, starting to prepare her breakfast. <Travel makes me so tired.>

<Hope you’re rested for tonight,> I joked. <I’m not missing midnight.>

She scoffed. <Who do you think you’re talking to?>  
I liked the easy banter. It reminded me—almost—of the dynamic we had when I had first arrived, but no longer hostile. Going back and forth, but this time, she trusted me. It was a testament to how clever and strong-willed she was. Even so, Rosé’s words from the previous night stuck in my mind. This would be a good night to have a serious conversation.

I had been a little worried that things would be awkward between us—this was something new for both of us. At the very least, it was new ground for me. She had a little experience with Seokjin, but I knew that hadn’t worked out the way she had wanted.

<How do you want to spend the day?> I asked, as she assembled the blender and dropped the ingredient in.

<I want to get a nice dress!> she said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. <Take me shopping?>

I grinned. I could do that.

\---

Over the course of my life, I’d been to many cities and many countries, but there was something about Seoul that was different. Maybe it was just because I was looking at it through new eyes, but it felt more alive than almost any other place I’d been.

Being with Jisoo only added to that feeling. She pointed out everything that she liked, anything that made her smile. She loved cute things—and Seoul was filled with them.

<I’m sorry,> she said, after the third stuffed teddy that she had pointed out in a window. <These are silly.>

I couldn’t restrain my smile. <I like watching your happiness.>

She blushed a little at that, looking down, but then her attention was captivated by a store in the distance, and we were on the move again.

The streets seemed to be a little more full than usual, no doubt due to the date. Normally, that would have worried me, but it helped the two of us blend in. We were both dressed casually, in the hopes of appearing as just another couple. Even still, we were both always wary of any possible reporters, tabloids, or paparazzi, eager for a glimpse of one of the members of Blackpink. It helped that officially, Jisoo was supposed to be out of the country for another few days. No one knew to look for her.

<Here,> she said, entering into a women’s clothing store that looked like it likely serviced celebrities exclusively. We stepped inside and were almost immediately greeted by a well-dressed middle-aged woman who spoke softly with a cultured voice.

<Kim Jisoo,> she said with a polite bow. <Always good to see you.>

My nervousness must have been showing on my face, because as the woman led us to an area of dresses, Jisoo leaned in to whisper in my ear. <They’re good at secrets. That’s what they do.>

I relaxed a little. I had seen places like this before, of course, places that were so high-end that they understood the importance of utmost discretion. It didn’t matter too much, really. I looked like a bodyguard and there was nothing unusual about a famous idol travelling with some extra muscle.  
Jisoo ran her hand over a gorgeous midnight blue dress and turned to look at me. <What do you think?> she asked, her eyes sparkling.

<I don’t know,> I said honestly, before casting one more nervous look at the attendant. Privacy was one thing, but an idol wouldn’t talk to their bodyguard that way. They certainly wouldn’t _look_ at their bodyguard that way.

<Hey,> Jisoo said, apparently noticing how nervous I was. <It’s okay. They’re the best.>

The middle-aged woman offered me a professional nod. <Our clients’ privacy will always be our number one concern. I’m sure you understand. No matter who they are. That’s how we developed our reputation, and we will keep it.>

I gave her an uneasy smile, knowing that if Jisoo trusted them, then I should too. It was just that while I could control the physical world with great ease, it because much harder for me to control things like the news and the media. And Hyun-suk would not be pleased to see speculation that his main visual and her bodyguard were getting a little too friendly.

<How about this,> I suggested, gesturing towards a black number that looked downright dangerous. I was half-joking—Jisoo wearing that would be beyond a knockout, she’d be utterly stunning.

Her eyes lit up again and she let out a little gasp. <Oh! It’s…>

<Too much,> I said quickly, feeling awkward. <Sorry. I did like the blue one.>

<Amazing!> exclaimed Jisoo, twirling to the employee, who was wearing a sardonic grin. <Can I try it?>

The woman nodded. <We have one in your size in the back. If you’ll just step this way.>

Jisoo rushed past me, her hair flying out behind her, and I hoped that she was right about trusting the discretion of this place. Things would be rather awkward if she wasn’t.

But she was heading to the dressing room now, so I followed, caught up in my thoughts and making sure that I kept the exits and our surroundings in view at all times.

\---

The dressing room was large—or at least it appeared to be from the outside. I didn’t go in, but part of me wondered what might have happened if the attendant hadn’t been there. Jisoo had given me a mischievous look before going in, and it wouldn’t have surprised me if she had invited me in with her.

Instead, I took up a protective post outside the door.

The middle-aged employee busied herself with some paperwork while we waited. I appreciated her professionalism—she wasn’t trying to make small talk or otherwise do anything unnecessary. She simply did her job, and that was it. I could identify with that.

I heard the door open from behind me, and before I could turn, I heard Jisoo say, <So what do you think?>

I got a good look at her and felt my heart leap into my throat. It took me a moment to collect my thoughts enough to answer. <I think you’ve found the one.>

It was short, showing off her long, long legs, and belted around her waist, accentuating her figure. Her neck was on display, as was a slight v that came down off her neckline. Her shoulders were bare. Again, I was taken aback by how short she was—the dress made her seem taller. Her confidence made her seem taller.

She gave a little twirl. <Finish it off with some boots! We’re going to have such a good time tonight.>

The employee was very clearly pretending to not pay attention. I had to force myself to relax.

<Time to buy!> Jisoo said excitedly. <Oh. Wait.>

<What is it?>

< I need to change out of it first.>

\---

There wasn’t much else we needed to do, so we decided to head back. Jisoo claimed that she wanted to “get ready” for tonight. I had no idea what she specifically meant by that, seeing as there were still hours before any potential parties would be starting, but that was fine with me. I could read and she could do… well, whatever it was she was planning on doing.

<You’re always reading!> she teased when I told her my plans. <Don’t you do anything else?>

<Don’t have much time for anything else,> I said.

<So boring! I’ll have to teach you some games.>

<We’ll see,> I said, but my tone must have been too skeptical because she jumped on it in that quick way I had seen her do before.

<We’ll see? We’ll see? No! I will teach you. And you will get better than everyone else except for me, because I’ll always be better.>

I laughed at her mock seriousness. <Well, when you put it that way, I can’t really argue, can I?>

<Of course not. You know I’m right.>

I was excited for tonight and even more excited to see her in the dress again. I knew that whatever we ended up doing, it was going to be a special night. But what I couldn’t allow myself to do was get sloppy. It didn’t matter how special the night was, I still needed to make sure that nothing happened to Jisoo.

Which is how I became acutely aware that someone was following us.

It was strange—I picked them up almost as soon as we left the shop, which meant they had probably seen us go in. It was unclear how they had known we would be there, since I had told no one and I assumed Jisoo hadn’t made the information public either. Had they been following us the entire time? That seemed unlikely, but it _was_ possible.

On the other hand, maybe they had just been watching places that Jisoo was known to like. That information couldn’t have been that hard to find. I had seen what fans could do on social media with just a few pictures—a criminal organization? They could easily do the same thing.

I didn’t want to panic Jisoo, but truthfully, I didn’t think that was going to be a problem. She didn’t panic easily. Even still, I decided to keep it quiet. As far as I could tell, there was only one person following us. And I had an idea.

<This way,> I said casually to Jisoo, turning her into an alley, guiding her with my arm. I wouldn’t be able to keep the facade up for long, but as long as I could get us in a narrow space, alone with our tail...

It worked. The alley was empty aside from Jisoo and me, and there were narrow passages leading between the buildings that composed the alleyway. It was exactly what I had been hoping for.

She was looking at me with confusion, not understanding why I had led her down a path that was going in the opposite direction of our destination. I shook my head, not wanting to say anything and jeopardize the plan that had formed in my mind.

<Here,> I said, my voice low. I grabbed her shoulder and steered her down one of the narrow passage way. <Wait here.>

She looked up at me, her eyes wide and questioning.

<Trust me.>

She nodded silently and I saw that she did. She trusted me wholeheartedly. I swore to myself I would honor that trust she had placed in me. I would find a way to make myself worthy of it.

But then I needed to turn away from her, to become the other part of myself, the one that I didn’t want her to have to see. I drew my gun from the inside of my suit and flattened myself against the corridor wall, daring only to take the briefest of peeks into the alley itself.

Yes. There he was, the same man from before, cautiously making his way towards us. He had only just entered the alley. I slowed my heartbeat, calming my breathing and preparing myself for what was about to happen.

The man was dressed in a hoodie and baggy pants, making it hard to tell how thoroughly he was armed. I had no doubt that he had a weapon, but I couldn’t make out what it was.

Slowly, he checked each corner, until he was only a few steps away from where we were hidden. I almost glanced back at Jisoo, but decided against it, figuring that I couldn’t afford any possible distraction.

_One. Two. And..._

I threw myself out from the narrow corridor, gun raised. I slammed into the hooded man, using my forearm to press him into the alley wall, my gun firmly jammed into his side.

<Don’t fucking move,> I hissed. <I’m gonna ask you some questions and I’m going to want answers.>  
The man’s eyes widened with fear and for a moment, I thought he was going to scream for help.

<Don’t. You’ll be dead before anyone even hears.> It wasn’t an idle threat. My gun was silenced and the city was loud.

<What do you want?> the man asked, his voice wild and afraid.

<Don’t fuck with me. I know you were following us. Who sent you? Why are you after her?>

The man’s fear at least partially transformed into confusion. <Her? Who?>  
I would have accused him of lying to me again, but I could tell from his reaction that he didn’t know what I was talking about—it wasn’t an act. <Then why were you following us?>  
<You’re the one who hit the club, weren’t you?> It was a question, but he already knew the answer.

<What, you out of a job now? You want revenge?>

The man shook his head vehemently. <No! I had a message for you!>

<For me?>

<YG isn’t what you think they are!>

I pushed the gun harder into his stomach. <Yeah? And what’s that supposed to mean?>

This was not going in the direction that I had expected it to do. To make matters worse, Jisoo was still watching—and this was not a light I wanted her to see me. Plus I wasn’t sure if I was going to have to kill this man or not and the thought of Jisoo watching me pull the trigger on someone that I had pushed up against a wall made me sick.

<You don’t know what they’re having you do!>

<I know exactly what I did. I killed two people that were responsible for inexcusable actions.>

<What makes you think YG is any better?>

Truthfully, I didn’t think that YG had any moral high ground, but I wasn’t going to admit that to this stranger. <They’re an entertainment company,> I sneered. <I don’t think that comes close to the mud that your bosses were dealing in.>

<Like trafficking girls?>

<YG doesn’t have the capability to do that!> But I wasn’t so sure. That wasn’t what it had sounded like when I had made the hit on the nightclub. <Unless you have proof, then we’re done here. Stay away from me. Stay away from my clients.>  
The man’s eyes widened. <I can’t give you proof! You know what that would mean!>

Of course I did. Any proof that implicated YG would implicate others as well, including his employers. I had killed two of them, but there would surely be others moving to fill the vacuum. YG wasn’t trying to eliminate competitors, it was trying to send a message.

<Then I have nothing left to say to you.>

<Look! You’ll find something! There are traces!>

<You’re just trying to save your own skin.>

<I’m telling the truth!>

I felt an uncharacteristic rage fill me. How dare he? Who knew what kinds of terrible things he had done—and now he was trying to convince me that he wasn’t my enemy? No. I wouldn’t fall for that. He had been following us for one reason, and one reason only—he had seen Jisoo, recognized her value, and decided that he could take one bodyguard.

_But he said he recognized you, why would he—?_

There was still a small voice of logic trying to reason with the anger that was burning through my veins, but it was quiet and it was losing the argument rapidly.

Everything went red, and I felt my trigger finger begin to tighten, until I felt a small hand on the small of my back, followed by the gentle closeness of a familiar figure.

<Oliver.>

It was one word, three syllables, spoken so quietly that it was barely audible. But the second I heard it, the red mist that was obscuring my view vanished, leaving me standing in an alley with a terrified man at gunpoint.

I released him so quickly that he almost fell to the ground. He scrambled to his feet and sprinted away, leaving me with no doubt that we would likely never see him again.

I looked at my gun as if I had never seen it before, then unsteadily placed it back in its holster. <Jisoo… I…>

My face was burning. I felt shame, deep shame, from the very core of my being. It was turning my stomach into a swamp that was sucking my heart down, down, down, so much so that I didn’t know if it would ever manage to rise again.

<It’s okay,> she said, her voice still quiet. <Come here.>

I didn’t want to turn around to face her. I didn’t know how I was supposed to. Killing an attacker, that was one thing. Threatening and almost executing an unarmed man… that was different. Yes, I’d done it before. Even recently, at the nightclub. But Jisoo hadn’t been there. She didn’t know. And she likely never would.

<Ollie. It’s okay. Come here.>

I turned then, her voice compelling me to follow her request. She was looking up at me with wide eyes, and for a second, I felt horror overtake me. She was afraid of me. Of course she was afraid of me. She had just nearly seen me do something unthinkable.

Then I realized that it wasn’t fear. It was… pity. And sadness.

“I am sorry,” she said in English. And she wrapped her arms around me, pulling me close to her.

I stood there, dumbfounded for a moment, before allowing myself to return her embrace, sinking into her arms, feeling her warmth against me, and letting go of all the emotions that had just threatened to overwhelm me.

“It’s okay,” she said. 

But as much as I wanted that to be true, I didn’t know if I could believe it.

\---

We barely spoke until we were back in the Blackpink house. I couldn’t find the words to express what I was feeling and her face gave no indication as to what was going on in her head. I had no idea if I had ended our plans for the night—if she would even want to go anywhere with me after what she had seen.

I was standing in the kitchen, looking out a window, lost in my thoughts. She had come in and gone to put her dress away and I assumed, get some time to herself.

As it turned out, I was wrong.

<Do you want to talk?>

Her voice seemed so loud in the silence of the house, even though she kept her tone gentle.

<I don’t know.> I didn’t know what I was feeling and I didn’t know what I wanted to say. I felt lost, more than I had in a long time. <My life was simple for a long time. I did what I needed to do. And... you know what that is, I think. Or at least, you know enough. Now... nothing feels simple anymore.>

<You hurt people,> Jisoo said. The words, on their own, sounded judgmental, but her tone was accepting. She wasn’t accusing me. She was stating a fact, a fact that she seemed to have accepted.

I gripped the counter so hard that my knuckles ached. <I don’t know what kind of person I am anymore.>

She came closer to me, coming around the island in the center of the kitchen. She placed her small hand on top of mine. I felt the tension flow out of my clenched fingers at her touch.

<What if I’m not a good person?>

I saw her face fall and I didn’t understand why at first. Then she leaned in to hug me again, holding me tightly. I couldn’t bring myself to return the gesture.

<You’re asking the question, aren’t you?> she said. <That means you care. I see how much you care. I always did. Even when I thought that I didn’t.>

<Jisoo... I’ve done things... bad things. You don’t know.>

I thought about my past, the places I had been. The things I had done. The people I had killed. How naive was I, to think that this woman, this kind, caring, intelligent woman, could possibly be with someone like me? It was unthinkable. It was unbearable. It was wrong.

<Do you want to talk about it?>

I shook my head and I felt my eyes beginning to burn. <I wouldn’t know how.>

<One word at a time,> she said, pulling out of the hug and offering me a smile. <That’s all.>

<I... I can’t. Not now.>

She nodded, and somehow, impossibly, I saw understanding in her eyes. <Maybe one day then. I’m a good listener.>

We were quiet for a little, though the thoughts that were swirling through my head were louder than a hurricane.

<I’m going to get ready,> she said suddenly. <If you want to talk, you can just come in.>

I looked at her with mild astonishment. <You... still want to go?>

<I didn’t buy the dress for nothing!>

<After what I did?>

Jisoo’s smile faded and she gave me a stern look. <You are not the only one to do something bad to accomplish something good. Do you think I’m innocent?>

<You’ve never—>

<Hurt someone? Not with my fists. But with my words? With what I did? Or with what I didn’t do?>  
<What do you mean?>

<I am not stupid, Ollie. I know YG is doing things that they should not be doing. But I’m still here anyway.>

I shook my head. <That’s different, that doesn’t make you a bad person—>

<No! It’s not. The right thing to do is walk away. But I didn’t do that. I’m still not doing that.> Her expression was still stern and tone left no room for argument. <I’m going to change. We’re going out.>

She turned away definitively and walked upstairs. I watched her go, her hair swishing behind her as she went.

Before she made it to the stairs, she stopped to shout one last thing to me. <And we’re going to have fun!>

Then she disappeared onto the staircase, leaving me alone with my storm of thoughts. Was she right about me? I hoped she was, but I didn’t know.

_Can I still be happy?  
Do I deserve that right?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, as always, to everyone who is still reading! You guys are a big reason why I do this.
> 
> The other reason of course is because I love our girls!
> 
> Don't forget to support Rosé tonight when her solo video debuts! I hope you all preordered and plan on streaming a lot ^_^ Let's get her even bigger numbers!
> 
> Comments and kudos keep me going ;) Love you guys!

**Author's Note:**

> This is entirely a work of fiction. The events of this story are written solely for entertainment purposes. To the best of my knowledge, NONE of this is true. There will be inaccuracies as I tell the story, simply to fit the narrative I am trying to tell.  
> For any readers who may be coming from my other story, this will be more of a literary tale, with more focus on characters, drama, and action, than anything else.  
> Comments keep me going! I love to hear what you're thinking.


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